the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability

i recently experienced some pretty severe transphobic abuse in my workplace (children’s home) that included having food thrown at me, being called slurs, being told i was a pervert because i am trans. one of the managers talked with me afterwards and shared that he had had a similar experience as an Asian man. this wasn’t him derailing my experience, or talking over me, or making things about himself. he was communicating “hey, i know how it feels and how much it sucks. you’re not alone.”

THAT is what solidarity IS. i don’t know what it’s like to be Asian, he doesnt know what it’s like to be trans, but we both had a similar experience and we were able to turn a horrible experience into an opportunity for bonding and comfort.

“I’m probably not saying that correctly”/“sorry for my pronunciation” = 👍 understandable! foreign languages often have sounds that aren’t used in English and learning to correctly pronounce unfamiliar phonemes is genuinely difficult even with help

“lol I’m not even gonna TRY to pronounce that 😂” = 👎 THIS is the problem, if treats languages other than English like they are inherently ‘weird’ or ‘overly complicated’ just because you aren’t familiar with them

miraculously it has been 24 hours since I made that post and that woman has not only not died from being called racist, she has had time to complain about being called racist while misrepresenting my words! let's discuss!

I made a post calling this woman racist - not a nazi, mind you, a word with a very specific meaning, I called her racist - because she looked at a black trans woman and told her to her face that racist white trans woman have human reasons for being racist and she should shut up, because racism is whatever while calling racist white trans women racist will get them killed.

my blog is for black women and black queer and trans people. whatever anyone else thinks about my blog is something I do not give a fuck about.

can you see the obfuscation here by making it about "uuuhh they're calling me a NAZI" (I have not) and not saying a peep about my focus on her antiblackness? her very real antiblackness of telling a black trans woman "well talking about their racism isnt going to do anything so if you aren't willing to mammy yourself up and deprogram their racism you're just getting racist whites killed by kiwifarms"? it's almost as if racist white trans women do not give a fuck about women of colour unless they can be held up as meat shields against discrimination! it's almost as if it's transfeminism until that transfeminism involves black trans women!

"if you accuse a trans woman of anything I will simply not believe you. by accusing a trans woman of literally anything you will get her harassed by transphobes and that is your fault. and also even if she did the thing by talking about it you're not doing anything about it so it's useless and I hate you."

"what if she's racist? I am a black trans woman and many white trans women are racist."

"you see oversensitive darkie this is exactly why I posted this. she probably has a very human and normal and understandable reason to actively be racist, which is normal for racist people. you can't help if she's racist. unless you are willing to personally put in the work to deprogram her racism why would you want to talk about her being racist? who gave you the authority to do that? what's that? this is actively harmful to you and other people she is being racist to? too bad. by talking about it to warn people or anything kiwifarms will kill her."