#witchoil

No it’s good!! But i’d say it’s like knob creek tier good it’s $45 tier good despite being like $100 or whatever for a bottle but it ain’t evan Williams like it’s undeniably better than that

Sam couldn’t help but think about all the times he’d asked, begged, even, for a dog as a kid. Yeah, okay, weird that it was Dean, but still, there was a certain comfort in petting a dog, in feeling him put his whole weight against you and let out that deep-chested contented sigh. His attention slid back to the laptop, the screen filled with a police report and some CCTV footage Dean had snagged by convincing the girl at the gas station that he was with Animal Control. There had been a dog at the scene, it was close enough for a nineteen year old who had looked at his older brother with uncontained lust. According to the police report, the guy had been found dead, near drained of blood, with his tongue ripped out.

oh man......this is immediately cooking some ideas of aragorn/haldir in my mind, either their re-meeting in lothlorien and makeup sex OR if i wanted to put people in hell, title the aragorn drunkenly nonconning legolas out of grief because "from behind you look just like him"

Pyrrha twirled her fingers through a lock of the body's hair. Red, the same shade as her mothers. God, how Wake would sneer at being called a mother, at this girl with her face, her hair. Not her eyes, the body had gotten those from her father. The body, she couldn't bring herself to call it Gideon, not yet, turned toward her touch slightly, grazing her cheekbone against Pyrrha's hand, seeking touch.

tell me what i'm the patron saint of in my ask

THIS is the wincest road head fic, of course; thinking season 3 where dean is in his "we have to do this because i am going to die in (x) months" era and sam is still enough of a dork to say "ummm dean (x) amount of car accident deaths result from road head" and dean says i've died before sammy and i'll die again, and sam is all weird and emo about it and so is dean but of course neither of them will SAY this, so sam says fine, but i'm driving and dean says that's great, you know i love your dick, and he does go down on sam and they don't die but they DO get into a fender bender and dean freaks out because that's baby, and so he has to get all sexy mechanic mode and fix her, and sam comes and fucks sam over the hood of the car while they're in the middle of bobby's salvage yard. send tweet

this would be a kakasaku fake dating espionage and humor fic where they have to travel to some other ninja country and pretend to be a civilian couple to infiltrate the special forces of whatever country. at some point somebody suspects them, and in order to prove themselves, they have to publicly get handsy in a bar. this ends with them going upstairs to fuck, and ultimately kakashi creampies in her while somebody gets assassinated downstairs; they miss the whole thing bc they're boning.