Thinking of modern!Sevika being the anchor for autistic!you (totally not me cough) after a heavy, draining, social event.
Sevika was driving both of you home after she picked you up from the massive event that the company you work for had organized. However, her gaze drifted from the road to you as soon she caught how silent you had been since you left the event. It wasn't over, and yet, you asked Sevika to come and pick you up since everything was becoming too much for you. The people kept increasing with each passing minute, their voices becoming louder and louder, and the heavy responsibility of keeping your mask up and being as polite and refined as possible. Just the task of pretending to be something else, something you aren't, for more than five hours, was impossibly exhausting. It was all too much – you needed to breathe.
“You are quiet.” Sevika voiced her thoughts as her gaze remained on the road, but then she added. “Quieter than usual.” she looked back at you, her grey eyes trying to decipher what is going through that precious mind of yours.
Instead of answering, you just let out a dismissive “mhm” and kept your arms crossed tight in the passenger seat. That made Sevika arch an eyebrow in both confusion and a creeping hunch that she already knew what was going on. Her gaze softened.
“Hey,” her voice matched the soft look in her eyes. “Relax those pretty arms, okay? I'm not gonna crash.” she said with a hint of a smirk, her humour creeping in to lighten up the mood. And unconsciously, your crossed arms did loosen, even though nothing is going to happen. It was just your body's way of acting after feeling overwhelmed and overstimulated all at once.
“There. Now that's better.” Sevika praised you, the affection and love she felt for you clear beneath the surface of her simple words. One of her hands slid to the edge of your seat, hovering near your leg, a silent warning that she was about to touch you. You caught the movement from the corner of your eye, and only then did she rest her palm on your thigh, squeezing with a steady reassuring pressure. Firm, but safe. Just like her.
Your shoulders relaxed as Sevika's grounding touch seeped into your skin, leaving you more trusting and at ease than ever. She had that power on you, the magical way you could just let go and be vulnerable even if your walls tried so hard to stay up, which didn't last long with Sevika. After the draining day at the event, now you're left with overwhelming emotions that threaten to escape in this very small and private place. Sevika noticed it in the way your head dipped forward, hiding your face. You didn't have to say it, she already knew. You just wanted to be held, to feel her hands not only on your thigh, but wrapped around you completely. To be safe and sound.
The first tear caught her off guard. It's silent, just a drop sliding down your cheek before you can turn your head away. But Sevika's grey eyes miss nothing, not when it comes to you. She didn't immediately fill the space with words, just kept her hand on your thigh, firm and acknowledging your current estate. She gave you a moment to feel, to breathe, to decide if you want to hide or let her in. Then, slowly, she pulled the car over to the side of the road. The engine died softly as she turned to face you fully, her gaze steady and warm.
“Hey” she said, her voice low and rough, stripped of the usual edge to it. “Look at me. You don't have to hide from me. Never.” she reached over, her calloused thumb brushing away a tear from your cheek with a tenderness that seemed almost impossible from hands that have broken bones and held weapons.
“I've got you. You're safe here. Whatever it is, we can sit with it. We don't have to fix it tonight. We don't even have to talk about if you don't want to. But I'm not going anywhere.” she shifted in her seat, opening her arms in a quiet yet knowing invitation. “Come here, princess. Let me hold you for a bit. You've been carrying enough for one day.”
And you didn't need to be told twice, just let yourself be cocooned in Sevika's embrace, letting go of everything that had troubled your sensitive mind and body. She reminded you that there was nothing wrong with you, with how you dealt with everyday's situations. That you were no weird or a crybaby if you felt the need to be reassured or held, like in this moment, after a tiring day of wearing a mask that was as heavy as your condition in a world that wasn't made for you. No. She made you feel seen, loved, and understood.
And that was enough, more than enough, because you knew since then, that you had found real love.
