bluefall

And GLaDOS interjects like, "You didn't do this. She did all the work!"

I find that interjection fascinating because. Like.

GLaDOS doesn't actually know anything about what happened behind the scenes. She lost track of Chell and Wheatley after Wheatley opened up a wall panel and they bolted off together into the facility's inner workings. She doesn't see them again until Chell falls for her fake door trap, at which point GLaDOS is unpleasantly surprised to discover that Chell's disabled the turrets and neurotoxin in the meantime.

She has no evidentiary foundation to base that accusation on.

This is also before GLaDOS recognizes Wheatley as the Dumbass Core, so it's not based on an assessment of him.

The only explanation it leaves is that it's based on her assessment of Chell. Despite GLaDOS's enmity towards Chell, the one thing she rarely goes after Chell for is her intelligence.

When she does, it's an admission of her high standards for Chell; Like when the fake door trap works and GLaDOS concedes, "I didn't actually think that would work. I already built a much better, smarter trap up ahead for when this one fails." That's a backhanded insult. It's calling her dumb, but in a disappointed way rather than an affirming way.

Chell tests very well. Between the two games, GLaDOS has developed a strong understanding of Chell's aptitude for critical thinking and problem-solving in stressful situations.

Aww, yeah, that's such a good addition! Because the little sister world is a really lonely one for Celine - and you're right, she's normally fine with being lonely by herself, but Rumi has also recently made it clear how much she feels Celine failed her so is Celine really going to repeat her mistakes with this baby?

Any couple that wants to make their relationship serious have to have an understanding about kids, obviously, but it's all kinds of extra urgent and impactful in this case. If Eunae is hitting up a pregnant lady for a long-term relationship, she's signing up to be Mom 2 from basically the start, and Celine has to decide a bunch of things very quickly: does she actually want this for itself or is she being swayed by the desire to not have to raise Dasom alone? Is this someone she can raise a kid with, who she trusts to agree with her about discipline and bedtimes and schooling? Even more, is this someone she can raise a Hunter with, someone who's going to be able to understand and keep up with the demands, there? Is Eunae going to look at this and go "my kid has been chosen for something heroic and sacred and important, and I'm scared for her but very proud," or is she going to say "no I will not be raising a child soldier"?

Several of which are questions that she probably can't confidently answer without reading Eunae in on the Hunter thing, of course, which she may feel obligated to touch base with Huntr/x on, first, and then she has to deal with all of their opinions on all that, too.

(If Eunae has never had kids, that does help Celine's position, since she's going to be the voice of experience, but in the long run it will still have to be a partnership, she's still going to have to trust that this is someone who can have independent authority over her daughter.)

The dynamic changes if they're friends for a longer time and Celine and Dasom are firmly established as their own unit before Eunae makes a move ("you.... want me?!??" "Have for about six years now, thanks for noticing" sort of thing), but the longer they go without the Hunter Reveal the more dramatic it becomes, the more it impacts their own relationship, and the more Celine is able to stabilize herself, adapt to the awkward new normal with Rumi and Dasom, and start pushing Eunae back out of any real level of intimacy in favor of the same "loves dearly but refuses to rely on or be vulnerable with in any way" that she uses on her kids.

Currently: the wraiths are dead (mostly), and Rumi didn’t even kill Bobby in the process—many thanks to Zoey, who’s formally decided to drop out of med school and join Celine’s shamanic order. That said, Minji and Miyeong need a hospital, and Mira needs a little more than that.

Celine isn't exactly surprised when the nurse asks Miyeong about patient privacy and she waves her hand, dismissive, and says "It's fine, she can hear whatever," but the trust warms her, anyway. Miyeong looks a little surprised when Celine wraps their fingers together after a particularly unhappy wince, but she holds on, and Celine texts Minji and Zoey one-handed and tracks the opiates kicking in by the intervals between the painful tightening of her grip.

There's a wait for X-rays, another wait for surgery, and as Miyeong's pain slowly subsides, Celine updates her on Minji — no concussion, her tongue needs stitches, she'll be able to come visit by the time Miyeong is out of surgery if Miyeong doesn't think that's an opsec problem too — and Mira, whose cleansing may require all four of them or retrieving a few things from Celine's office, but shouldn't be any more of an issue than Miyeong's surgery.

Miyeong is clearly relieved to hear both, but remains pensive, and Celine eventually prods, gently. "Worried about your knee?"

"... Yeonggi wasn't there."

"... ah."

"We can— wraiths do their routines from life, right? When they're not doing anything else? We can find him, I can find him, but I don't know..."

She trails off, and Celine waits. The chair isn't all that comfortable, and her arm's at a bit of an awkward angle, but she will wait a hundred years for Miyeong, if that's what Miyeong needs.

She is, however, silently staring and vibrating with energy as the doctor explains what he’s doing, such that Minji decides against reminding the idiot that she’s a nurse, and does in fact know what local anesthetics and absorbable sutures are.

(Doctors.)

