I taste death in every kiss we share

Farouk stood patiently, having managed to arrange a special little dream for his former host, arms crossed as he waited for the other to finally appear. True it may not have been the best possible way to let Ryou know of his return, however he was never a very patient individual to begin with and the torment of being separated from his lighter half was already too much.

Red eyes shifted as he spotted a familiar figure, looking somewhat confused where they stood, and he couldn't stop the low chuckle that left him upon seeing the person he'd been waiting for in this familiar bedroom.

But the spirit hated him hadn’t he? He had never wanted anything more than to use him, which made Ryou feel entirely pathetic to long for someone who could never care for him.

But he would never know who that man was without Zorc would he?

He picked absentmindedly at the new scar on his hand left behind from the deal he had struck with Zorc behind the Spirit’s back. Ultimately it hadn’t been necessary yet he felt trapped. Condemned to this loneliness as he nearly was to the ring.

When he awoke into a dream he wasn’t immediately aware it was a dream. It seemed normal enough, until something about the way the shadows lay made him realize a marginal difference that indicated this wasn’t exactly right and perhaps something terrifying would occur.

When he stood the disorientation shifted. As his gaze met red, his heart quickened with fear… and desire. He’d never expected to see him again. This wasn’t real. This was a dream.

And if it was a dream it had no repercussions. So he approached him.

This wasn’t real therefore he could kiss him without any embarrassment or danger. He couldn’t hurt him. And he wouldn’t really know his abnormal feelings toward him. There was freedom in dreams.

After several seconds, he pulled away and looked down upon Ryou with a soft chuckle.

"That was a much nicer greeting than I expected, but I think you'd be a bit more satisfied if you were able to do this for real, wouldn't you?" He murmured, brushing a few loose strands from his former host's face.

"You should wake up, Respectable Landlord. I'm waiting patiently for you. Besides, it's time for you to get up, it's already late morning." Farouk offered a smile and stepped back from Ryou, beginning to allow the dream to begin fading. Arms crossing over his chest, he smiled.

He didn’t want to wake up to the heart ache of a purposeless, forsaken existence. “No… please…” His voice cracked, chest tight. But the man was right; the dream was losing its definition.

Wintry sunlight found its way through gaps between and around curtains. Ryou rolled away from it onto his side, eyes closed a while longer as he thought on what he had dreamt.

And what he had lost all over again.

Ryou felt for his phone somewhere in his blankets. Checked the time. Skimmed his notifications. Cleared them out, ignoring Yugi and Anzu and Marik. Well, maybe he did need to talk to Marik later. He felt like he was being watched, and Marik knew paranoia well among his plethora of mental illness troubles.

CHANGE OF HEART

Farouk stood patiently, having managed to arrange a special little dream for his former host, arms crossed as he waited for the other to finally appear. True it may not have been the best possible way to let Ryou know of his return, however he was never a very patient individual to begin with and the torment of being separated from his lighter half was already too much.

Red eyes shifted as he spotted a familiar figure, looking somewhat confused where they stood, and he couldn't stop the low chuckle that left him upon seeing the person he'd been waiting for in this familiar bedroom.

But the spirit hated him hadn’t he? He had never wanted anything more than to use him, which made Ryou feel entirely pathetic to long for someone who could never care for him.

But he would never know who that man was without Zorc would he?

He picked absentmindedly at the new scar on his hand left behind from the deal he had struck with Zorc behind the Spirit’s back. Ultimately it hadn’t been necessary yet he felt trapped. Condemned to this loneliness as he nearly was to the ring.

When he awoke into a dream he wasn’t immediately aware it was a dream. It seemed normal enough, until something about the way the shadows lay made him realize a marginal difference that indicated this wasn’t exactly right and perhaps something terrifying would occur.

When he stood the disorientation shifted. As his gaze met red, his heart quickened with fear… and desire. He’d never expected to see him again. This wasn’t real. This was a dream.

And if it was a dream it had no repercussions. So he approached him.

This wasn’t real therefore he could kiss him without any embarrassment or danger. He couldn’t hurt him. And he wouldn’t really know his abnormal feelings toward him. There was freedom in dreams.

“Uh, I guess. I’m glad you’re not possessed anymore?”

bariankura​:

teaandwitchery​:

bariankura​:

teaandwitchery​:

bariankura​:

So it was on purpose after all. But the fact that it had actually worked had been just luck. Surely Ryou didn’t know anything about interdimensional doors, right? Unless that book he had had something about them too.

“Yes. And there was nothing more. Though, your body was nice”, he admitted. He started to understand. The other had been lonely. But didn’t he have friends? He was lonely in his own body?

