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@willdudedoo . . . Because this beautiful soul was one of the first people to read my fic and left me the most heart felt messages and response I have ever gotten over something I've created! I love discussing faiths and culteral applications on religion as well, and she felt comfortable doing both with me and I so appreciate her insights!! She is a total sweetheart, encouraging and deserves all the things ❤🙌🏻
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(1)i desperately need someone to talk to. i finally told my mother that i have endogenous depression (i didnt tell her i have schizophrenia, i was too scared) on skype. the only reaction was - are you kidding me, you dont have depression. dont go to your doctor, it’s fake and you are normal. (i was so scared that i was like ’ok you are maybe right’). i told her then - well i guess if i have suicidal thoughts than i have to do smth with it?and my doctor prescribed me meds and he’s consulting me?
Hey there,
I didn’t get part 2 if there was one, so I’m not sure that I’m getting the whole picture. But I’m so sorry your mom reacted that way, you deserve to be listened to.
If I understand you correctly, you’ve consulted a doctor for your suicidal thoughts and he’s prescribed you some meds and is consulting you - and you tried to tell your mother this. First off, I’m glad your doctor is at least being supportive. Have you talked to him about your psychotic experiences too? I hope you’re able to access the help you need through that channel. You definitely shouldn’t take your mother’s cue and stay away from the doctor.
About your mother: I don’t know your relationship, but what she’s doing by invalidating you when you’re trying to be honest isn’t healthy for you at all. it might come from a place of love “nothing can be wrong with my child, they’re fine bc I want them to be fine”, but that doesn’t make it less hurtful. Consider what you have to gain from her understanding, and if that is considerable, then I would start to educate her.
The best way might be to bring her to a doctor’s appointment, and have your doctor describe the situation to her, but I don’t know if that’s feasible since you may be living far apart, considering you told her this through skype.
Otherwise I would give her a little time, but I wouldn’t let it rest. If you need her to understand, then you will have to be stubborn. Talk to her about your symptoms, and how they are helped by treatment (if they are helped).
Alternatively.... If it’s less important.. Let it go. I’ve never told my father about any of my diagnoses.. I simply know that he would never understand and nothing good could come of it, so I lie through my teeth.
I hope you have other people around you who do recognize your struggle - good luck!
-mod Kit
