Oh Brother!

the coding squad are all extreme workaholics and when they’re deep in a project they tend to hyperfixate on it so hard that they literally forget about everything and anything else.

i also love the idea of them becoming A Lot More Friendly post-BAYD. like obv Ruby and Froghorn are still gonna be clashing horns like crazy but now it’s less ‘I Want To Literally Murder You In A Dark Alleyway Let’s Go’ and more like vitriolic best buds.

froghorn chugs down coffee to keep himself running. one time ruby’s like ‘god i’m so tired and i have like six tests tomorrow how am i even gonna DO this’ and he’s like ‘here try some of this’ and offers his death brew of a coffee blend to which blacker immediately yells ‘NO’ at the top of his lungs and practically sprints across the room to prevent it from happening because ruby is TINY and her body cannot handle that much pure caffeine

and speaking of which coding squad is autistic squad i do not make the rules. 

ruby knows a lot of people in spectrum because she spends a lot of time wandering around where she shouldn’t be. this means that sometimes she ends up helping them out with stuff, and it also means that a lot of people owe her favors. these favors always end up being stuff like ‘okay so you’re my alibi, and you can NOT tell hitch i was back here’

dumb office games, all the time. like Travelling Lemon, in which one person hides an ordinary, plain lemon in plain sight and another person has to find it and rehide it without anyone noticing. this is harder than it sounds. it is also just as stupidly competitive as it sounds

lb: why does this month’s budget have nearly $400 allocated to ‘’’beanbag necessities’’’ blacker: we’re having an office sleepover next week lb: hmm blacker: you’re invited if you want to come lb: HM!

ruby, blacker and froghorn all have dreadful habits of talking to themselves when they think they’re alone. when anyone walks in on them holding Animated Detailed Conversations with themselves they are all inevitably like [LOUD CAT HISS] [jumps a mile in the air] - you know how it is

kekoa can benchpress ruby. the sequence of events leading to them finding this out are very complicated but ruby is fucking DELIGHTED every time she does it

one time the Coding Squad goes out for lunch or something in downtown Twinford and they’re having a p good time chatting and eating and then one of Ruby’s school friends (del, prolly) shows up like ‘hey ruby! :D oh hey who are these people?’

Ruby: They're my, uh. Ruby, mentally blanking: dads Blacker, at the same time: uncles

Del: are you lying to me, Redfort? Ruby: WHAT NO Froghorn, at the same time: absolutely Del: Uh huh

you’d assume that would be the end of that except it keeps happening because everybody lives in twinford and it’s kind of inevitable that they’d end up meeting each other in non-work environments and well they’re her friends ruby isn’t just NOT going to stop and say hi 

she and Kip Holbrook are out investigating a thing, Mouse is there, Ruby forgets that friends exist but instead she’s like UHHH HE’S MY ADOPTED BROTHER. kekoa is now her long-suffering aunt. SJ is absolutely delighted to be her cousin. the lies keep spreading and they never end. 

everyone knows that hitch is basically her adoptive dad by now tho that was never in question

it comes to a head when ruby bumps into LB in the park at one point and is making awkward smalltalk and elliot rolls up and goes ‘oh hey you must be another one of ruby’s extended family we don’t know about’ and ruby’s just about got the hang of this at last. she’s completely prepared to go all ‘listen we don’t even LOOK alike maybe we just know each other! maybe she’s just mom’s friend from work or something!’ 

but LB immediately, without even so much as missing a beat, goes, ‘yes, it’s always lovely to see my favorite niece. she never calls as much as she should’

eventually they end up having a mock family reunion. it’s mainly just to make fun of ruby for how bad she is at lying about completely mundane things. 

So, I’m going to collect information about him from the books that I think is either most definitely true or could possibly be true. Any other information I’ll discount as a lie or impossible to tell if it’s true, and I won’t write it down. Reminder that I don’t own books 2 or 3 and there are spoilers! below. Let’s begin!

every smart kid’s smart kid

(Note: I am missing books 2 & 3 because I refuse to buy anything but hardback RR books, and there are other requirements because I’m a picky girl… so could someone else check those???)

Anyway, let’s begin today’s episode of Information about Blacker! Spoilers, maybe? Err on the side of caution!

Ruby, sleepy from being drugged and tied up by the Count: God? Is that you?

Hitch: what??!

Let’s try break down the timeline of the Ruby Redfort/Spectrum “universe” prior to Ruby being an agent.

We begin knowing some basic information about some of our agent’s ages and here’s where the spoilers! begin:

Ruby, exited: I can?

LB: no, that's not what I meant -