How Tech will come back (according to my husband and daughter)
Lord help me I have the nerdiest damn family, watch oldest has a 40k themed wedding wouldn't her dork daddy beam from joy right there.
So, no one dies in Star Wars. I know it, you know it, the American people know it.
And Moff Gideon, years down the line, has a whole bunch of clones ready to go, right?
So it's clear that Space Mengele Dr Hemlock knows how to grow humans. He will clearly scrape off Tech's remains from the cable car and regrow him.
But he has the intellect of Tech, without the memories.
Somehow he gets out of Tantiss, because where is he? What would a new clone of Tech do?
WORK IN IT OR ACCOUNTING OR POSSIBLY BOTH.
He'd be cramming spreadsheets or typing up a memo or emailing someone asking DID YOU TRY TURNING IT OFF AND ON AGAIN when Tantiss goes all kablooey. He's smart and knows where the exits are. So he survives.
Meanwhile Tarkin sees him still working on his data pad amidst the destruction. An imperial tech (lol) who can work all cool headed while explosions are going off?! GET HIM ON PAYROLL, NOW!
Cue Tech being that bland guy from corporate who comes around the different offices to get crap in order lest Tarkin throw a hissy fit. That's where they find all the money for the Death Star.
Anywho, eventually he ends up working in Jabba's palace as Jabba's accountant/IT guy, because criminals pay better than the government. Hey, someone has to work payroll and figure out how much that rancor is costing us.
Tech always looks at the rancor and feels weird, like, didn't he rescue that thing at one point.
Once again, he's in the back doing taxes when Jabba et al deal with Han Solo and all his goofy friends. No one is willing to kill him or bother him, because we all owe money to the space IRS.
Boba Fett eventually takes over, and as daimyo, wonders who the hell is going to help him with running the thing. Looks in the back, there's an old clone typing away. Looks up with his goggles. Decides to find Boba Fett's sister, Omega.
They all have a reunion. Fennec Shand avoids eye contact with them because Reasons.
(We need both Tales from Jabba's Palace and Tech being The Imperial Taxman is the funniest thing)
