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Sometimes I need a break. From everything and everyone and this so called life. Sometimes I need to let myself feel down so I can rest

I thought these things were meant to go away. I truly convinced myself I was just over reacting cus I was a teen and teenagers love to make a bit of drama to keep things going. But you know what? Fuck that. I got into university, I grew up and every fucking day I look at my scars and have to hold myself back from adding a couple more. Getting cured is bullshit. Everyday is a struggle. Once you let self harm become a routine in your life, you can go ages without harming yourself and it's still there, still knocking on your head everytime things aren't extremely fine, nothing bad needs to happen and there it is, shinning to you, asking you why the fuck did you quit something that felt so nice.