#yipper

    It was a peaceful day in the great city of Unnamed city. The birds were singing - this included officer Peeps who truly showed that great singing was in fact not a biological thing among all avian - the sun had shown them mercy and decided not to crash into the planet on this day.

The plush bird was patrolling the area on claw-foot, a cup of coffee in his hand-wing and watching all the good citizens and families go about their day. Peeps knew in his fluffy body that today was going to be the perfect day and he was going to savor it to the fullest. This thought came to him as he was passing by a bank and once the thought had finished the short distance across his brain, an alarm rang out. 

The building literally came to life giving small hops in place as an alarm blared within it. Peeps and everyone around the building came to a halt as they stared in surprise. The doors to the bank were flung open and a figure shot out of it, running on all fours with a bag in its mouth. The master burglar Yipper raced past officer Peeps purposefully hitting the bird, causing him to spin and his drink flung into the air.

Yipper raced down the sidewalk, laughing to himself as he made off with his haul. Meanwhile officer Peeps managed to recover from his spinning just in time to have his coffee fall on top of his fluffy head. There was a single moment of silence as the coffee soaked into his uniform and plush body. The officer began to turn red in seething anger, a fire lit up in his eyes and he zeroed in on the retreating form of Yipper. 

The officer jumped yelling in anger, steam coming off of him, evaporating the coffee before he gave chase. A dust cloud formed behind him as the citizens watched him disappear and give chase to the dastardly criminal.

The great chase was on!

Yipper couldn’t help chuckling to himself. He had just pulled off another successful heist, stealing just enough to finish that money sculpture of himself. It was going to be his best work of art yet, something that had even him in awe. On top of all that he had even sent that annoying cop on a spin trip, Yipper would not forget the look on that annoying bird brain’s face. Today was looking perfect for the dastardly burglar. 

Suddenly Yipper’s ears picked up a strange sound. He lifted one of his ears up and tilted his head to hear it better. The sound was getting louder and louder, Yipper swore it sounded like a steam train coming right at him. The alien dog looked behind him in confusion only to be met with a very angry officer Peeps barreling down the road towards him. The officer was bright red and clearly not in a good mood. He was holding a baton in his wing-hand and blowing a whistle that sounded like the whistle of a train, it was even blowing out steam. 

In short the officer looked like he was going to kill Yipper.

The officer caught sight of the dog and Yipper could feel his one eye bulge out of his socket as the officer’s claw-feet turned into train wheels and he began running even faster. Yipper, knowing danger when he saw it, decided to high-tail it. He had seen the cop angry before but he must have really yanked the chain hard this time. 

The officer and burglar barreled down the sidewalk, citizens moving out of their way as the two paid them no mind, focused on getting away or catching the other. One citizen, an elderly cat lady, was having trouble crossing the street. Cars were speeding down the road and the light would change for only a second before the cars would start again. The cat lady looked around in distress, if only there was an upstanding young person who could help her this time. 

It was at that moment that Peeps and Yipper were making their chase down the sidewalk. The cat lady spotted them and oblivious to their situation, cheered up. Ah, there was an upstanding young person, surely they would help her in her blight. The cat lady lifted a hand-paw and began waving to the dangerous duo, running right towards her. Yipper, who was in the lead, raced past the cat lady bumping into her at a speed which caused her to start spinning. Peeps in hot pursuit and completely focused on the burglar, accidentally kicked the lady and flung her into the air. Thankfully a cat always lands on their feet-paws and the cat lady landed right across the street. 

She got up and waved to the oblivious duo, simply happy to have made it across the street. However before she resumed her walk, she noticed that her purse was missing. That was odd, she could have swore she had it before she crossed the street. 

Yipper, now with a small purse around his neck, decided he could try and lose the officer in the park. The park was filled with people on this perfect day who suddenly had to get out of the way as a certain officer and thief made their war path. The burglar spotted a playground and gave a sly smile, the officer could not hope to keep up with him there. The alien dog ran to the playset and up the slide, bumping several children out of the way. Peeps shortly following behind and attempting to run up the slide, only to slip and fall on his face. 

Yipper couldn’t help but to look back and laugh at the dumb officer. This only enraged Peeps further and with his new found anger, he got up and slammed his claw-foot into the slide puncturing it. He proceeded to make his way up the slide at a frankly terrifying pace. Yipper once again felt his eye bulge and decided it was best to resume running. 

