I might be big and not as smart as the other guys-

“THE MURRAY IS AS BEAUTIFUL AS HE IS HANDSOME!! GENDER ROLES DON’T APPLY TO THE MURRAY!”

“YOU ARE YOUR OWN BEST FRIEND. YOU GOTTA TREAT YOURSELF LIKE YOU WOULD TREAT YOUR BEST FRIEND. LOOK AT ME! I’M GREAT!”

“MONSTER TRUCK RALLYS!!! DEMOLITION DERBYS!!! BUSTIN’ A GUY IN THE CHOPS FOR HARASSING PEOPLE!!! EATING FOOD!! MAKEOVERS!! MOVIES!!! THE THRILL OF ADVENTURE IN YOUR BLOOD AS YOU DRIVE THE GETAWAY VAN AFTER A HUGE HEIST!!! THATS. WHAT’S FUN!” 

“-Almost as not funny as making fun of yourself which lowers your self esteem and self worth.”

“I don’t get it.”

me: has barely to no ships here me: ok but ship where murray falls for a super sweet animal that’s like teeny compared to him THE HEIGHT DIFFERENCE, IM WEAK MAN

“Of course, Sly! Anytime! Anywhere! Anything for you! All ya’ gotta do is ask, and THE MURRAY will deliver!”

Murray is the emotional core of the cooper gang and i will die on this hill

“I mean. If you want??? I’m just a guru!”

“WHAT’RE YOU TALKING ABOUT?! LOVE ISN’T OVERRATED! LOVE IS THE BEST! I LOVE MYSELF AND MY BROTHERS AND MY FRIENDS MORE THAN ANYTHING! SURE, WORKING’S FINE OR WHATEVER- BUT IT CAN’T GIVE YOU THE WARM FUZZIES LIKE SOMEONE YOU CARE ABOUT!”

Murray: NOPE!