I'm not sure why you're reading this letter. Maybe I'm not around anymore and this is your way of needing to remember me and what we had. I really hope that's not it. Maybe I've stopped telling you how much I love you because I've become a proper dick. I hope that's not it either. Actually, I hope you don't ever have to read this letter, and just go and ask me to tell you how much I love you, but oh well. I'll write it anyway.

When we first met, I wasn't really in the best place. Maybe I never told you that, but it's true. I was a little misguided and unsure of what I was doing. Of where I was going. I was thinking of leaving Hollywood, actually. Just getting out of that shithole and going back to live with my mom. I was seriously thinking about it when I met you, actually. It was so weird, you know? Like, here I was, about to leave my old world behind and find a new one, and here comes this blonde kid.

You turned my world upside down, Andy. I didn't think that some country boy would be able to change everything around, but you did. You ruined me. After our first date all I could think about was you and how I wanted to see you the next day. And the day after that. And I was starting to appreciate the little things about Hollywood that would remind me of you--like, if I drove by some woods, or if I ate Chinese food, you'd be with me. And then suddenly everything was Andy Lewis and I kept finding more and more reasons to stay in Hollywood. Work became fun. My apartment became fun. Every little place and object became... Worthwhile.

You changed everything.

I never expected to fall in love with you, but I did. Quickly and without warning. All I could do and all I can ever do is think about you and everything you mean to me. How you are everything to me. I love you more than I have ever loved someone. I'm pretty sure no one else is capable of loving anyone like I love you. Every breath I take, every feeling I have, every bone in my body aches for you. Even when you're right next to me I feel like I can't get enough of you. I never want to let you down, or hurt you, or let anyone hurt you. It seems futile, writing these words, because they can't even begin to explain how much I love you. It's terrifying and exhilarating and I never want to let go of this feeling. I never could. I promise I never could stop loving you. Even as you read this, and even if you feel like I don't anymore, I promise you. I will never, ever, ever stop loving you.