heaven belongs to you

I know, just the reality of adult life and the jobs we choose that everything feels so hectic most of the time. I hope you mean the show and not like, my face! I’m joking, but I’m just glad it gave you an excuse to rewatch it. Its randomness aside, I made some amazing memories filming that. And I appreciate it, Tess! She’s definitely running around now and keeps me in shape, so there’s that! I’m glad to hear everything’s going well for you too, and that you’re finally getting in some relaxation! You work so much, you’ve earned it. And the family’s good, I take it? 

definitely the show, you know i could never have a bad thing to say about that face. i totally believe it, i bet it was a lot of fun to film. aw, that’s adorable! i expect some videos of you trying and failing to keep up with her at some point, because i have a feeling it’ll really give me a burst of serotonin. i know, i know, but i love working cause it gives me something to focus my brain on. when i have free time i totally don’t know what to do with myself and i get restless. trying to relax but turns out i’m extremely bad at it. family is definitely good, thank you for asking. anything exciting happening on your end?

i am? i mean i’m flattered, but also…. confused by that logic. whatever, i’ll take it! and also yes, to answer your question — i will absolutely hit one up with you. it’s the least i can do!

yeah, it’s you, hozier, and harry styles making up the club of honorary lesbians. okay, perfect, you and me have a date at the cubbyhole next time i’m in nyc. speaking of, how’s nyc? and you, and your little munchkins. tell me everything.

And I’m a leo so I’m pretty determined on making you work for it and I expect nothing but greatness, my love. But I just know that you will raise the bar with flying colors. Listen, if you’re here I’m going to cancel all my meetings just to see you and hear all the compliments you have in line for me.

ugh, you know i love a fire sign, that’s not fair. aw, would you really? i’m so flattered. i hope you really can clear your schedule next weekend, because we have some missed time to make up for.

janelle: giiiirl that felt GOOD. glad we can keep tormenting each other even when apart~

janelle: oh, you mean the gun that you not-so-subtly pelvic thrusted into? god, i'm weak.

tess: speaking of, where in the world are you? i miss that face a lot.

janelle: it ain't fair!

janelle: busy busy busy, as per usual. watched ragnarok again the other day, and the desire to have you step on me while wearing a cape was o u t s t a n d i n g 😂

tess: you know what's not fair? that photoshoot you just did for shape. forreal.

janelle: you really out here makin' eyes like that, huh? miss you 😘 been a hot minute.. how's things, beautiful?

tess: who, me? 👀

Of course I’ll make you work for it, I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t. This will be like delayed gratification for both of us. Doesn’t that sound good? I’m in LA, my love. Come and see me so you can give me those compliments while I look into your gorgeous eyes. 

you’re lucky i’m a libra and i never met a challenge i didn’t love. i’m pretty sure i’m going to be in LA in the next couple of weeks, so i hope you can pencil me into your busy schedule. i have a lot of compliments i’ve been saving fo the occasion.

oh babe, oh no, that’s… i feel guilty. i’d try to make it up to you by offering to be your wingman, but clearly… clearly that’s not gonna work out! unless we like, hit up a lesbian bar or something. you deserve better than being asked about me! i’m gonna make this right, swear on my life.

is this your official offer to come to a lesbian bar with me? because, please, let’s do that. did you know you’re a lesbian icon? on the internet, anyways, but i’m sure they’d be glad to see you. 

i know what you mean. i really haven’t seen a crab in real life. i’ve seen cooked crabs and i’ve seen them in pictures and in animated things, but never a real alive crab in real life. now i kinda want to go to the beach and see if i can find a crab. aw, really? thank you so much and i know exactly who you are cause i’m a huge fan too!

it’s the weirdest thing, right? never even thought about it until now. you wanna take a beach trip? we can both satisfy our curiosity. oh my gosh, you’re so nice, what an angel. how have you been?

No, it’s not your fault! I’ve been terrible at keeping up with things, and I’ll own it. I’ve missed you, though! And watching Hemlock Grove? That’s when you know it’s serious, Tess. Can I say I watched and rewatched Westworld for the same reason? Life’s good right now, though! Just trying to stay busy like always, you know me. All that between trying to keep up with the kiddo. But everything’s amazing and I can’t really complain. How about you, tell me everything that’s going on and how you’re doing!

i think we all are these days, it’s kind of a terrible consequence of adult life. combine that with usually being halfway across the world from everyone and it sucks even more. i know, i know, i just couldn’t help myself, it’s kind of like a really elaborate train wreck that you can’t look away from. you’re great on it though, as always. aw, really? i’m extremely flattered. how’s the little jellybean doing? have i missed any important milestones? glad to hear everything is going well, though. i’ve been doing good, honestly, just some much needed relaxing and visiting some family.

I don’t know, I think you’ll have to do something pretty special and better than getting drinks to get me to forgive you. You completely forgot about me - and my birthday. I don’t know how I feel about that. I won’t say no to the compliments though, so keep going. 

really gonna make me work for it, huh? alright, that’s fair. i’ll just have to go all out next time i’m in your neck of the woods and make it up to you. speaking of, where in the world are you? would love to be able to dish out those compliments face to face.

more than five?! is this… is this for personal or work-related reasons? if it’s personal, consider me a little alarmed. but alright, i’ll give it a go.. twelve? no. eight? it can’t be that many more than five, surely. 

i did include the work related reasons, but believe me, the personal ones outnumber them. it’s actually seven, but i wouldn’t be surprised if there were more on the horizon. you know how discouraging it is to spend an hour chatting with a girl at a bar for her to end up asking me how well i know you? that being said, if you ever need a blind date, you know who to call to set that up.