#westrin

I was in my freshman year and still did not know my way around. Hell, I am now in my tenth year here and I still get lost. I decided that I was going to miss it or get crowded out so I continued on to my class. I was nearly there when someone bumped into me from behind and handed me a hat. “Guard this with your life” they whispered, then vanished before I could even get a good look at their face.

I had just turned around and was on my way to my class, when a man, fairly tall and angular appeared next to me. He put his hand on my shoulder, stopping me in the hallway, and proceeded to get down on his knees. “Please, I’m begging you, give me my hat.” the man implored, looking at me with a face that can only be described as pained. "I’ll give you a godly favor or something I’ll come like visit you or whatever I just want my hat back"

I looked this strange stringy man up and down before asking “Who are you?”

"Literally a deity can I have my hat back"

I studied him for a moment, then came to a sudden revelation. “You’re a senior, aren’t you. This is senior prank and I’m going to end up on the outside of the building hanging by a limb I should not have and have no control over. No thank you.”

I started walking again, when the man stopped me. “I am a deity. I’ll teleport you to your classroom if you just give me my hat.”

I continued walking, and the man followed along with me, repeatedly pleading and promising. Suddenly the figure that gave me the hat in the first place reappeared and the two of the began to insult each other in a variety of languages and with increasingly creative terms.

They both followed me for the rest of the day. No one else seemed to see or hear them, but it was very hard for me to concentrate on classes when people were calling each other “noodle arms” and “soggy bread heel” in loud voices right next to me. At the end of the day, the first one seemed to get bored and left but the skinny guy stayed, and resumed asking for the hat. I eventually agreed to give it to him in exchange for some kind of divine power. He agreed and to this day I am never late, thanks to the power of at-will teleportation. One problem, it is not always that accurate. Now, can you please get me down? I am a little stuck here.