unimpressed & underwhelmed

I miss our routines

I miss our favourite spots

I miss our movie dates

I have so much to tell you

lots I just wanna run by you

you've always been my favorite life advisor

I'm afraid I'd just bother you

but I miss my best friend

a lot

always find myself wanting to tell you something.

to head your voice.

I'm saddest because I can't share things with you.

I miss you.

I'm unsure if I miss the version of you I somewhat deluded myself into believing you were

or if I miss you.

but it hurts just the same.

whenever something happens I want to share, it's an empty ache.

you should be here

why aren't you here?

I hate missing you

I hate that we got to this point

I hate that you hurt me the way you did

I hate all of this.

and then I remember how everything else hurt.

I miss being enveloped by you

I miss exhaling in your chest.

I don't miss the times I questioned myself.

my sanity.

my worth.

my love.

sometimes I can't breathe

I'm unsure anyone would ever understand me, fully

so I don't say anything.