I'm this close to losing it. It's been so fucking long since I'm in this state of mind. This is freaking scarring me badly and scares the shit out of me. No I don't have the ability to fail. I can't afford to. It's just mother fucking painful. My friends are telling me I can do it, they've seen me gone through so much. Sometimes it's because of all the pain I've been through that's why I fear failure. It's where I'm avoiding pain. Today's paper suck & it was my most confident paper. Someone please tell me how am o going to go about w my up coming paper. My next paper it's on Saturday. Technically I only have a day to study. I'm just this close to breaking down. But I can't. I wish I'm still in poly. No poly isn't easy, but it's just where I flaunt & show the world I made it despite my limitations. It's where I regain my hope. But now everything is starting to crash. It's fucking painful & tormenting.