“I could still enter into your body and take it over”, he told. “But I don’t have a much need for that since I have my own body know. As you can see”, he added when the boy touched his face. Possibly to see if he was a ghost or something.

His eyes widened. This was fascinating; how could he touch him? So it wasn’t his imagination that the thief king had manifested with such clarity.

“Oh. Oh, wow.” he murmured. For a breath longer he touched him, hand brushing his hair when he retracted it.

Ryou really was useless now. He wasn’t sure if he would laugh at it or cry.

The sound that escaped him was somewhere in between before he pulled himself back together as well as he could manage.

He was going to feel like this for the rest of his life.

Maybe Marik could help him.

He could see how impressed the boy was. And he was sure he was impressed how good he looked. “At least you have a good taste”, he commented.

The sound he heard was weird. Was the other going laugh or cry? Or both? The boy’s feelings still confused him.

“Maybe I should stay here while I’m on Earth”, he suggested. “Truth to be told I need a human. Be it brainwashed one or you. What do you say? Join me once more?”

“Your presence… is more of a home than I’ve known.” Ryou told him. And who would ever know him so truly as the thief king? It felt so useless to try to take control of his life. He didn’t know how.

“I’m yours.”

No truer words had ever touched his lips.

“Excellent”, he grinned. “I guess it wasn’t that using I did to you. It seems that I also stole your heart so to speak. Funny how that works”, he chuckled.

“So here’s the thing. I come from a world of chaos, the Barian World. The Barian World is in war with Astral World. In order to win we need to find “Numbers” cards. It’s easier if you can use Numbers yourself. Unfortunately, I can’t because I can’t use my full power here because this world can’t support my true form”, he explained.

Wearily Ryou refilled his wine glass, drinking as he listened and gazed upon the beautiful, wicked man. It was absurd! A world of chaos? “What cards? Are we talking about duel monsters?” he inquired. He moved to find his phone on his bed, googling the word barian. Minerals? It was only getting more confusing. But cards he could understand.

bariankura​:

teaandwitchery​:

bariankura​:

So it was on purpose after all. But the fact that it had actually worked had been just luck. Surely Ryou didn’t know anything about interdimensional doors, right? Unless that book he had had something about them too.

“Yes. And there was nothing more. Though, your body was nice”, he admitted. He started to understand. The other had been lonely. But didn’t he have friends? He was lonely in his own body?

“I could still enter into your body and take it over”, he told. “But I don’t have a much need for that since I have my own body know. As you can see”, he added when the boy touched his face. Possibly to see if he was a ghost or something.

His eyes widened. This was fascinating; how could he touch him? So it wasn’t his imagination that the thief king had manifested with such clarity.

“Oh. Oh, wow.” he murmured. For a breath longer he touched him, hand brushing his hair when he retracted it.

Ryou really was useless now. He wasn’t sure if he would laugh at it or cry.

The sound that escaped him was somewhere in between before he pulled himself back together as well as he could manage.

He was going to feel like this for the rest of his life.

Maybe Marik could help him.

He could see how impressed the boy was. And he was sure he was impressed how good he looked. “At least you have a good taste”, he commented.

The sound he heard was weird. Was the other going laugh or cry? Or both? The boy’s feelings still confused him.

“Maybe I should stay here while I’m on Earth”, he suggested. “Truth to be told I need a human. Be it brainwashed one or you. What do you say? Join me once more?”

“Your presence… is more of a home than I’ve known.” Ryou told him. And who would ever know him so truly as the thief king? It felt so useless to try to take control of his life. He didn’t know how.

“I’m yours.”

No truer words had ever touched his lips.

“Excellent”, he grinned. “I guess it wasn’t that using I did to you. It seems that I also stole your heart so to speak. Funny how that works”, he chuckled.

bariankura​:

So it was on purpose after all. But the fact that it had actually worked had been just luck. Surely Ryou didn’t know anything about interdimensional doors, right? Unless that book he had had something about them too.

“Yes. And there was nothing more. Though, your body was nice”, he admitted. He started to understand. The other had been lonely. But didn’t he have friends? He was lonely in his own body?

“I could still enter into your body and take it over”, he told. “But I don’t have a much need for that since I have my own body know. As you can see”, he added when the boy touched his face. Possibly to see if he was a ghost or something.

His eyes widened. This was fascinating; how could he touch him? So it wasn’t his imagination that the thief king had manifested with such clarity.

“Oh. Oh, wow.” he murmured. For a breath longer he touched him, hand brushing his hair when he retracted it.

Ryou really was useless now. He wasn’t sure if he would laugh at it or cry.

The sound that escaped him was somewhere in between before he pulled himself back together as well as he could manage.

He was going to feel like this for the rest of his life.

Maybe Marik could help him.

He could see how impressed the boy was. And he was sure he was impressed how good he looked. “At least you have a good taste”, he commented.

The sound he heard was weird. Was the other going laugh or cry? Or both? The boy’s feelings still confused him.

“I’m yours.”

bariankura​:

teaandwitchery​:

bariankura​:

That made sense. Ryou had always been interested in stuff like that. Finding a spell book wouldn’t be that off. He took a sip of the wine. It felt good to be back to his original form. Even if it was only skin-deep.

“You need me? Why?” he questioned. He had always thought his host didn’t like him. “I thought you hated me”, he said.

And yet now it looked like the boy had tried to summon him on purpose. And had succeeded. Even if it wasn’t exactly what he had expected.

“Yes. I hate you.” A soft smile was at odds with his words and the sadness he didn’t have the energy to hide. “You ruined my life without a care. Then you left me… Left me to a singular existence I couldn’t remember having, because you’ve been there so long. An unfamiliar, unrelenting emptiness. You left me with nothing at all when I don’t know who I am without you.”

Jonouchi could never understand. Nor Anzu. Nor Tristan. Not even Yugi, even if he claimed otherwise. It wasn’t the same. The gods had given him Atem. It wasn’t the same.

Ryou knew he shouldn’t want him back. He knew he was being self-destructive (if he acknowledged it, did that mean he wasn’t insane?) at best and suicidal at worst.

Anything was better than this. “But it’s what I wanted for years, wasn’t it? To be free of you? Then why do I feel like this? What did you really do to me?”

So his assumption had been correct. The boy really hated him. “So you are telling me you weren’t trying to summon me and I just happened to come here by accident?”

But then when the other continued it turned out he was lonely. The situation was also confusing to the thief. Did the boy want him or not? Should he just leave and do what he’s supposed to?

But then again, it also didn’t seem like his ex-host would chase him away. He doesn’t seem to mind him being here now.

“Nothing really. I just used your body and that’s it. And yet you still aren’t happy that you are free from me? That is unless I want to use you again”, he added.

“I did summon you.” Ryou stated. It was so difficult to explain his misery and what he longed for out of this. And why. “To be used…” his heart sunk yet RACED. “It’s all I know, isn’t it? And there is comfort in familiarity…”

Oh he should be deeply ashamed… instead his desire to be of use amplified.

“Without you inside me… I’m awfully hollow.” he whispered.

Maybe the truth was he didn’t deserve someone like Atem. Only someone like this.

He rubbed at emerging tears before extending a hand toward the thief king’s face, gaze raking down the scar across his face.

So it was on purpose after all. But the fact that it had actually worked had been just luck. Surely Ryou didn’t know anything about interdimensional doors, right? Unless that book he had had something about them too.

“Yes. And there was nothing more. Though, your body was nice”, he admitted. He started to understand. The other had been lonely. But didn’t he have friends? He was lonely in his own body?

“Oh. Oh, wow.” he murmured. For a breath longer he touched him, hand brushing his hair when he retracted it.

Ryou really was useless now. He wasn’t sure if he would laugh at it or cry.

The sound that escaped him was somewhere in between before he pulled himself back together as well as he could manage.

He was going to feel like this for the rest of his life.

bariankura​:

That made sense. Ryou had always been interested in stuff like that. Finding a spell book wouldn’t be that off. He took a sip of the wine. It felt good to be back to his original form. Even if it was only skin-deep.

“You need me? Why?” he questioned. He had always thought his host didn’t like him. “I thought you hated me”, he said.

And yet now it looked like the boy had tried to summon him on purpose. And had succeeded. Even if it wasn’t exactly what he had expected.

“Yes. I hate you.” A soft smile was at odds with his words and the sadness he didn’t have the energy to hide. “You ruined my life without a care. Then you left me… Left me to a singular existence I couldn’t remember having, because you’ve been there so long. An unfamiliar, unrelenting emptiness. You left me with nothing at all when I don’t know who I am without you.”

Jonouchi could never understand. Nor Anzu. Nor Tristan. Not even Yugi, even if he claimed otherwise. It wasn’t the same. The gods had given him Atem. It wasn’t the same.

Ryou knew he shouldn’t want him back. He knew he was being self-destructive (if he acknowledged it, did that mean he wasn’t insane?) at best and suicidal at worst.

