imagine being a criminal in gotham doing your criminal thing and it’s 2:45am and you see a shadow towering over you and you’re like yeah cool it’s batman i have a few new toys i bought off ebay that i’m pretty sure the joker was auctioning for 12p including shipping. and then you turn around and batman’s there alright, stupid bat ears and all, let’s see if this ends with you on gotham general’s porch or comically tied around a lamp post with a sticky note on your forehead for the police. but. you notice batman is smiling. even worse it’s not the bad creepy smile you’ve heard about, the one like he was asked by the school photographer to show some teeth for picture day before he unleashes some mortal kombat left arrow right arrow, up, up, A, A, B, left arrow moves. it’s a genuinely warm smile. friendly. naturally charming even. and you’re pretty sure that’s not how it works. what is going on mr. bat. did a superman enemy decide to play tourist again with poor gotham city after the scheduled wednesday metropolis kidnapping went without a hitch and now you’ve got some brainiac type of shapeshifter in your midst? could that be it?
and then Possibly Brainiac Batman cracks a joke and it’s kinda funny. if you told bob about it he’d laugh and bob never laughs so that means it’s legit. bob’s a dick. and then Could Be Brainiac Batman does a little whirl in the air before landing in front of you with a flourish. it’s kind of very good actually, there was no leg shaking at landing or anything. that’s impressive that takes some real skill. and it starts clicking. the grace. the poise. the talent. the panache. the lull in the air giving a taste of the entailing vexation of what you know is about to be one of most annoying fights of your life because this kid has never shut up in his life no matter what
anyway i think the dick grayson batman era was terrifying for a lot of people
