#waraningyo

he can imagine a world where kugisaki approaches him with something bright and absurdly unlike him; sunshine yellows or neon pinks. it's only because he imagines that the stoic and irritable fushiguro's own embarrassment is likely funny to the others. certainly to satoru, he thinks, and kugisaki and itadori are two peas to the pod satoru already inhabits.

and, yet, he indulges her, because deep down he also trusts her eye for aesthetics, even those that are not her own; and, more importantly, even if he didn't, he wouldn't trade quality time with either one of his best friends for anything. if megumi has learned anything, it's that time is fleeting; one day, he might not have such an opportunity to enjoy even the most mundane moments.

megumi knows that kugisaki of anyone understands. they both lived it.

he approaches now, appraises kugisaki's choice in polish with a seemingly equally critical eye; then, nods assent, and sits across from her.

"it's not bad," he says, which is fushiguro-speak for i like it. then, because he's trying to be better about conversation, adds (as a question, though it sounds more like a matter-of-fact statement): "you picked it for my eyes."

@waraningyo + meta questions , always accepting.

there’s a warm-and-cold complexity to yujibara’s spiritual-psychological relationship. there’s more colors to their dynamic than a basquiat painting.

yes, they became fast friends. but not in a shallow or typical sense.

( what they developed is a rare find in this world and theirs. )

yuji’s undeniably sociable and approachable, and yet, not many people can actually tolerate him long-term, nor can many connect with him in ways that matter.

nobara is the exception.

while yuji is vocal, expressive, and filled with idiosyncratic quirks, there are areas of emotional communication he simply collapses in, especially when the topic is guilt, grief, or existential stakes. he retracts. he deflects. he goes quiet and keeps it pushing.

nobara, however, is someone who can operate with him on an unspoken, intuitive “if you know, you know” wavelength and you can tell the love is there, without them even having to say it.

her presence doesn’t pressure him in any way. her personality doesn’t turn him off. her conviction doesn’t suffocate him.

nobara simply gets him.

despite all the trials they endured as teenagers — curses, death, trauma, near-annihilation — nobara helps yuji take care of his inner child in a way no one else can.

the teasing, the banter, her irreverent humor, the way she can pull laughter out of him without trying — she reconnects him to the parts of himself untouched by the ultraviolence and tragedy.

she keeps him boyish. she keeps him tethered to his humanity. she keeps him alive.

yuji unquestionably loves her in a way that’s not infatuation — but unconditional. she’s one of the only people who can touch the innocence he keeps buried under survivor’s guilt and burden. his nihilistic martyrdom — that infamous self-destructive ideology — is a difficult perspective to crack.

nobara’s personal attitude toward existence, her sharp philosophy on living life on her own terms, is the one force strong enough to challenge his fatalism.

her honesty gives his hard-headedness something to soften against, creating room for thought — room for change.

yuji respects her worldview: her refusal to be pitied, her insistence on dignity, and her unwillingness to compromise her agency. their convictions about life — about meaning, death, autonomy, and human dignity — converge more often than they diverge. this mutual alignment makes empathy between them effortless.

and because nobara refuses to indulge self-pity or self-annihilation, she is the balancing force yuji desperately needs.

if he punishes himself, she pulls him back. if he leans toward self-erasure disguised as atonement, she cuts through the delusion. if he spirals, she grounds him.

she is the constant in his life who refuses to let him disappear into guilt.

but the tragedy begins after the battles end.

once yuji’s biology is transmuted — no longer human-clocked, no longer aging, no longer killable by conventional means — everything changes. joy? connection? vulnerability? these are human baggages yuji can no longer afford.

because everyone he loves will die, while he remains. and the thought of seeing nobara or megumi or anyone he cherishes disappear — violently or naturally — is unbearable. immortality sets off a powder keg inside him.

it detonates every human instinct for intimacy. and that explosion makes him pull away from the people he loves the most. not out of apathy. but out of uncontrollable fear.

when he was sukuna’s vessel, yuji was in his vajrapāṇi phase — the wrathful protector, the thunderbolt-bearing guardian who destroys evil with righteous fury.

but after sukuna is gone — after the curse of immortality settles into his being — after he realizes he cannot die — yuji enters his kṣitigarbha phase (im gonna touch on this on later portrayal notes). he becomes the eternal bodhisattva sworn to purifying all the hells until his work is done.

yuji transcended into being the one who refuses to abandon the world no matter how painful it becomes. the one who shoulders suffering without end, because he believes it’s the only thing he’s good for. he fells curses until none are left — or until nothing is left of him.