Anything was better than this. “But it’s what I wanted for years, wasn’t it? To be free of you? Then why do I feel like this? What did you really do to me?”

So his assumption had been correct. The boy really hated him. “So you are telling me you weren’t trying to summon me and I just happened to come here by accident?”

But then when the other continued it turned out he was lonely. The situation was also confusing to the thief. Did the boy want him or not? Should he just leave and do what he’s supposed to?

But then again, it also didn’t seem like his ex-host would chase him away. He doesn’t seem to mind him being here now.

Oh he should be deeply ashamed… instead his desire to be of use amplified.

“Without you inside me… I’m awfully hollow.” he whispered.

Maybe the truth was he didn’t deserve someone like Atem. Only someone like this.

bariankura​:

teaandwitchery​:

bariankura​:

@teaandwitchery​

“It’s been a while, ex-host.”

The masochistic thrill accelerated Ryou’s little occultist heart. He turned his gaze from tarot cards drawn over a blood smeared ouija board.

He knew he would find a way.

The candle light burning at his altar for spirit work illuminated elegantly his ghostly hair and those flames heightened with the spirit’s arrival.

“May I offer you a glass of wine?” He lit another candle and poured the drink. “Hotep emshabu en emenet her iabyt.” He set the Devil card on fire.

And Ryou slowly smiled.

Bakura had had noticed something was off so he had went to check it out. What he had found was that someone had managed to open an interdimensional door.

A glowing orange and white portal had opened to the young occultist’s place and a red, ghostly figure with purple eyes, horns and a long tail had appeared. But when it the figure stepped out of the portal it turned into a more familiar figure.

The former spirit looked around as the portal closed behind him. He looked at the altar and the blood smeared ouija board and the tarot cards.

“Honestly, if anyone besides a mad scientist managed to open a door to a different dimension it would have to be you”, he commented.

“Sure”, he shrugged at the offering of wine. He also paid attention to the prayer the other had said. “Since when have you done that?”

“Since I found a spell book and told Marik to read the pronunciations to me.” Ryou answered, looking the entity over. Seeing him again brought a greater array of emotions than he had expected. And he had expected it to be complicated.

Ryou would live not only with the trauma for the rest of his life but also with the persisting, obsessive doubt—the suspicion his friends secretly hated him. Why wouldn’t they?

“It had to happen. All of it.” Yugi had encouraged him. And yet… How fake were his friends’ smiles whenever Ryou approached them?

Life went on for them all. Except for him.

He felt so stagnant and alone. It felt wrong to be empty.

“I need you.”

That made sense. Ryou had always been interested in stuff like that. Finding a spell book wouldn’t be that off. He took a sip of the wine. It felt good to be back to his original form. Even if it was only skin-deep.

“You need me? Why?” he questioned. He had always thought his host didn’t like him. “I thought you hated me”, he said.

Jonouchi could never understand. Nor Anzu. Nor Tristan. Not even Yugi, even if he claimed otherwise. It wasn’t the same. The gods had given him Atem. It wasn’t the same.

Ryou knew he shouldn’t want him back. He knew he was being self-destructive (if he acknowledged it, did that mean he wasn’t insane?) at best and suicidal at worst.

bariankura​:

@teaandwitchery​

“It’s been a while, ex-host.”

The masochistic thrill accelerated Ryou’s little occultist heart. He turned his gaze from tarot cards drawn over a blood smeared ouija board.

He knew he would find a way.

The candle light burning at his altar for spirit work illuminated elegantly his ghostly hair and those flames heightened with the spirit’s arrival.

“May I offer you a glass of wine?” He lit another candle and poured the drink. “Hotep emshabu en emenet her iabyt.” He set the Devil card on fire.

And Ryou slowly smiled.

Bakura had had noticed something was off so he had went to check it out. What he had found was that someone had managed to open an interdimensional door.

A glowing orange and white portal had opened to the young occultist’s place and a red, ghostly figure with purple eyes, horns and a long tail had appeared. But when it the figure stepped out of the portal it turned into a more familiar figure.

The former spirit looked around as the portal closed behind him. He looked at the altar and the blood smeared ouija board and the tarot cards.

“Honestly, if anyone besides a mad scientist managed to open a door to a different dimension it would have to be you”, he commented.

Ryou would live not only with the trauma for the rest of his life but also with the persisting, obsessive doubt—the suspicion his friends secretly hated him. Why wouldn’t they?

“It had to happen. All of it.” Yugi had encouraged him. And yet… How fake were his friends’ smiles whenever Ryou approached them?

Life went on for them all. Except for him.

He felt so stagnant and alone. It felt wrong to be empty.