Yipper turned and ran, noticing a rope bridge and making his way across it with Peeps following after finally reaching the top of the slide. However when Peeps attempted to run across the rope bridge, the poor frail ropes couldn’t take it anymore and broke under the weight of the fluffy cop. Peeps was sent plunging three whole feet down. Yipper snickered as he slide down another slide, having witnessed the dumb cop take a fall, now he couldn’t catch him. 

That thought abruptly ended when Yipper made it to the end of the slide and was face to face with an angry officer who had simply gotten up and walked around the playset. Yipper gave a short nervous wave to Peeps - who was lightly tapping his baton into his wing-hand - before running back up the slide, he had just gone down. 

This continued on for some time with the two making their way around the playground, climbing on the rock wall, swinging across the monkey bars, playing a rousing game of chess before Peeps flipped the board. Several children watched as the two rushed around the playground in a huge dust cloud before the poor playset couldn’t handle it anymore and collapsed under their weight with a groan. 

As the soul of the poor playground equipment went up to the great park in the sky, Yipper managed to crawl his way out and began running once again. Peeps suddenly sprang from the rubble and the chase resumed, ignoring the crying of several children. 

A skeleton man with a cool pair of shades glanced in the direction of all the noise and swore he heard the sounds of crying and the death of playground equipment. Eh, the skeleton shrugged, nothing he hadn’t heard on a Tuesday before. Bones, who was leaning against a swing set, turned to look at his roommate Johnny and wondered if he should say something. 

He once again gave a shrug, too much work and besides Johnny was busy pushing Pompom on the swings. The little clown kept insisting on going higher and Johnny was trying his best but was also worried about hurting the clown as well. 

It was a peaceful scene and one that would have remained as such if it wasn’t for that loud noise getting suspiciously closer and closer. Bones once again lifted his sunglasses and noticed the tornado that was officer Peeps and Yipper heading right towards them. However before the lazy bones could even think to warn his friend about the incoming storm, it was already on top of them. 

The disaster duo sped right past them, knocking Johnny back and bumping right into the swing that Pompom was on, sending it into a spiral that rocked the entire swing set. The swing went faster and faster until eventually Pompom - who was having a great time by the way - was sent flying into the stratosphere.

The cop and burglar continued on their destructive way, taking no notice of Johnny who was staring at the sky in frozen horror as his clown son was sent into space. Bones casually walked over to Johnny and began to laugh as the humor of the situation set into his bones. Before Johnny could smack the skeleton’s head clean off, the swingset gave one final groan and fell over landing directly on Bones, breaking the skeleton. Johnny could do nothing but sigh and maybe laugh a little at his roommate's karma. 

(Pompom would later return home after an exciting adventure, crashing into a UFO and almost being dissected by aliens who found Pompom much too terrifying to understand. Johnny would breathe a sigh of relief when Pompom was dropped through the roof of their house, landing on his lap by said UFO.  Bones, while happy to see Johnny in better sprites, couldn’t help wishing the aliens had kept Pompom just a day longer.) 

Yipper turned and looked back at the officer still hot on his heels, he really really must have yanked the chain hard if the bird brain was still keeping up with him. The thief turned his head back around just in time to notice the ice cream cart he was about to crash into. Running on an instinct that only a seasoned alien dog burglar could possess, he jumped onto the ice cream cart and used the momentum to ride the cart.

Freezy could only watch as her beloved ice cream cart was hijacked by a weird dog riding on top of it. She had been making a killing on the sales too and still had a line of people in front of her, waiting for ice cream. Peeps soon followed, pausing to shyly tip his hat to Freezy with a blush on his face before he resumed chasing Yipper. 

Freezy just looked at the retreating couple before turning back to the long line of disappointed ice cream fans who could no longer purchase the frozen treat. Freezy wondering if there was anything she could do, notice a single scoop of chocolate ice cream on the ground. She held up her finger in a one second gesture to the crowd before disappearing with the ice cream.

Freezy later returned with a giant ice cream monster, brought to life by the dark arts. She took payments for folks to jump on and devour her monster ice cream to their heart’s content. It was a massive success until everyone began to transform into ice cream zombies but that is a story for another time. 

Yipper was happily licking up ice cream as the cart sped out of the park, he turned to see if he finally lost the cop. Much to his surprise Peeps was actually keeping up, he wasn’t as close as before but it was still annoying to have him on his tail, he needed to get to his hideout after all. That was when the dastardly hound got an idea. 

