#wallace jackson

I would like to ask the NASA engineer why his prototype space suit needed LASER GUNS.

And why, OH WHY, he would trust his 16 year old nephew in testing it!

Have you ever MET a 16 year old?!

Peter can only look at overeager teen superheroes and think

"Kid you are gonna look back on this one an cringe yourself sideways, trust me."

Laugh track, fade to black, yadda yadda yadda.

Peter's not taking this very seriously.

No matter what kind of suit the kid is packing, he evidently has the combat experience of a truck tire.

These newborn heroes sometimes need someone to show them what game they're playing before they get themselves hurt.

Now let's be clear here, SON.

You fuck around with superpowers. You either shape up and fly right or someone who DOES is gonna force feed you the consequences of your actions.

You can't just fly around slinging laser blasts everywhere, kid!

Someone's bound to get hurt, and more than that it's irresponsible in the EXTREME

"I swear to god, this is why I don't have a sidekick."