#wannabesavior

15. Pretend to be their date at an event

"Come on. Help me out. We don’t even have to kiss or anything. I just can’t be seen going to this thing alone, alright? I’d be seen as a loser." Wallace had been invited to some shitty party last minute, meaning he didn’t have a chance to find a hot date yet. Which is kinda bullshit.

☠: A popular fanon headcanon about my character that bugs me

20. Go to the store for them

To: Crybaby

From: Rize

If it's not too much trouble, do you think you can go to the market and get something for me?  Don't worry, I'll pay you back. I'm running low on coffee and I've been meaning to stock up, but I've just been so busy lately. It would be greatly appreciated if you can go out and get some for me.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Yes? No? Say what you want, but if anything, fuckbear was no believer.

He hated healthy food, especially fruits, but ESPECIALLY vegetables-- holy shit, fuck vegetables. Fuck. Vegetables. If anything, he'd rather use them as a weapon. Sharpening carrots to stab small animals with, making elaborate traps with corn and large, large watermelon bombs-- Noin was creative and crafty, good with his hands, had next to nothing to do. Being without much sense of human morality helps as well! When you poke someone's eyes out, you can simply apologize half-heartedly, promise to pay their hospital care bills and bail on their stupid, gullible asses.

So in a way? Apples truly did send you to the doctor, in large numbers, they could mean death. That's what Noin thought of when he bought 87 fucking apples and put them into a large basket, headed to the large, well equipt swimming pool and took up a large, evil grin-- his plans-- they were really LARGE, weren't they! Today felt quite large. Large! Conveniently, Nate Swimtwink, his intended target, seemed to be bobbing his head underwater quite often.

You better watch out, Nate! There he goes, that little Noin, pelting apples at you at an ungodly speed! Look at the wrist on that demon! Wow!