#whoho

When Dean left her, she didn’t try and stop him. One morning he had told her he’d gotten an apartment and he would be moving out by the end of the week.

Should she tell him? Would he care? He never asks about her marriage, never asks to see her outside of Fridays.

Beth’s having a ‘special day’ with just her girls, Emma and Jane. Rio hadn’t shown up the night before, no text, no nothing. She’s just making a quick stop in a corner shop on the other side of town when she sees him, with that girl. The girl with the hair. Pill- Beth.

They’re just talking, for all she knows they could’ve just run into each other, or she could’ve stayed the night at his apartment (the one Beth hasn’t seen). She doesn’t know how to react, or feel.

He doesn’t see her until they’re at the check- out, Jane’s wailing, “Maaamaa, we’re going to be late” when Beth catches his eye. He’s surprised to see her, and she gives him a small nod before she tears her eyes away from the small hand wrapped around his forearm, turning around to catch up to Jane.

Maybe that’s why when Ruby pushes her to at least have coffee with a guy Beth had spoken briefly to at a soccer match, she agrees. They have a coffee on a lunch break and it’s enough to get past Beth’s initial nervousness.

David’s a garden engineer, Beth loves to garden so they find they have plenty to talk to, it’s just that, when David talks about how much a garden tells you about a person. If it’s overgrown and you have to fight your way through, or if it’s well kept with small patches, leaving a teasing trail to its core. Beth blushes, and she knows how she looks, how it makes her chest even more prominent. Then David, following its way down, before he seems to catch up to why she’s blushing, throws his head back and guffaws. The conversation flows even more freely after that. He asks her out the next Friday and she can’t find a good enough reason to say no.

(She secretly wonders if he’ll notice, if he’ll show up and wonder where she’s at.)

David lets Beth pick the restaurant, it’s classy yet cozy, it’s gotten glowing reviews and she’s wearing a red dress she’s only worn once before. It’s in a part of town she’s rarely at, David had offered to pick her up but no, she wanted the independence to meet up at the restaurant and getting back home herself. This isn’t going further then a dinner tonight, she doesn’t feel ready, and what is she supposed to do, invite him for a romp on a blow- up mattress?

Following the waitress through the fully seated restaurant she’s sees two of Rio’s boys, Mr. Cisco and Bullet…? Her first instinct is to think, shit, her second one is, she hopes they tell him. She met her husband at fourteen, the way she craves his reaction is new to her. She gives them a small nod as she passes them.

After dinner David had walked her to a cab, promising he’ll call her later in the week to set up another date, opening the door for her as she slides in.

She’s still in a good mood as she pays the driver, walks up to her front door with a little more sway in her hips than she’s had in a long time. Locking her door after her, she steps out of her shoes, intent on putting them back in her closet straight away, having them dangle on her fingers as she pads barefoot towards the kitchen.

Seeing Mick leaning against her kitchen island surprises her enough to let out a scream and she drops her shoes, flailing with her arms a little. She scowls at him as she picks the shoes up, “what are you doing here?”

He nods to his side, and of course Rio’s there, ignoring what’s unfolding in front of him, tapping away on his phone.

Rio looks up, takes her in, looks away before he locks eyes with her, “we’ve got a meeting with a distributor.”

“Tonight?”

“Now.”

“Okay,” she tries to rearrange her plans for the evening in her head (have a hot bath, a glass of bourbon, calling Ruby and Annie to update them of her date), “I need to change.”

“You’ve got five.”

Pulling on a pair of washed- out mom jeans, a deep v necked tee, a knitted mustard colored sweater, Rio grunts unimpressed when she resurfaces.  

The distributor has been trying his hand on making money on his own, intending to wash it with the batch from Beth, blaming the poor quality on her doing. She’s almost in a shouting match with him, when Rio pulls his gun and for a second, she thinks it’s pointed at her. That he believes this nobody, before the bullet hits the guy’s head and blood splatters on her like rain drizzling from the sky.

 Mick takes her gently by the elbow and leads her out to the car. Sometime later (she’s lost all perception on time) Rio climbs in the driver seats, “Mick’ll stay for the cleanup crew.”

They sit in silence until he decides to break it, “where’s your husband, El?”

“Why would you ask this now?” Exhaustion in her voice.

“I’m asking ‘cause I want to know.”                                                                                    

“He moved out sometime ago.” She just wants to go. To go home. Go to bed.

“And you didn’t think to tell me.”

“Didn’t know it would matter.”

He lets out a chortle, twists his tongue, “didn’t know it would matter.”

“No.”

“Fuck, El. That’s why you’re on a date tonight?”

“Why didn’t you show last week,” she counters, when he doesn’t answer her, she continues, “yeah, that’s what I thought.”

 He doesn’t take her home, instead he takes her to an impressive building, even from the outside Beth can tell it’ll be spacious with an impressive height to the ceilings. Is this…?

Stepping inside his apartment it holds some resemblance to his old one, a generous open space, she can see both the kitchen a living room, a narrow hallway which she assumes leads her to his and Marcus bedrooms.

“Come on.” He leads her to his master bathroom, wipes her face clean of speckles of blood. “We need to get you into some new clothes.” Searching his commode for a spare toothbrush, they stand side by side, brushing their teeth, it’s the first time they do something so domestic. It feels lived in, like she’s a part of his life she isn’t.

He leaves her to undress down to her underwear, they should get rid of her clothes. Rummaging through his closet, when he comes back, she’s sitting on his bed. Her arms shyly in front of her, shielding her body, despite that he has seen and tasted every bit of her.

Handing her clothes to put on, he tries to explain, “he was reaching for his gun. I wouldn’t have shot him otherwise. With you so close to him.”

He almost misses the way she wipes a tear of her cheek, then she drops the clothes and hides her face in her hands, lays back down and tries to suppress her cries.

“Hey, hey, come ‘ere.” Laying down on the bed, he pulls her up until she’s beside him. Lets her cry into his chest as he tells her, “it’s okay, it’ll be alright.” Strokes her hair and tries to soothe her.

Between gulps of air, forcing herself to take calm down, “I thought-“ she stutters and tries again, “I thought you were aiming for me.”

“Why would you ever think that?”

“You have every reason to.”

“If I thought I could shoot you, I would’ve done that a long time ago.”

“That’s not very reassuring.”

He strokes her hair as she stays buried in his arms, “I’m not seeing anyone else. I haven’t for some time.” Untangling himself from her a little, he scooches down the bed until he’s eye to eye to her. Kisses her softly on the lips. “Do you want to see other people?”

“No.”

“Then why did you go on a date tonight.”

“You didn’t show up and then I saw you with her.”

“Instead of asking me, you went on a date.”

“We don’t really talk.”

He reaches forward to kiss her again, frowning when she moves her face away.

“I’m snotty.”

He pulls her t shirt towards her, with a hand on his chest she stops him, “I’m not going to wipe myself on your clothes.”

Leaving his embrace to collect herself in his bathroom, she blows her nose a few times. Padding her eyes with cold water on her fingertips, when she enters his bedroom the light is dimmed low and he’s down to his boxers, pulling the duvets aside and gets in, holding it up for her to join him.

He pulls her close to him, makes her rest his head on his chest and she traces invisible patterns on his chest.

“I had a late meeting, I didn’t know if I should call you to tell you I was running late. By the time I was at your office you’d already gone home.” He shrugs a little, “Talina is just a friend, she was my sister’s girlfriend for ten years and she likes to flirt, but there’s nothing to it. There’s only you.”

“Yeah?”