The apple tree

i am not dramatic—i am dissolving

Because failure is much more validating. Failure will pat you on the back and say, "maybe next time, hun", it will feed you anticipation and that flutter of trepidation in your chest when you think of success, it will make you feel comfortable in that bog you settled in.

The illusion of productivity keeps you in that mindset and prevents you from facing this fear. It keeps you feeling busy so you don't feel bad about being stagnant. It tells you you're walking in strides while you actually stand still, avoiding the discomfort of fully committing to success. Just like buying a dozen of fancy pens and notebooks instead of writing a book, you busy yourself with useless tasks that keep you from actually applying.

You can shift and manifest with just an intention and without any effort, but some of you are afraid of accepting even that. Just another script for my another DR, just another playlist with dozens of subliminals (do you even listen to them more than twice before creating a new one?), just another small "check" before a big manifestation, just another hour of reading through Tumblr/Pinterest/Reddit/TikTok posts and success stories, just another pile of photographed and screenshotted angel numbers. Are you not tired?

Shifting and manifesting are mundane and trivial to the point of being innate to you. If you have an apple in your hand, do you daydream about it? Do you create playlists named "🐁 🎀 𝐼 𝒽𝒶𝓋𝑒 𝒶𝓃 𝒶𝓅𝓅𝓁𝑒 🎀 🐁"? Do you buy a special knife that you proudly call "my apple knife"? Do you create moodboards for this apple? No, if you want an apple and you have it, you bite it.