#voltron ff

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The medical bay was a cold room, the appearance matching the temperature. Allura stood on the other side of the glass window pane, watching as the garrison doctors busied themselves with the Altean who was still lying unconscious on the table. They moved around her methodically, tapping away on keyboards and scanning through data. Allura’s hands found her hips in an act of nervousness and she fought off the urge to pace.

   She had lost track of just how many times she had found herself here, standing and staring for hours, just waiting desperately for something to happen. She had lost track of how much guilt overwhelmed her when she looked at the Altean, lost track of how many questions she had. It seemed impossible to see another Altean out in the world like this, but every time she thought something was impossible, the universe stepped in to prove her wrong. In her dreams at night, she still saw the moment the robeast opened and revealed the Altean inside. She felt the weight of the shock settle into the depths of her bones, making her feel heavy and weary— leaving her with a sort of tiredness she could never shake.

But then again, it wasn’t just the Altean that made her feel that way, it was the war in general. It was the sleepless nights, the screams of her comrades as they fell prey in the midst of battle. These things made her feel like she actually was ten thousand years old; they made her joints ache when she walked and her heart beat slowly in her chest. It didn’t matter how much sleep she got, she’d come to realize, she would always feel a sort of dense tiredness in the back of her mind, dragging her down. She wondered if she’d ever feel free again.

Lost in her thoughts, she didn’t hear the set of footsteps that came up behind her. It wasn’t until Romelle appeared at her side with a soft exhale that she snapped her thoughts back to the present, never tearing her gaze away from the other Altean.

“You know,” Romelle said with no preamble, her own gaze fixated on the red-headed girl before them, “Luca and I didn’t exactly get along back at the colonies, but I always respected her. She had an inner strength that many don’t. She had the desire to be a part of something greater than herself.”

Allura took in a breath, feeling the way it settled into the bottom of her lungs like a weight. “If she was so desperate for something to believe in, she may have been susceptible to being manipulated.”

She tried to ignore the way the words felt raw as she said them, to ignore the way it felt like salt in an open wound. She tried not to let Lotor’s face flash before her, but she couldn’t stop it. She couldn’t stop the pit of despair that opened up inside of her because she knew how Luca felt, she understood. She had once been so desperate for something to believe in, so desperate just to feel like she belonged somewhere that she had been manipulated. She had opened herself up only to have her heart taken advantage of and tricked— she opened herself up only to be made a fool of and it stung, still cutting as deep as it had the first day. She hated him for it.

More than that, she hated him because she could see his touch in the tragedy that was before her. She could feel his lust for power in the way Luca had come after them without holding back, she could see his obsession in the way she had given her everything, risking her life in the process. Allura could only imagine what Lotor had said to corrupt her, to make her susceptible to the idea that fighting Voltron was the right answer. It wasn’t hard for her to imagine Luca’s hair as white, her skin darker… it wasn’t hard for her to replace Luca with Lotor on that table. The thought haunted her.

He still came to her in her dreams, whispering in her ear the way he had in life. She woke up in a cold sweat most nights, trembling and terrified. The guilt that came with loving him and leaving him was perhaps the heaviest of the guilt she beared. It was perhaps the one that weighed her down the most, the one that she hid at the very depths of her heart. She didn’t like to admit that she had fallen for him and certainly didn’t like to admit that she missed him. That she still longed for him on occasion.

Romelle didn’t say anything in response to her words and she wondered if it was because she, too, understood. She had been a part of the new Altea, she had followed Lotor. The thought made Allura sick and she turned away from the glass, needing a break.

—

Lance was sitting at the table, drink in front of him, stirring idly. Hunk was just inside the door of the room, standing opposite his parents and chatting animatedly with them. Lance had met his parents plenty of times and they were equally as kind as Hunk. He had never once gone to their house for a meal and not left with enough food to feed his own large family. They were warm and welcoming and the kind of family that would welcome Lance for dinner, even if Hunk wasn’t there.

He was only half listening as they chatted, talking about how proud they were of Hunk. Lance was proud of Hunk too— more than he could ever put into words. He’d watched Hunk grow into the defender of the universe that cared for every individual life with the same fervor. He watched Hunk grow into a greater version of himself and it made him feel warm inside.

