Talula Merriwether Mays

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These are some of my automatic drawings. I realized I haven’t talked about these much yet here.

Automatic drawing is a form of automatism, alongside other practices like automatic writing. The idea is that you turn off conscious decision-making, allowing the subconscious to have control of the direction of the drawing. The surrealists used it heavily in the 1920’s, and before that it was used in the work of mystics and artists like Hilma af Klint. It’s seen as a spiritual process by some, myself included.

To me, it feels like a clear and direct way to practice surrendering to the connection that guides me. I’m very interested in the place ideas come from. I have always been very particular about wanting to pursue the ideas that come from beyond my self, and seek to continuously tune the internal compass that allows me to discern where an idea comes from and what has been given through the spirit as opposed to what is contrived. Practicing automatic drawing over the past several years has helped me learn relinquish conscious control and to allow the subconscious to receive, which creates an interesting spiritual feedback loop. The more I surrender to it, the more I am shown. The same was true on the contrary - the more it was forced, the less I could see. I don’t do as many automatic drawings these days, but the time spent on them helped develop my approach tremendously.

These are of them I like most from the past few years.

I have fun seeing what shapes and symbols appear. I try not to notice if it looks like anything until I’m finished. Sometimes I squint my eyes while I’m drawing, just enough to make sure I can’t see my lines but still know where the paper is, and sometimes I look closely at an area I’ve already drawn, while my hand is busy with a different part of the page. Not looking at what the pen is doing helps me keep my conscious mind from interfering.

At first, I was a little resistant to the fact that houses and figures kept appearing. I think I had some idea that any coherence between the drawings meant I was imposing control on them, and was therefore “not doing it right”. This is why I don’t let myself look directly at what I’m drawing, I was catching myself in the act of repeating these shapes, and shifting the direction because I second guessed what I was doing. It isn’t easy to get the conscious part of my mind to settle down sometimes, and I would get caught in a loop of judging the lines the moment I made them. When I look away and don’t allow myself to pay attention or control the marks, it’s still house after house after house. I enjoy seeing them now.

I'm in a bit of a predicament (the stray cat I rescued evidently gave me worms), so I'm offering original one-of-a-kind automatic drawings, made to order. There are two ways to receive:

donate $5+ for a digital scan, $20+ to receive it in the mail, or $30+ to include a video of it being drawn (send to my cashapp, $TalulaMays, and message/email me to receive your drawing)

OR....

automatic drawings are also included with all other artwork purchases right now - leave a tip of $10+ at checkout and I will also send you a process video (see available work here)

Thank you for you assistance ! I hope to free from these worms soon.

Hello, my shop is open again for a short time.

I've been accepted into graduate school to get my masters in fine art, an opportunity that I've been working towards for seven years. I had to withdraw the first time I was accepted, and this second chance is such a blessing.

However, nearly all of my supplies are eight hundred miles away, and I will need them before the semester begins in two months. I'm raising money to get my art materials and tools that have been in a storage unit for two years.

If you would like to support the cause and help me get my studio equipment back, your support will help me out tremendously as I prepare for what’s to come!

feint / dissimulation / visage

air dry clay, wire, vellum, acrylic, chalk pastel

Do you like these? I will make you one of your very own, however you like. My commissions are open for a short time.

Yesterday was my birthday 🖤

Here are some photos that capture my essence: photographing an alleyway, smiling and feeling adventurous, getting ready with a fresh pair of homemade leg warmers, and holding a questionably haunted little doll from the thrift store

I took this with a soda can, during a pinhole photograph exercise at my local art center's photography club. This was a six minute exposure, on a day with very little wind. I love how many details were captured (uncropped version below)

what I searched for all along