I’m assuming you’re referring more to this post than much else I’veposted about. I’ve lamented a lot of things and then deleted those posts later –mostly popularity imbalances and frustrations with promoting my own fic. They were written out of anger and i didn’t really feel like tumblr needed my own negativity added to the general overabundance displayed.

Whatever you want to write is definitely worth writing.Someone will want to read it. (send me an anon if you post it somewhere, i’ll read it…and promote it but i’ve got a very small follower count so that might not help much) That being said…posting something, no matter how good, probably won’t be popular initiallyfor the reasons I mentioned in the above linked post. And getting an tractionin probably any fandom is next toimpossible unless you have a very popular fandom friend. 

Its so easy to say “write for you, not for fans” when you have fans. The people that have liked my fic are the only reason i haven’t drop-kicked my blog and story off the internet. I got lucky and i got loud, and that seems to have gotten me most of my attention. That being said, getting angry about the lack of traction your work receives is an acceptable and understandable reaction - attacking or harassing someone more popular than you because they are more popular than you is not. 

But it’s very, very hard to want to write something, and then want people to read it and like it when you haven’t gotten any real idea about how other people feel about your writing. You’ll never see your own stuff without bias. Whether you like it or hate it you will have an opinion on it that has little to with the the quality of it. But, sometimes, you have to just say fuck it and get as obnoxiously loud about your shit as you can and demand attention. 

I’ve had a lot offeels during my writing/posting process that I’ve never seen someone else evenmention and I’ve been told things like ‘don’t be so emotionally attached to yourfic’ and ‘don’t put so much importance on other people’s opinions.’  Which are both ridiculous statements thatmade me feel like i was an idiot that didn’t know how to feel about my own creation when I heard them. If you are writing a story ormaking an art and you are emotionally attached to it then that is yourgoddamned right as an artist who has spent 8+ hrs writing or drawing somethingthat will only take 30 minutes (or seconds) for someone to appreciate. 

You arecreating something and presenting it to the world and you should notfeel ashamed for wanting validation, and you should not be told you are beingfoolish or narcissistic for wanting people to not just like it, but share it.  

…i meant to keep this short. I meant to do a lot of things. chriiiist. I’m happy that you are going to write again. If you wish to hear me lament more about my writing/posting woes send me another anon, or if you are having your own send me one. Really i’ve got like…a lot of just things i’ve had to do to keep writing my damned story because i like it and other people like it. I don’t read other fanfics in the kylux fandom(although i have a folder dedicated to people that have kudos’d my fic and write in fandoms i’m interested in - i read those although i avoid kylux ones for now), i don’t follow any star wars blogs anymore.