There were not words to describe how happy Lance was that Hunk had been able to be reunited with his family. He, out of all of them, really deserved it. Lance could feel the slight smile on his lips as he watched Hunk hug his parents and bid them farewell. There was no saying when they’d be back on Earth again, so Lance was happy that Hunk got all the time he wanted with his parents. Once they were gone out of the room, Hunk set down the boxes they had bestowed upon him— no doubt full of ingredients for Hunk to cook with in space— and crossed the room to sit across from Lance at the table.

“Launching tomorrow,” He said, his tone purposefully upbeat. “The big day. Man it feels like forever ago that we piloted the blue lion and were blasted off into space! We had no idea what we were getting into!”

Lance would be lying to say there were no nerves accompanied with the upcoming launch. He had finally been reunited with his family and it was hard for him to willingly let go of them again. Especially since there was no guarantee that he’d ever make it back to Earth— no guarantee that he’d even make it out of the final battle at all. Still, the universe needed him— needed all of them— and he knew it was the greater good that he needed to consider. His family would move on if they had to, as long as he could keep them alive. More than anything else in the universe, Lance wanted to protect those closest to him.

“Yeah,” Lance replied, still stirring his drink. There’d been something weighing on his mind for a long time, and he knew Hunk could sense it.

Still, Hunk tried to distract him. “But everything will be different this time! We’re rugged veterans now! Heading off into our final battle!”

Lance paused his stirring then, glancing up at Hunk. It was strange to think where they had started— just boys at the garrison who had been thrown together by chance. It was weird to think that he, Hunk and Pidge had been thrown together on that first day, having no idea what they were going to go through, that Keith had always been right there, just a step ahead of Lance. Fate had a strange way of working, Lance concluded, as he picked his spoon back up and resumed stirring. He’d spent years by the sides of the people he would defend the universe with and had no idea the entire time that they would ever be so important to him.

“I think that makes us heroes or something, right? The kind of heroes that they make TV shows after! Did you watch it last night, Lance?” Hunk’s smile was huge then and Lance could feel it tugging on his heart strings. “They got you pretty accurate. But they made Coran really serious. And Keith is friendly!” Hunk burst out in laughter then, practically doubling over the table. Lance could feel a smile settling onto his own lips at the thought.

It wasn’t that Keith was unfriendly— not to those around him, at least— it was mostly that he was very quiet and very serious. Still, over the years Lance had watched Keith go from one step ahead of him, to directly next to him. He’d let Keith move from rival to friend to… leader? Lance swallowed.

“They do seem to be hinting at a romance between Keith and Allura though,” Hunk continued once he was finally composed enough to speak again.

“What?!” Lance jolted upright, slamming his hands on the table. “Keith and Allura? It should be Lance and—” He bit off the end of his response, taking a deep breath to try and calm himself down.

There was a knowing twinkle in Hunk’s eye as he looked up at Lance and Lance turned his head to the side to try and avoid acknowledging it. Hunk had been his best friend for years and he could read Lance like a book. And while Lance wasn’t entirely sure how he was about to finish that sentence, the look Hunk was giving him implied that he knew exactly how it was supposed to end. Lance wasn’t sure which option unsettled him more.

“Ooh, a love triangle, I like it.” Hunk’s tone was teasing but it still sent a zing down Lance’s spine.

“That’s not— It’s not about that,” He spluttered, sitting back down again.

“Oh,” Hunk’s expression settled into a soft one, his eyes landing gently on Lance who felt like he’d crumble, even under the tiniest pressure. “You said you were going to talk to Allura but you haven’t yet, have you?”

“I just haven’t found the time,” Lance defended, dropping his head pitifully into his hands. ”Plus she’s been spending all of her time in the med bay. This just isn’t the right time for this. Maybe after—”  

“Lance, it’s our last day on Earth and you have no idea what the future is going to bring. You need to talk to her. You won’t feel better until you do. After tomorrow we’re back out in space fighting the Galra. There is no other time. Literally. ” It sounded great when it came from Hunk like that, but Lance still wasn’t prepared to do it.

It had been chaos in his heart for months— ever since he’d seen Allura with Lotor. Ever since Keith had left for the Blades of Marmora. The two things had combined, chipping away slowly at the defenses Lance kept up around his heart until it was fully exposed and then— well, then they’d broken it. Collectively. In one fell swoop. And Lance hadn’t felt quite right since then. He knew Hunk was right and that he needed to talk to Allura but he hadn’t quite figured out what it was he wanted to say yet. He'd procrastinated it as long as he could, however, and now the deadline was looming over him, making him feel sick.

