#we're all loved

Hi! I'm Spacey, I'm a furry, and I'm not perfect!

I think that's the hardest thing I've needed to understand ever since beginning this wonderful thing called a relationship that I genuinely feel confident in lasting for a very, very long time. I'm sure a lot of us would like to present ourselves as neatly as possible, coming off as kind or fun to be around, when in reality, we might find it hard to actually be around others. For me, I like to present myself as a gentle and loving person who can adapt to nearly any situation and get along with anyone. This is not true. I'm actually very nervous around new people, whether online or physically, but with time (time that I can only hope the other person is willing to give me), it gets easier. I can be easily frustrated by a number of things, and while I'd like to be more gentle, things can still get on my nerves. But someone taught me that, no matter how frustrated I may get, I'm still me. And they love me as I am. They tell me this time after time after time whenever I feel mad, and their support means the entire universe to me. I'll say I'm ready for something, when I'm still feeling doubtful, and they'll remain patient until I'm truly feeling ready.

I'm someone who can be very chatty when it comes to love, and I'm more than happy to write up a 5-paragraph sonnet about how much I appreciate those closest to me. But while those feelings I express are very true, it does come from a place of me wanting to be that perfect version of myself. The fonks. A fonks who takes care of his loved ones and appreciates everything around them, most especially of all the ones who travel the cosmos alongside them.

I try to prove how much I love, even if that love is genuine, I feel this innate urge to prove that it's real, when in reality, it's better to have faith in others to believe that that love is real, whether you can express it as verbose as you'd wish to or not. I believe that my partners' love is real, regardless of how they express it, and I appreciate everything they do. Yet I'd find it hard to believe that what I'm reciprocating is enough. And I imagine a number of people have felt this way, especially in online relationships.

So I want to tell you that it will be okay. It can be hard to gleam the proper meaning or feeling from what's written in text, it's why we use emoticons and punctuation! (⁠ ⁠╹⁠▽⁠╹⁠ ⁠)

And more often than not, while it may feel like your significant other or friend just isn't very attentive, it almost never is the case. And if you feel this way, I ask you to think about it from their perspective. Do they have a lot of friends online? Are they generally busy? What are their timezones? I can promise you that it more than likely isn't their intention to come off as dismissive or uninterested. We're all trying our best in our own relationships, and sometimes the best thing we can do is just remind each other that we'll do our best to be there for them, and trust that they'll be there for us. At the end of the day, we can't always hold up those standards we impose on ourselves, and relationships are never about being the absolute best or being perfect for your partner(s,) it's about being who we are together, mutually respecting and loving, regardless of those flaws and shortcomings we want to get rid of.

I know you love them. And I love who I have. And I'm almost certain that they know it to. No..