#xx. thread

   Music was an escape. It was indescribable at times; erotic and blinding at others. Joan oft struggled to balance her “regular life” with this drug. Her guitar felt like more than just a guitar. It was an extension of herself. She poured her soul into the instrument, sacrificing herself to it. Everything she was, everything she felt and loved, was in music. Her pain, her love, her deepest desires all became hits gobbled up by fans. Her world was in music. But with such intense focus, such an addiction of sorts, to her music came a price she didn’t always know she was paying. There were things happening before her very eyes that she did not — no, could not see until the d a m a g e had been done.

   Oh, Alex, sweet Alex, she thought one lonesome night. How long ? Joan felt guilty for not seeing the signs sooner. Maybe, just maybe she could have done something about it if she had seen, something to help the person she called friend. But how could she call their relationship a friendship anymore ? Joan hadn’t been there for her friend; no, she was blinded by her addiction to the fast paced life music brought her, and blinded by the very person responsible for the pain inflicted on dear Alex. How could she apologise for abandoning her friend, leaving her with a monster, ignoring the signs that did little to hide ? But that’s the question, isn’t it ? Could she ever apologise ? Did Joan deserve forgiveness after allowing this horror to continue for so long behind the doors that only needed the smallest push to open ?

  A deep exhale escaped her rosy lips. Joan needed to make things right. ( This can’t continue any longer, no matter the cost ! ) It’s a horrifying situation that she can’t stand to see Alex in. Though she did not know the full extent of Kim’s abuse, she did know action was needed. Could she be her savior ? Did Alex truly need one ?  What if Alex didn’t want her help ? It was a dreadful, painful, thought that slipped in without warning. What if ?— No ! She could not take that as an answer, Goddamn it. She wasn’t there before, but she sure as hell was going to be there for her now. Kim had to suffer for this.  

  One typical day off for the girls, Joan waited for the band to break from practice before pulling their band manager assistant to the side. Joan acted noticeably different than usual, knowing the subject that she was about to bring up.

  “ Alex, ” she started, “ I have to talk to you about something. I know. ” Her voice was serious, but calm. She didn’t want to frighten or anger Alex, as she knew not everyone would take the hand of a friend offering help. “ I want to help. “ Was that too forward? she immediately thought.