Day 20 of @missdahlelama's #authorlifemonth photo challenge asks us to reveal our #writingweakness. @gabrielleharbowy would tell you it's my attempts to be too clever with my phrasing. My agent would tell you it's my non-mainstream themes and topic choices. @nightwolf182 would likely tell you I sacrifice plot speed for emotional dumps. Me? I think I work too hard. And it's affecting the quality of what I produce. I am terrified that what momentum and fanbase I've aquired will vanish into the mist if I don't publish-publish-publish. Which is ridiculous, but sort of ingrained in me from both my academic background (publish-or-die mentality), Millennial Burn Out Culture, and my Presbyterian upbringing and family values. I think I also need to hustle so hard to prove to my family that I'm not just "wasting my time on an expensive hobby". Which, you know, no one has actually SAID but I worry they're thinking. Every book I put out is proof that my hard work is valid; and because I don't have the other socially approved Life Milestones to shoe off at family gatherings (dayjob career, spouse, car, house, dog, kid), my books are my only way to proove that I am Doing Worthwhile Things With My Life. Which leads to working All The Time which is Not Healthy. I am determined to work on this mindset this year, and to friggin' RELAX. I do not need to write like I'm running out of time. And I have got this pinned to my desk as a reminder. I just gotta get through these last round of edits of #TheSkylarksSacrifice, and write the first draft of #TheMaddeningScience. Ha ha ha. Totally chill 2019. (2020 will be the Designated Year of Sleep (tm), I swear.) #WritersLife #writerscommunity #writersofinstagram#authorsofinstagram#burnout #burnoutculture https://www.instagram.com/p/BuGvRNPAM6s/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=6srzdbdmeqya
