Getting up every day, meditating, taking care of my youngest, looking for a job, looking for opportunities, creating, healing...and still overwhelmed. The news, my personal economy, the dangerous political landscape of being a black female immigrant in America...trying to be of service and constantly battling the feeling of being so fucking pointless: it’s a lot. No wonder I get choked so easily of late. I am stretched thin and I am human. I was raised in the midst of personal tyranny. I persist because it’s what I do. The how feels pervasive sometimes. The purpose of having skills and passion and drive if only to be met with brick walls (sometimes of our own making) can be a slow gutting. But my why... my why has stayed consistent, my children. Lately I have come to consciously include my inner child...me...in the concept of ‘my’ children. They aren’t mine. They came through me but they don’t belong to me. Not even I belong to me. It is all the domain of the universe and as such we are all free agents, tools, playthings of the Divine. This I know. This my ego struggles with because that’s what egos do. #whyirise #selfloveguru #ineedajob #desperatetimes #plaything #purpose #immigrant #bw #persistence #mywhy #motivation #motherhood #survival https://www.instagram.com/p/B3opNlQhMe3/?igshid=ncdlq98taexl