He threw the ice cream he was holding, hoping to trip the stupid cop up. Instead of slipping up however the officer began using the ice cream as a roller skate to catch up with the speeding thief. Yipper’s one eye bulged out of his socket again and he slapped a hand to his forehead in annoyance, he swore this officer was shortening his already small doggy life span. 

Yipper, now more annoyed than ever, continued to throw ice cream at Peeps. Peeps to his credit, managed to dodge several scoops even managing to get another ice cream roller skate, that still didn’t stop him from taking a few to the face however. While Peeps was either eating the ice cream or having it melt under his angry determination to catch Yipper, the pair passed a particular alleyway. 

Leaving ice cream in their path, the duo failed to notice several cat creatures poking their heads out of trash cans. The cat monsters noticed the delicious ice cream and came out in a hoard to lap it all up. Eventually many of the cats, including a particularly round one, figured out there must be a source for the ice cream. The round cat gave a meow and like a call to action, all the cats in the vicinity banded together to chase down the runaway ice cream cart. Before any of the citizen’s knew it, a storm of monster cats had joined the chase.

The cart was out of control as it sped up and down hills, running over anyone and anything in its way. The thief seemed unaware of this, too focused on trying to slip up a certain officer, he wasn't aware of the cart racing towards a particular restaurant. 

Chef Budge was just putting the finishing touches on his latest masterpiece, a seafood mushroom truffle cake. He made it after weeks of searching and killing for the perfect ingredients, it was gonna be a big hit in his restaurant and he would be damned if anyone ruined this for him. He had been so focused he didn’t notice the screams and citizens running outside the restaurant but he did hear the sudden crashing noise. 

He gave an angry growl and rushed to the front of the restaurant, slamming open the double doors to confront the fool ruining his moment. Suddenly what looked to be an ice cream cart with a dog on top of it, slammed into the poor chef, running him over and entering the kitchen. Before the chef could get up, a cop on ice cream roller skates rolled over him, covering him in a trial of ice cream. 

(Chef recognized the flavor as raspberry tangerine, his least favorite ice cream flavor.)

The two of them rushed around the kitchen, grabbing pans and smacking the other with it, Yipper managed to grab some sausage links and wrapped it around himself wanting to snack on them later. The two rushed around the countertop, the same countertop that had the chef’s truffle cake on it.  Budge quickly got up and ran over in an attempt to save his creation. 

He was able to dodge the pair of idiots, wreaking havoc in his kitchen and was just about to grab the cake when a rogue pan went flying and smacked the back of the chef’s head. He dropped the cake back onto the countertop, miraculously the cake was fine but the same could not be said for the chef’s anger.

Finally unable to take it anymore, he turned to the oblivious idiots and let out a terrifying yell that could be heard from miles around. Yipper and Peeps stopped their chase, both frozen in mid air with Yipper posed to throw more ice cream and Peeps about to whack him with a pan.  The cart itself seemed scared and showing wisdom that neither Peeps or Yipper possessed, gave a squeak before turning around and rolling out of the restaurant as fast as its wheels could manage. 

Before leaving however, Yipper threw the ice cream at Peeps who ducked out of the way. The ice cream found a home right on top of the truffle cake.

Peeps sensing the danger he was in quickly gave a nervous tip of the hat and rushed out to again give chase to the dog burglar. The chef stared at his creation thoughtfully giving it a quick taste test, he found it to be delicious, the ice cream turned out to be exactly what it needed. He smiled and fist bumped the air but his victory was short lived as he felt an odd rumbling. 

It shook the restaurant and before the chef could figure out what it was, hundreds of monster cats suddenly swarmed the restaurant, having followed the ice cream trail. Chef was suddenly covered in a sea of furry monstrosities, licking him and drowning him. The cats eventually continued on their way, taking the poor chef with them as he was swept along. Pixel, also riding the wave, grabbed the cake and held it up in victory as the cats moved out of the restaurant.

Both Peeps and Yipper were bruised, covered in ice cream, and both were tired but they were also too stubborn and in some people’s opinion too stupid to stop now. Yipper still had the bag of money, the purse, and the sausage links from chef Budge’s restaurant. He was not giving up with the haul he had on him even if it would kill him, which was a real possibility with the next obstacle coming up. 

