#willorange

“It’s more complicated than that, Rob.”

Robbie glowers, arms folded over himself defensively. Jason always tells him something like that - that there are good reasons their relationship can only ever be purely physical, even in secret. He never actually explains those reasons. Why would he? He’s made it clear that Rob is much too stupid to understand them anyway - he can be fucked and thrown aside easily, but in a thoughtful way, a sensitive way, a way that doesn’t make Jay reconsider his self-image at all.

“So you say, Jay,” he growls, just about starting to lose patience with him. “I think you’re a coward. You don’t want to admit you have feelings for me because that would give you obligations, that you know you can’t fucking meet.”

And Jason just blinks at him, calm and resolute and insufferable as always. “Does that make me unusual?”

Jason wakes to the tinny sound of a YouTube video playing from a phone. It’s not something he’s familiar with. “What are you watching?”

Rob jumps a bit to realise he’s awake, but answers without hesitation. “The others. They’ve just started their tour. Gaz sent me the video.”

Jason wriggles up the bed, leaning on Rob’s shoulder, taking a curious peek. The clip was shot by someone in the audience, the focus isn’t great, but still, Jason notes how good his bandmates - his former bandmates - look on stage together. It looks… neat.

Robbie plays with his hair absent-mindedly. “Do you ever miss it?”

Jason flinches. “No.” He never liked being public property, having everyone know everything about him - Robbie Williams, the superstar, bonded with him over that more than once.

And yet…

He looks at the video again, and sighs. “I do miss them, though.”

“Jason knows Robbie needs to get out before he hurts himself more than he already has.”