#whiteoleanderrr

Slowly remembering why I shut off my Facebook and started avoiding social media. It’s just a constant reminder of that nagging feeling of being alone. I’ve always been a drifter and a bit of a loner, constantly fighting the feeling of being an outsider looking in. But since I started getting clean, I’ve become more and more isolated over the years. To the point where now I’m just a lone wolf, for lack of a better word. And most days that’s okay, I’ve come to terms with it. But other days it hurts. Very few people have ever been able to get close enough to me to truly feel at home with. To feel like I don’t have to wear as many masks with in order to belong. And now most of them are gone or left, and I’ve never quite figured out how to form bonds like that again. Or to find others to fill that void.