It was gonna be a glorious day, a day that would go down in history as Skidd Mccrash would finally complete the ultimate dare devil challenge. The obstacle course was insane, thought up by a fellow daredevil who was going mad with stunts, it had never been attempted before. It had jumps, loops, rings of fire, spinning blades and chainsaws. as well as a quiz game that tested basic knowledge. It will be the raddest, most hardcore specticle that this city will ever have the fortunate to bear witness to. A crowd had formed waiting to see if this ended in victory or carnage, either way they would get their afternoon’s worth of entertainment. 

Circuit and his two coworkers were already on the scene with Circuit reporting and his blue coworker handling the camera. The red reptile was taking notes and would occasionally get bored and eat the pages of said notebook, apparently each page had its own unique flavor. Circuit had already interviewed Mccrash and now everyone was just waiting for the signal that Mccrash could go as he revved up his motorcycle ready to make history. 

The countdown had just begun with the crowd joining in chanting ten…nine…eight…

Circuit was practically humming with excitement as the countdown continued, nobody seemed to notice a runaway car and officer heading in their direction. Just as the countdown finished and Mccrash was about to hit the gas, an ice cream cart carrying an alien dog burglar sped past him along with an officer.

Yipper had just turned around to see where exactly the cart was going just in time to see a massive and deadly looking obstacle course. This time he swore his eye did leave his socket as it bulged out at the massive structure that he was currently heading towards. Well he thought, now is a good time to get started on that will. He pulled out a piece of paper and pen from the purse and began writing.  

Everyone watched in disbelief and morbid curiosity as what looked to be a weird dog and officer Peeps sped through the obstacle course. They raced around loops, jumped through rings of fire though just barely as Yipper wiped the sweat off his brow only to realize that his ears were on fire. Peeps meanwhile had to put out his hat to mixed success as his wing caught on fire as well. Thankfully the water gun section put out the fire even if they both ended up very wet.

Circuit gestured to keep the cameras rolling as the duo went through the spinning blades and chainsaws. Yipper nearly gets completely shaved and officer Peeps comes out with a spiffy new haircut. They had just reached the end of the quiz game - Peeps getting hung up on the basic math portion and Yipper’s answer to everything was just steal it, the cart passed with flying colors - and were coming up to the final jump. The jump was the biggest one yet and in order to make it, one had to leap over thirty buses all stacked on top of each other. 

(The buses were thinking of unionizing after this stunt was done.)

Everyone watched as Peeps still on ice cream roller skates seemed to get a second wind and was catching up to the cart. Peeps reached his wing-hand out and finally managed to grab the cart. A feat he was very proud of until they were launched into space. 

Both Yipper and Peeps felt weightless as they hung in the air for a concerning amount of time, it wasn’t until a satellite passed them did they think to look down. I think that is the Earth was the thought that crossed both of their tiny minds before they looked back up at each other. Gravity suddenly woke up and remembered what it was supposed to do just in time for Yipper and Peeps to hug each other as they hurtled back down to Earth. 

The crowd and Circuit meanwhile were watching the sky to see if they could catch sight of the duo. Finally someone yelled and pointed at the sky, everyone squinted as they saw a square figure hurtling towards the planet. The ice cream cart from before was coming down at a frankly concerning speed and many wondered if they should start running when they suddenly felt a rumbling. 

Finally tearing their eyes away from the ice cream cart meteorite - a tough feat to be fair - everyone turned to see an absolutely terrifying storm of monster cats heading right for them. Everyone turned to run with the exception of Circuit who could not believe his luck as he got to witness these wonderful creatures all at once.  Both his coworkers tried to get his attention before finally shrugging to each and running for their lives. Circuit would be fine, the guy certainly seemed happy enough.

One of the cats pointed to the sky where their ice cream deity was falling back down to Earth for them. Pixel gave a meow and nodded, the cats knowing what must be done overran the obstacle course, destroying everything in their path as they formed a pillar to reach the cart. Using the course to their advantage they created a huge tower of cats under the cart, it was a beautiful and yet horrifying sight to behold.

The cart landed right on top of the tower, the cats sagged under the weight of the ice cream carrier but the cats were stubborn and soon the cart finally came to a stop.

They let out a triumphant meow as they finally had their prize and the tower slowly came down as the creatures ransacked the cart. Circuit watching in awe, he was in heaven as cats surrounded him, he wished he had more arms so he could pet them all. He eventually spotted his own cat Pixel who was still carrying the truffle cake. Circuit overjoyed extended his arms, picked up his pet and began burying his face in their fur, cake still in their fluffy paws.

