#your20s

I think I’ve been making a mistake by trying to date people without commitment. I mean I’ve always been a lover girl, my whole life. Ever since barbie 12 dancing princesses when I was 8. Ever since my mom wouldn’t want me to watch Demons and Angels because the premise of the series was a devil and an angel kissing (she’s muslim). I mean society has trained me for this bullshit my whole life. You will find the love of your life. You will be understood, loved, cared for my that ONE person you’re entire life. 

Thats a fucked up thing say to show an impressionable kid (impressionable person actually im still gullible as hell). And on top of that we’ve been bombarded by this propaganda our whole life.  Can love truly be portrayed in cinema? In books? In music? Is love the addition of how we all think love should look like? Or is it a personal experience? Can love be portrayed at all? What is love? And why is everybody saying that it’s so hard to define? I mean a basically just answered myself there but wtv. Can a man love me the way I want to be loved? Can a woman love me the way I want to be loved? Can anyone really? Can I love myself the way I want to be loved? Yeah right, that's the better question. 

I keep to myself for the most part. I find it hard to make solid connections with people. I don’t think it was always like this. It’s sort of heart wrenching knowing that 75% of the people you meet won’t amount to anything more than a good acquaintance or someone you’ll meet in passing. I’ve come to believe that I’m supposed to be on my own in this journey, with a handful of people I can trust and truly call my friends. I’ve learned to accept that I can’t be close with the world, and that not everyone is going to like you or even give you the time of day to get to know you. And lastly, learning to cope with the fact that life isn’t fair. Period. But most importantly, being an adult is learning how to accept that fact and make the most out of what you have, even when your chips are down.

  We all have lives, especially in our early 20s. This is the time where, for most of us life is a bit crazy. Our generation is unlike any. We’re the boomerang generation. The “entitled generation.” The, “we’re special generation,” or whatever else the media wants to spin it as. We’re a result of over educated adults living in a time that probably isn’t so much different than generations that have surpassed ours. Let’s look at the facts, we’re living in a world of technological expansion, most of us spend more time communicating online and through text messages than we do in real life. We’re living in a world, that’s about to collapse, due to our government placing monetary value on “things,” rather than our environment. Not to mention the risk of a potential nuclear disaster 4x as bad as Chernobyl, and radiation exposure that could potentially kill us, due to the Fukushima, disaster in Japan. 

  So stop feeling sorry for yourself. Get up, and just keep moving along. Bite the bullet. Don’t have expectations of grandeur ideas of where your future will lead and then be disappointed because at the age of 27 you haven’t accomplished them all yet. Just be in the moment and try to make the best of every day you’re given. Some of us will walk with many by our side, some with few. Some with stacks of bills in the bank, some with little, some with none.

  You can’t compare yourself to other people. Each of us, are living in our own personal dramas and have our own spiritual journey to complete. So every time you feel like giving up and resorting back to doing nothing, remember that it’s all in passing, and you have to make use with the time you have. Things rarely stay the same. Especially things you’re unhappy with, that is unless you decide not to try and change them.

  Be content with yourself. You are your own best friend, your own worst enemy. You are the love of your life. Just like you would have good moments or bad moments with friends or loved ones, you will have those moments with yourself. Don’t let those who take advantage of you ruin your overall faith in the human race. Take each day as a new lesson learned. And remember, it’s always dark before the dawn. Each hard moment can only bring you closer to where you’re supposed to be.