Minji updates Celine (and Miyeong) and Zoey (and Mira) whenever she has a spare moment—it won’t be long, but it will be an annoying month or two of soft foods.

Discharge instructions taken, Minji levers herself up off the bed, trying not to roll her eyes at Rumi’s nervous hands, waiting to catch her—concussion or no, she isn’t exactly in perfect form.

To her surprise, though, the door is opening again. “Minji?”

Minji feels a pit open up in her chest as she recognizes the woman at the door. Hyeonsuk moved over to work at the university three years back, but that didn’t mean—

“Minji,” Hyeonsuk breathes, rushing in. “It is you.”

Rumi gets in the way before Hyeonsuk can go for a hug. She just stands, solid, silent, a wall in human form and she looks at Minji. Hyeonsuk makes a startled sound.

“It’s okay,” Minji manages, even if the words come out slurred around the anesthetic’s influence on her tongue. “She’s… my friend.”

Maybe the only one Minji has left.

She looks at Hyeonsuk, not quite in the eyes, unable to manage that over the horrible guilt. “My niece. She’s protective, since…”

(Accurately, she supposes, fitting Rumi into her family tree, a first cousin once removed might make more sense—Misuk-imonim will be so happy to have gotten another grandchild, she’s sure.)

Rumi bows heavily in apology as she steps back. “I did not mean to cause trouble.”

“No, no,” Hyeonsuk says. “I just—I saw your name and I needed to see if—we thought you were dead, Minji.”

Minji doesn’t know what to say to that. There is no good answer.

I should’ve been there is almost as bad as We killed the things that did it. She and I and a wondrous mudang and an American and a witch. I think Miyeong might’ve gotten one, I’m not sure. We killed them.

She doesn’t think either truth will calm her, anyway.

It’s fine. If she focuses enough, she can map out the blotchy brushstrokes that comprise each sunflower dotted along the sky blue ceramic. She traces each petal with her finger, it gives her hands something to do other than shake. It gives her mind something to do other than think. It gives the wraith—  Seven. There are seven sunflowers on this pot. Bobby had given Zoey this pot. Zoey had trusted Mira with this pot. I am Mira.

An unwelcome yet familiar sensation graces her fingertips. It slithers up her arms like a pair of eels and it pools itself in her gut like a heavy stone. 

Mira’s eyes refocus, she looks down at the pot in her lap. Ash, she’s smeared ash all over Zoey’s pot. Her wrists burn anew. I am Mira and I ruin everything, the wraith she thinks. Something hot builds up behind her eyes as the scent of ash works its way through her system. She screws her eyes shut. Ice claws its way up her throat. For one horrific moment she wonders if her neck has been reopened.

Warm fingers brush against her bicep, chipping at the ice. 

“Did you know kangaroos can’t go backwards?!” Zoey blurts.

Mira twists in the front seat to look at her incredulously. Zoey has her eyes fixed on the road, hands at ten-and-two, an expression of utter mortification on her face.

“They can’t?” Mira asks as the ice in her throat rapidly thaws. Satisfaction and warmth kindle in Mira’s chest as Zoey’s mortification falls away. “Nope!” Zoey says, her fingers tapping out a rhythm on the steering wheel. (Mira absently notes that it’s one of her ‘happy rhythms.’) “It’s mainly because of the tail.”  

“Huh!” “Pretty cool, right?” “Sick,” Mira agrees. “Do you have any more cool animal facts?”

Zoey’s eyes sparkle and the rest of the drive passes in the whirl of an impromptu lecture on the nature of turtle shells. Mira lets the wraith drown under the sound of Zoey’s voice and the sparkle in her eyes.  Zoey believes I can keep this pot safe. That is why she gave it to me. She trusts me.  Idly Mira examines the pot again. The ash streaks have only made the yellow of the flowers stand out all the brighter. 

“Imonim,” Rumi says softly, touching her arm.

The title doesn’t quite add up until she turns to see Hyeonsuk approaching them, a jacket on over her scrubs and a bag over her shoulder, smiling tearfully as she talks into her phone. “Yeah, yeah, Sieun, she’s right here, I’ve got her, here—“

Minji takes the phone, and finds herself unable to breathe. Sieun. Sieun, her best friend, her Sieun. Dead Sieun.

There’s a ragged sound from the other end. Then: “Minji?”

“Hello,” Minji says, because that is what you say when you answer the phone, and a boulder like her will always follow its path.

(Sieun. Her best friend. Alive Sieun.)

“Minji,” Sieun gasps, “Minji, babe, I thought—you didn’t—what the hell? Where have you been?”

Minji stands, feeling so much as to be numb and silent, until Hyeonsuk takes her arm and starts to lead her and Rumi towards her car.

It shocks an answer from her, it seems. “Miyeong’s.”

Sieun laughs, wild and hysterical, and Minji smiles on autopilot, because Sieun’s reactions have long been her guide when she’s lost. And yet…

“I’m sorry,” she says. “I should’ve been there.”

Sieun deserves her honesty. Sieun can always take her honesty.

