So, I only recently discovered that you can use Microsoft Word online, and Iām still getting the hang of all the features. Today I discovered that spellcheck has been expanded into an editor feature which considers multiple factors and gives your writing a score. Yāall can probably guess what happened nextā¦.
In rough order of compositionā¦my fics, as graded by Microsoft Word Editor.
1. āBe All Our Sins Rememberedā: overall score of 86%, a respectable B+. 8 spelling issues (these were down to the words āgrunkleā and āgonnaā) and sixteen questionable points of grammar (dialogue). 10 issues with conciseness, 35 with formality, and 2 with punctuation conventions. Since Iām refusing to pay for this service, I canāt set the formality level, so itās not surprising that a word processor would get confused on that point; it also wonāt show me what the ten conciseness problems and 2 punctuation conventions are.
2. āThe Long Lieā: Ouch, overall score of 74%. If I was in class and Microsoft Word Editor was my teacher, I would definitely cry, but happily, Iām not. 42 spelling issues (the name āShermieā wrecked me here), 37 grammar points, 1 issue with clarity, 25 problems with conciseness, 96 issues with formality, 1 issue with inclusiveness, and 5 issues with vocabulary. If you take out the 96 formality points the computer isnāt set up to assess properly, though, I suspect the overall score would look rather better.
3. āEverythingās Fine - Pass That Wine?ā: 80% overall score. 21 spelling, 24 grammar, 2 clarity, 32 conciseness, 51 formality, 3 vocabulary. Not bad, especially since adding a lot of GF-specific words to its dictionary would pretty much erase the spelling issues.
4. Infinitesimal Variations: because yes, I copy-pasted the whole thing into a document to see what I ended up with. Overall score: 75%. 99+ issues with both grammar and spelling for the previously mentioned reasons. 3 issues with clarity, 99+ issues with formality and conciseness, 3 issues with inclusiveness, 10 issues with punctuation conventions, and 37 issues with vocabulary. Despite Powers mentioning the Patriot Act at least twice, it still had zero issues with āPerspectivesā (though Iām only about half-sure what that means) and āSensitive Geopolitical References.ā My guess on the SGRs is that the robot is not very smart and therefore would have needed me to name-check and exactly quote stuff to register on its radar. 177 pages in Word and therefore, I assume, in letter-sized pages.
5. Isoseismal Emanations: overall score, 72%. 99+ spelling, grammar, conciseness, and formality, etc etc. 1 issue with clarity, 5 issues with inclusiveness, 19 issues with punctuation conventions, and 35 objections to my vocabulary. Guess the Cold War was too far back to register as a Sensitive Geopolitical Reference, since I remain faultless in that category and in the category of Perspectives. 275 pages.
6. Interproximal Gradations: Overall score, 73%. 99+ issues in spelling, grammar, conciseness, and formality, of course. 3 issues with clarity, 6 issues with inclusiveness, 23 issues with punctuation conventions, and 52 issues with vocabulary. 362 pages.
7. āThe Earth Never Tiresā: overall score 79%. 39 gripes each with spelling and grammar, 2 with clarity, 51 with conciseness, 99+ with formality, 1 with inclusiveness, 1 with punctuation conventions, and 21 with vocabulary. 24 pages.
8. āThe Player of Gamesā: whoo-hoo, we have an A! Overall score 96%. 5 spelling gripes, 25 grammar gripes, 2 clarity gripes, 50 formality gripes, 1 problem somewhere with punctuation conventions, and three gripes with vocabulary in 52 pages. Really starting to wish I knew what things it considers vocabulary gripes, though.
9. āOur Beginnings Never Know Our Endsā: overall score 79%. 39 issues spelling, 32 grammar, 1 clarity, 23 conciseness, 70 formality, 1 inclusiveness, 1 punctuation conventions, and 6 vocabulary.
And then, just for fun, I threw the latest edit of The Ford Essay in there, too. It got an overall score of 83%, with only two grammar issues, two vocabulary issues, only ten conciseness issues, and zero clarity issues! Heck, it only registered 8 formality issues, even! 16 pages.
Is any of this data useful or reliable or meaningful in any way? I doubt it (even though, curiously, it basically agrees with my assessments of what the best and worst pieces were), but it was a fun exercise, though I really wish I understood what some of its criteria for different categories were. I would also like very much to see what it would spit out if I could adjust the formality setting and add a bunch of GF words to the dictionary - my guess is that I might escape having Word Editor think of me as a C+/B- kind of writer, and might have a shot at joining the B+ writer club - but alas, still not quite curious enough to pay for it.
