#wolfbunny

James: (approaches her) Hey, what's the matter? Oleander's not pissing you off again, are they?

Doom: (scoffs) No, I'm looking at one of my ex's blogs.

James: Ah. Yeah. That'll do it. You know they say never to text your ex... or look in on them. (leans against the back of her chair)

Doom: (rolls her eyes at him) That's not it. He died-

James: Oh-

Doom: -and I didn't get kill him first.

James: ...... (flushes, he thinks that's hot) Oh. Well. You know, we can't win them all.

Doom: ... (frowns, can practically feel the heat radiating off him) Get away from me.

James: Aw, but why? I was hoping you'd kill me next.

Doom: ...Sure. (stabs him with a fork and slices him up with a knife, sticks him on a plate, and throws him out the window)

Doom: I wouldn't even hang you on my wall for decoration, you creep-ass piece of shit. I wouldn't even chop you up and turn you into mulch for flowers. I wouldn't even grow mushrooms on you. I wouldn't even tie chains around your ankles and toss you into the ocean for fish to feed on. I wouldn't even toss you into space for fear some poor alien might happen upon you one day. I'd rather travel back in time and stop you from even being born. I'd rather cut off your father's balls. I'd rather stop your father from being born. I'd rather cut off your entire family tree to prevent you from even one day having skin to begin with.

James: .................You really think about me that much? Oh my god, you're obsessed with me. I love you so much. 😍

Doom: