#ysage

New video Ft. y SAGE

Official music video for "Go Ghost" featuring Y Sage.

At dahil hindi ako nakapagspeech kahapon dahil feel na feel ko ang magmoment dahil sa hindi ko macontain yung emotions ko ng bonggang bongga. During the camp, i was unusually quiet and distant because I had a hard time processing everything and convincing myself that it was actually happening  and I knew that if i start to talk, i would burst out crying.

Three years ago, i was informed about a camp on gender issues and prostitution sa Sagada, and i was so excited, aside from the fact na dream place ko sya, talagang naintriga ako sa  title ng camp. I can still remember kung pano ako sumigaw nung nareceive ko yung text from Kuya Gerarld na  napili raw ako as one of the participants. Tapos yun nga, i went to Sagada na ang mindset ko ay char lang tong camp na to, but little did i know that very camp will change my life forever. If my memory serves me right, yung word na ginamit ko noon sa ritual part was “ENLIGHTENED”, coz after the camp, everything that were used to be vague to me, naging klaro lahat. The camp made me look at life in a different light and perspective. On my way home, i made a promise to myself that i will do everything para mashare sa iba yung mga natutunan ko.

So every time may invitation ang CATW-AP for upcoming camps i would sent out application forms hoping someone from UNP will be chosen para may kasama ako because i know it’ll be really hard for me to start my agendas and plans alone. But every time may napipili, they will eventually back out.  I had my fair shair of initiating forums and seminars on human rights and the likes but i would always end up yearning for something deeper, for my advocacy. But after 2 years parang wala paring nangyayari,nagsisimula nakong mafrustrate and i started to doubt myself . And everytime na napipili ako sa TOT and Reunion Camp ng YSAGE  I would ask myself why do i deserve this? why chose someone like me? Eh andami namang mas deserving , mas matalino, mas magaling magsalita mas malalim mag-isip at mas magaling na lider kesa sakin. Ano bang nakikita sakin nina Maam Jean at pinipili parin nila ako despite the fact na wala naman akong naipapakitang significant development sa Ilocos. i even came to a point na, naiiyak na ko sa frustration kasi  ilang taon na bakit wala paring nangyayari, i even told ate Liza about this after the reunion camp sa baguio. And she said, “Hindi,wag kang ganyan, darating din yung time nyo, Kaya mo yan, basta foucus lang at wag kang sumuko” and i found inspiration and on those words of Ate Liza. Then dumating yung time na CATW-AP were looking for young men naman, may mga napili pero  nagback out na naman ung iba at si Arnold lang ung natira. So lahat ng pang-uuto sinabi ko sa kanya. I even promised him that i’d treat him sa Max’s after the camp kaya ayun nga feel na feel naman nya pero nung on the way na siya sa Sagada at narealize nyang bangin na dinadaanan nila, nagtext siya, 5 parts—puro mura.haha, But I knew na in the end, after the camp, he will thank me for pushing him to go and none of my promises will matter. At ayun nga......... nagkamali pala ako, kasi pag-uwi nya gusto parin niya ng chicken ng Max’s. Haha

After non, eh di dalawa na kami ni Arnold, mas naging mas madali for both of us na ipursue ung mga plano naming for the provincial chapter. Pareho kaming sumumpa na hindi kami pwedeng grumadeyt ng hindi nabubuhay ang Ilocos Chapter. Some of friends would ask me why am i so passionate about the advocacy of gender equality, ano raw pinaghuhugutan ko at bakit ibang klase yung puso at dedication   ko para dito because they know for a fact that I rarely join organizations, moreover,    i was the “numero uno nega at nambabara ng mga officers, kung may mga activities i was like “ado la amin shet. I tend to focus and prioritize my studies more than anything. But YSAGE is a different story, it is more than an organization for me, pamilya ko na ang YSAGE. I found the love of a family in the arms of mommy jean and my sisters in the camp. 

At eto na nga! at long last! finally! may YSAGE Ilocos Chapter na!

Ok, first, I would like to extend my deepest and sincerest gratitude to Maam Jean and Sir Josh, for lending us their time, this wouldn’t be possible if not without  them. Dumami na naman pokaming mga anak nyo, this time mga echoserang ilokano naman.

Si Mommy Jean ung idol at inspiration ko, (aside from my mom) she never fails to amaze and make me cry everytime she talks about her advocacy. Sometimes i would like to ask her if she ever get tired of what she's doing but i know and i can see that she's not, and never will, for this is her love, her life, her calling, this is what makes her happy. and we love her more for that. she is the greatest and most wonderful person i've met. i may have known her for just 3 years but she became one of the most important persons in my life. Isa sya sa taong bumuo ng pagkatao ko, she thought me how to believe in myself when im at the lowest point of my life, she made me realize that im good and special enough to deserve a stand in this world. She believed in me like no one ever did before. Kumbaga siya ang star ng buhay ko. Naman!

Sir Josh was the kind father i never had and wish to have because he is the epitome of perfect and loving father. When he hugged me for the first time, i got quite and I asked myself when was the last time my father hugged me? Or did he actually ever hug me at all? I guess not....

To Joana and Ivy who came all the way from Nueva Ecija and Baguio just to be with us. Hindi ko alam kung paano matu2loy to without the help of my sister from another mother: dyosa joana kagandahan na may energyng walang kasing bonngga.

And finally napatunayan ko ulit na sobrang lakas ko Kay Lord, for without thy guidance and love none of these will happen.

This was just a dream that i once knew, i never thought this could possibly come true, chenes!  Yesterday super surreal pa yung feeling, i thought it was just another of my “Ysage Ilocos dream” and i was like “Lord, totoo ba to? Kung panaginip to gisingin mo na lang ako next century”.  Ngayon ko din talaga napatunayan na walang mataas na pangarap sa taong pursigido, after 3 long and struggling years, sa wakas, eto na, nagbunga na ung paghihirap namin ni Arnold, YSAGE_ ilocos, wow naman ang sarap pakinggan. Sana lang mga graduates, mga bagets isapuso nyo to, i hope this is not just a typical extra-curicualr activity sa inyo  or having another national certificate to add on your portfolio or an experience you’ll soon forget because it deserves more than that.  I know the camp touched your hearts and lives in the bittersweetest kind of way, like how it did to mine and the rest of the graduates of other camps not only in the country but all over the world. I have strong faith in you guys. I sincerely thank you for attending the camp and bearing all the misups, umulun nat bumaha go parin kayo, nakakalerki man si lola echoserang si madam benzon keri parin kayo- i mean tayo.

Among your long list of organizational involvement, take YSAGE as a different story, take it beyond the next level, coz we are no ordinary organization, were a family now, and like most family do, sama sama tayo sa pagsulong at pagtataguyod sa ikauunald ng pamilayng to, at sana ay patuloy tayong lumago, not only in quantity but in quality. And eventually, darating yung time na wala nang hindi tunay na ilokano at empowered ilokana not only in Ilocos Region but all over the world. And I know it will take a long bumpy ride but if we do it the right and YSAGE kinda’ way, we will definitely get there--with flying colors! J

WARNING: Pagbalik ko ng Ilocos at hindi ko kayo makita lahat sa meeting, magtago na kayo sa mga pinanggalingan nyo mga kapatid dahil hindi ko kayo tatantanan ng bonggang bongga. Sana pala gumawa tayo ng kontrata na ang hind magiging active sa family natin eh ibibitin sa may lagoon habang sumasayaw ng banana dance. :D