#wwymm

But the specimen showed no signs of potato cyst nematodes.

Your sample was clear.

You announce your finding with barely contained excitement to Harry from across the lab.

A laugh leaves you, grin forming as you turned to your colleague, finding your joy mirrored in his eyes, the wrinkles around his eyes creasing behind his goggles the biggest indicator he smiled back.

If this wasn't an error, you might be looking at real steps forward in decontaminating soil, entire fields maybe.

This was a possible game changer.

There was no greater high than this moment.

You were on the mountaintop, overlooking the summit.

Finally.

Aisling shrieks when you tell her the news, apologizing afterwards as she wraps her arms around you, but you know you're still beaming. You haven't been able to stop smiling since you'd confirmed twenty samples showed no signs of infection. Assuming you'd be able to replicate it, and a partner lab. The next steps had you feel like you were electric, warm and blood singing in your veins with each beat of your heart.

You were glad to be able to share this moment with her, after all she'd put up with in your soap opera life.

And it's nice to catch up on her life.

It's not really a surprise when she announces Joe's finally proposed. They'd been together for ages. (And you don't like where your mind goes when you think back, smashing the 'what-if's that come with.) So it only made sense that they'd take that step forward, after they'd learned and grown with each other. That there was likely something to do with her grandmother talking her ear off about 'living in sin' , and your face heated unpleasantly because that had only started since Colin was born.

She's your best friend, has been for years, and you're so happy for her. And there's a part of you that feels terrible for the bitter part of you that wants that, wishes you had it.

You shove that even further down, pitch it from your mind while you clear your throat.

"I'm so happy for you." And it's true. You are ecstatic that she's able to move forward in her life with someone she loves beside her. Suddenly you feel an ache that you didn't shriek in excitement, like you were downplaying this huge news of hers, and-

"Perfect, because I need my maid of honor next to me, and I am even going to pretend I want start a sibling feud." She says it so earnestly, that it takes you a moment laugh.

But her face is still serious, and you feel your mouth go slack.

“Babes,” Aisling's fingers are so light on your arm but you stop, laughter dying. "Please be my maid of honor."

Of course you would. You nod your head frantically as you finally get the words out.

Why did you always forget that Ash was always in your corner and wanted to share her highs with you. Like you'd done with her.

It was really the reminder you needed that there was good in the world.

"And," the way she draws the word out has you blinking back your tears, so you could make out her face. "Colin could be my ring boy?"

Damn her.

There's no way you could deny your son the spot.

And you knew damn well he was going to look amazing in the photos.

Damn.

You end up crying as you hug her.

This was really happening.

It still didn't feel real.

There was a living being on your chest, breathing with you as he seeks the warmth of your flesh. You sought Ash's eyes as you tried to make sense of your situation. To confirm this was reality. That you'd really done it. All the months of feeling absolutely adrift while promising yourself another day, another week, another month and you'd know what you were doing.

And now he was here.

Your doctor is saying something, and you desperately try to pay attention.

And there is a living being in your arms.

This was real.

You'd done it.

You'd accepted a position at a lab that held your interests. You were going to make money doing the thing you wanted to do.

You'd had your baby.

Yours.

You were making your life how you wanted it to be.

Now there was just every day to come.

You could do it.

Before you pick up Colin, you opt to treat yourself to a coffee.

You still feel giddy.

All of this together felt like things were finally looking. All the work you'd put in was paying off. And you wondered if this could all work out, then there were more things to look forward to.

You were curious about the future, which the part of you that did want to be optimistic was relieved by.

Everything was going great.

Which is why you finally felt the courage to pause near him. The most beautiful man you'd ever seen, who'd been frequenting your favorite café this last month. You'd chatted politely while waiting for your orders.

So why not take life by the horns.

Live your life.

Kyle gives you his number, with plans to meet up Tuesday morning for coffee before work.