(if such a fate were even possible anymore).

nobara has what yuji can never have again: death. she can live a full life, surrounded by loved ones, and be mourned when her time comes.

yuji cannot. he no longer has the luxury of looking forward to growing old with those dearest to his heart.

so he steps away from her. because the idea of watching her die would break something inside him he cannot afford to lose. that happened already when mahito presumably killed her. he leaves because he loves her too much to stay. he’s done with funerals.

the small café akari agreed to meet kugisaki at reminds her of the one she used to hide away back in the days her family resided in ōyamazaki; a basically vane attempt at modernization, it's something about the relatively small town feeling of it all and how people differ from tōkyō - a different vibe, and sure it's charming for a while ... but for girls like her? like @waraningyo? it's suffocating. "look, i get it. your grandma's concerns are valid," a young girl alone in a metropolis, the jujutsu system continuously failing its students. akari understands truly, it's a slippery slope and trust wears thin.

"your village doesn't have an high school, right?" she inquires then, already done her homework about it to be aware she's right - history is circular, and even though akari is relatively new about this whole manager endeavour, she knows a thing or two about it from experience. "mine didn't either, though it was a slightly different situation for me." going to kyōto tech was always in the cards for her, it was everything afterwards that caused more troubles than intended. "point is, even if your grandma would rather have you close ... your education has to continue elsewhere anyway."

"oh totally," he says without hesitation. "at first, anyway. that we came in here without him and took his snacks." he opens a pack of chocolates and offers one to nobara before he pops one into his mouth, glancing towards the door as if megumi might jump out at any moment. "buuut he should've known it was going to happen, right? and i mean, we share snacks all the time !" there's a long pause before he turns back to nobara, brows furrowing. "hey, do you think he's gonna kill us?"

holy, the cleansing fire of teenage girls... it must mark miwa's body as a site of sacrilege (for she has never been inspired to be particularly warm - blooded: rage is not what she calls upon to fight, a difference as stark as hell - fire between herself and the foul - mouthed nobara). even when the foe has passed, it does not stop the blaze of nobara's words. the attention is merely different-- what was once focused on a beast now burns away at miwa. she should be thankful that it is not a hatred that spills from the other girl's mouth, but rather something like worry [ how cute of her underclassman to fret over her! ].

Like bubbles bursting abruptly on the surface of water, his first thought, purely instinctual, was why me. The second thought which developed was who's birthday or what holiday is it? Kugisaki Nobara @waraningyo did not need an excuse to go shopping as her classmates came to find out just a week into her enrollment at Tokyo's Jujutsu Technical School. The girl, however, did specify gift shopping; there were some who considered buying every day things and more superficial items as gift shopping for themselves. Was Itadori Yuuji occupied with that girl, leaving him to be the next best thing?

While their senpais weren't precisely the most outgoing bunch, not to mention one was a panda, even Zen'in Maki would likely be a better shopping companion than a boy who had been called a loner freak and a bully of bullies. As if dealing with his nosy and overly cheerful benefactor wasn't torture enough over the past ten years, now Fushiguro Megumi had to deal with classmates harboring the hunger for his life force like leeches. Dramatic? Perhaps a sprinkle. Simply, he was not accustomed to having friends and people of his age wanting to include him in . . well, anything.

His sister had been his one and only lifeline; the anchor keeping him grounded to any sense of normalcy. Now Tsumiki was — Megumi shook his head as he forced down the urge to summon his Divine Dog, Kuro; he should have stayed in the small domain of his dorm bedroom. The onyx haired teenager moved for the rather dated but still fully functional refrigerator in the communal space's kitchen and removed the slices of oranges he had prepared the day prior. Perfect for a suffocating summer's day.

── ❛ Do I want to know what or who you are buying gifts for? Never mind. ❜

Lower back pressed against the nearest counter as a single orange slice was retrieved from its proper tupperware and placed between lips to strip fruit from peel. He covered his mouth with the back of his hand as he chewed and swallowed. A little awkward. He swallowed thickly, nearly choking on the pull, and then tossed the peel into the compost bin.

── ❛ Itadori is too busy with . . his friend, otherwise you wouldn't have asked me, right? Okay. I'll go just as long as we're not out for the entire day. There is something I need to get. ❜

It had been more than a week since he visited his sister, and the guilt was threatening to rip him apart more violently than at the hands of the King of Curses. He needed to brighten up her room with more flowers and a stuffed animal or two — anything to brighten her day should she wake and to alleviate the growing dread inside his mind.