Hyeonsuk misses a step, and Minji nearly walks into her back. Oh. They’re at the car.

Rumi frowns heavily, some unreadable emotion underneath it as she reaches down to where Minji has, without noticing, dug her nails in and takes her hand, squeezing in slow, rhythmic pulses.

“…Please,” Sieun says, “tell me that you mean after. Because, Minji, the only damn thing keeping me together this last month is the fact that I might get to have this conversation. Don’t you dare tell me you’re sorry for finally figuring things out with Miyeong instead of—instead of—instead of dying of smoke inhalation.”

Minji cannot answer her. Sieun deserves her honesty.

Sieun takes a sharp breath. She lets it out, controlled, and takes another. “Okay. So when Hyeonsuk gets you here, I’m going to hug you. And neither of us are going to feel guilty for surviving.”

Minji squeezes back in time with Rumi’s rhythm, trying desperately to anchor herself as she stares at Hyeonsuk’s car.

“I have lost too many people to lose you too,” she says. “Don’t you dare say no, Minji. Don’t you dare.”

“Okay,” Minji says. “Miyeong’s in surgery right now. I should leave a message, though.”

Miyeong's not entirely sure how to answer that. She wouldn't have talked to Jeremy outside of work; they didn't have much in common, didn't like to spend their free time the same way. But they were friendly enough on the job, were always able to hold a conversation, knew how to get each other the angles or access they needed without having to ask.

"… well enough that I would have said he was a decent person," she finally says, because that's the real problem, isn't it? "He said— maybe it was stupid, but I asked him, during the fight, what deal he made. He said it was to protect him from bullies. Does that mean university? Grade school? Can a— how can a dumb kid make a deal with Gwi-Ma, how is that—"

Celine's thumb traces along the back of Miyeong's knuckles, a soothing, wordless acknowledgment. "A contract with the demon king can be broken, while one still lives. It isn't easy, or entirely safe for the advocate, but if your friend had regretted a path chosen in foolish adolescence, he could have stepped off it as an adult."

"How… could he not have? How could—"

Maybe it's the opiates or the adrenaline crash or maybe it's just Celine, sitting there with her hand wrapped around Miyeong's with all the patience in the world and not a single shred of judgement, but somehow, for once, it feels easy to say.

"I know bad people," Miyeong admits, picking at a bit of fuzz on the pilled-up fleece blanket the last nurse gave her, "from way too close up. I've done the whole dance, the makeup and the excuses and the giving up friends, I know what it looks like when nothing is as important to someone as himself. And I don't know, maybe Jeremy had some secret dark side, but Yeonggi— I know what Minji has probably said about him, and I won't pretend he didn't make some bad choices, but he wasn't evil, Celine. He wasn't the kind of person who sees 'summon a demon to the world to torture everyone forever' and shouts 'hey, sign me up!'"

Celine takes a moment, picking her words with extra care even by Celine standards, and says, "Gwi-Ma is a deceiver. Very few start their service to him with a clear vision of the end. But it doesn't take a particularly cruel man, either, to stay there, even once the end is all too visible. To justify only a little more cruelty, when you've come so far, when it's only happening to someone else." Her thumb soothes over Miyeong's knuckles again. "You could put it in psychology terms; sunk cost fallacy, moral acclimation. But in my order we simply say that every bad choice is practice for the next."

"… I don't think I care for that adage," admits Miyeong. "I've made a lot of bad choices of my own."

Celine just smiles at her, unjustifiably, impossibly fond. "The inverse is no less accurate; every good choice is practice, too. Which would you consider sheltering us, the last few weeks? Walking into deadly danger for the sake of friends? Choosing Minji?"

I have not read the entirety of Batgirl yet, but if it doesn't have Cass cussing David out, I'm suing dc

It makes me feel anger because it gives a comparison for just how summarized the rest of the Silmarillion is. The entire fall of the Noldor, written in a way that condenses Frodo and Sam’s whole journey to “alone with his servant he passed through peril and darkness and came at last in Sauron’s despite even to Mount Doom”.

What else did Tolkien imagine over five hundred years of history that didn’t make it into any of his notes? What did he not imagine that still must have occurred? Who are the Boromirs and the Eowyns and the Bilbos of the first age? What witch-kings did they slay and what quests did they begin? What were the riddles and the detours and the love stories?

their big eggs are actually that size for a similar reason to human babies having massive heads!! being bigger at birth can be important.

kiwi are trying SO HARD to become mammals. fur-like feathers, whisker-like feathers, little beady eyes, nocturnal, great sense of smell.... that's basically a mammal!! they're well suited for life on the forest floor.

their big eggs work alongside these adaptations to give them a leg up in the bird world. their young hatch already feathered! they're precocial, which means they're born with the ability to open their eyes and move around. like foals.

big egg = more powerful offspring from the get-go. babies don't need to spend precious time vulnerable while they develop on the ground when they've already done all that in the egg!

Gladly!

A bit more complicated, but sure!