#yesii

Usahay, naay mga higayon nga makapanglandom kos akong kaugalingon, "am I faking or is this genuine? Am I being frfr istg?"

Dili man gud malikayan na akoang makita sa ako buhat ug trato sa isig ka tawo na akong makauban sa pang adlaw-adlaw, na mura'g makaana na lang ta "lahi jud bai."

Sa balay, usahay jolly na labwan pa ang nakainom ug pipila ka energy drinks sa ka bibo. Naa pud usahay, mas bibo pa ang snails sa amo fish tank kesa nako. Makaana ko, "pareha ra mang balay, nganong di nako kaya i-keep ang energy?"

Ug sa among Social Psychology, adto nako nakuha ang validation [VALIDATION?!] na ako gipaabot. Finally, makaana na ko, "ah normal ra diay. I'm not alone." Kay diay, mag depende sa sitwasyon ug sa huwisyo sa indibidwal ang iyahang batasan usahay.

Na dili kay gamug-ot lang siya, bati na dayog batasan. Basin diay they woke up on the wrong side of the bed lang. Na dili kay gamayng-kahit masuko na siya, gamay na siyag pasensya. Basin diay overstimulated na daan tapos nadagdagan lang.

It won't hurt to keep an open mind and an accepting heart. Kindness goes a long way but sometimes understanding and a little patience will also do the trick.

Simon says... stop the irony.

Yikes.

During the presentation, it was what stuck to me the most. Funny how our topic is about conformity and obedience YET even us conform with the rest of the class.

The discussion was filled with lessons and guidance. It made us see what areas we lacked effort on and which part we can improve ourselves. Truly a light and hopeful moment to end whatever that week was.

Simon says... speak your truth— and the truth is to look no further for examples because we are here.

Growing up, I'd say I was always a faux actor in a blinding stage. Someone who felt so out of place but had no choice but to play the part because it was what they want to see from me, and I hate disappointing people.

Nevermind that I hate attention. Nevermind that I hate being watched. Nevermind that I, too, is a human so imperfect I had to pretend I was the opposite.

Growing up, I'd say eyes were on me. From all the praises and achievements I got, I thought it was the only purpose of my life. And so I strived for it.

Nevermind that I was tired. Nevermind that while chasing the glory and praises, I have been slowly burning myself out. Nevermind that I no longer feel their pride no matter how many medals I get.

Social Psychology is not just helping me understand other people. It is also opening "issues" I have with myself that I didn't know were bad. It's like exploring a new map and suddenly triggering a new quest, one that you don't have any choice but to confront right there and then.

As I sat there, shivering from cold, the topic didn't only described how I lived. It also made me realize and grieve for all the years I could have lived myself, but didn't because I was too blinded to be the version of myself others wanted for me.

But I also felt freed, like a child finally guided through life. Now, I'm slowly recovering from the past. Life for me is no longer a blur of survival and show. It had find its warmth through my friends and family. And I can say that life truly is worth living when you are actually alive, and not just surviving.