Circuit eventually snapped out of his euphoria as he heard a groan at his feet, looking down he saw that it was none other than his boyfriend chef Budge.  Budge did not look like he was having a good time, his clothes were ripped and wet with cat saliva, he had lost his hat and he didn’t have a chance to try out his latest masterpiece.

Circuit looked down at the poor chef, happy to see him but also very concerned. It was then he noticed the cake in Pixel’s paws, he snapped his fingers as he got an idea. Using his mouth, he removed one of his gloves, revealing his sharp robot claws and with a quick precise swipe, Circuit cut the cake. He grabbed one of the pieces and leaned down, setting Pixel on the ground, who proceeded to walk off to share the cake with his fellow cat brethren. 

Circuit helped the chef into a sitting position and handed him the slice of cake, Budge proceeded to eat the slice still in a bit of a daze. He finally snapped out of it and saw the smiling face of his boyfriend who waved at him. Budge looked around, still a bit confused as to why he was in the middle of what looked to be a huge disaster with monster cats all around him. Circuit just patted him on the shoulder and helped him get back on his feet. Budge watched as his cake was being devoured and just sighed.

He had a long day and at least someone was appreciating his masterpiece even if it was a bunch of cats. 

He watched as Circuit was surrounded by a hoard of cats, most of them seemed familiar with the reporter who looked like he was in heaven as they purred and rubbed up against him. He tried his best to cuddle as many as he could and as scary as they looked it was a kinda adorable sight. The chef couldn’t remember the last time he saw his boyfriend this happy. Seeing him overjoyed was a nice consolation prize the chef thought to himself finishing his cake.

Meanwhile the duo that had started this whole mess were currently hurtling back down to Earth. Both of them really didn’t like that this was going to be the way they died but so be it. As they got closer to the planet, they both closed their eyes - one eye in Yipper’s case - and said their final prayers as they both crashed and landed right in the police department. 

Both of them saw stars as they slowly got up from their adventure, Yipper no longer had the bag of money, purse or sausage links.

(All of them had fallen back down to their respective owners, the cat lady got her purse back in time to finish her shopping. The bag of money landed right in the bank owner’s arms as they were talking to the other officers. Budge meanwhile had some sausage links land right on his head as he was watching Circuit. The cats proceeded to swarm him and it took Circuit’s help to get him out with minor scratches.)

Eventually both the thief and officer snapped out of their daze and realized both of them had landed in a jail cell. Peeps gave a triumphant cry and jumped in the air, he had finally caught the burglar after such a long chase. The dog growled, not at all happy to lose his stolen goods and landed in a cell with Peeps of all creatures. 

He jumped on the cop, determined to wipe that smug smile off that bird brain’s face and a scuffle started in the cell. A scuffle that soon came to an end as they both heard a familiar clearing of the throat, both stopped and turned to face the chief of police.

Peeps knocked the alien dog off of him and saluted his boss, all the while giving a cocky smile to Yipper. Now his boss was surely going to release him from this cell and congratulate him on a job well done. Instead the boss just looked at Peeps with a tired, disappointed look on his face, which worried the naive officer.

The chief snapped his fingers and several officers wheeled out a t.v. and set it in front of the cell. The chief turned it on and the news immediately started blaring with a very concerning headline.

“Terror struck Unnamed city today as disaster in the form of two idiots demolished the city. Perfect day ruined.”

It showed a quick picture of Yipper and Peeps before cutting back to Circuit who was the one reporting  the disaster. He wasn't particularly sad especially with a dozen or so cats hanging off of him but it did create a more unnerving sight as the camera panned around to show the destruction of the obstacle course from before. It was on fire and people were running away from the inferno, Budge was seen trying to pull a cat off his face and other cats were using the fire to roast marshmallows.

The camera cut to what looked to be a huge car crash in the downtown area where ice cream littered the streets. Dr. Goop was on the scene attending to several poor victims, the doctor looked both ecstatic to have so many new patients to attend to but also concerned for the damages. Annette could be seen in the background sweeping away the debris, this was just a normal day for her.

The camera cut again to show the park destroyed and children crying, a huge ice cream monster rampaging in the background and Johnny wheelbarrowing his skeleton roommate away. The news showed almost the entire city in some form of distress and Peeps brain working in overdrive put two and two together. He gave a nervous smile to the chief who glared at the pair, his officer in particular.

A day later, Peeps and Yipper could be seen in prison uniforms, helping to clear the damages from their high speed chase. Several officers and Annette were assisting in their community service of beautifying the city and any time the two of them were seen fighting, they were hit over the head with several mallets.