“You’re talking to her today. And that’s final, young man.” Hunk settled a heavy expression on Lance and he knew that there was absolutely no way Hunk would let him out of it. With a sigh, Lance finally lifted his cup to his lips.

—

The room was filled to the brim with people in their garrison uniforms. The paladins of Voltron stood out amongst the crowd as the only ones with uniquely colored uniforms. They each wore the colors of their paladin armor, defining them as the leaders that they were. They were all seated in a row along one side of the table with the exception of Shiro who stood at the front of the room, addressing the group as a whole. His black uniform and stature commanded the attention of the room and he didn’t shrink away from it. Instead he rose into it, stiffening his spine and looking like he deserved every bit of the respect that he had gained from each person in the room.

“Welcome to our final briefing here on Earth,” He began, his voice booming around the room and causing an immediate hush to fall. “It’s been months since we began to rebuild and tomorrow we take off to continue our liberation efforts to free those who still exist under Galra rule. Commander Holt, give us an update, please.”

All eyes shifted to Sam Holt who was sitting across the table from Lance, looking equally as poised as Shiro. He didn’t seem uncomfortable at all when put on the spot and immediately launched into an answer. “We continue to detect no Galra activity within several galaxies of the milky way. It appears that Earth was Sendak’s only target.”

A chill seemed to spread through the room at those words. Lance would never forget what it had been like when the Galra were on Earth. He’d never be able to wipe away the images of the devastation. No matter how long he lived, the fear that coursed through him when he thought he had lost his sister would haunt him, dragging him down into the depths of those memories mercilessly.

He had seen a lot of planets under Galra rule and a lot of desolation and nothing had ever hurt the way seeing it on Earth had hurt. Up until that point he’d been able to keep at least a little distance, to stop it from following him into his dreams and making his sleep as much of a nightmare as his everyday life could be. But seeing it on Earth changed everything because his family was directly in danger. Hunk’s family was in danger. Everyone he’d gone to school with, his neighbors and lifelong friends… they were all standing in line, trying to avoid the seemingly inevitable. That was the moment the reality of the situation had hit Lance like a robeast, smashing him to the ground and making it impossible for him to get back up.

Shiro held firm, appearing unbothered by the information. Instead, he turned his attention to Keith who was sitting at the very edge of the table, looking sharp in his red uniform. “How are we with Earth’s defenses?”

Keith responded immediately, “I’ve finished my check ins with all the garrison units around the globe and everything appears to be up and running. Earth has everything in place to keep itself safe.”

At those words, the room seemed to let out a collective breath.

“Great,” Next, Shiro directed his attention to Veronica who was standing at his side in front of the crowd. “And Atlas preparations?”

“Repairs to the IGF Atlas were finished early last week and it has since passed every test we have put it through,” Veronica had the signature cocky McClain smile on her lips as she answered, sparing a moment to glance at her brother.

Lance loved seeing his sister take charge like this. He loved seeing her use her brains and her confidence and making a difference in the world. He had been so proud to come home and see the way she had stepped up to the plate in his absence, doing everything she could to protect their family. It still warmed his heart to think about seeing her in her armor, to think about the way she had fought alongside him.

“Good,” Shiro nodded briefly. “Any updates on the Altean pilot?”

Allura jumped in immediately and it only made sense— she was the one who had spent all of her time in there watching over the girl. “Still unresponsive. But she could wake any day now. Perhaps if we had more time, we could find out who sent her—”

“There’s no way to know when or even if she’ll regain consciousness.” Keith’s words were quick but not unkind. Lance was reminded again of what Hunk had told him earlier in the day and he felt woozy in his chair. Taking a deep breath, he leant his head into his hand on the table, trying to just focus on the conversation at hand and ignore the images that were beginning to swirl around in his mind. To ignore the way it made his stomach churn. “We can’t wait any longer. We need to get back out there and end this war before the Galra can reorganize.”

“Keith’s right,” Allura’s frown deepened at Shiro’s words but she didn’t protest. As much as she had a personal interest in the Altean, Lance knew that she was a leader first and foremost and she understood the importance of being out on the battlefield and attacking while their opponent was weak. “Plus, we’ll be in constant communication with Earth. When the Altean wakes up, we’ll know.” He paused then, waiting to see if anyone had any objections. When the room remained silent, he pressed on. “I have one more item to discuss. It’s our last night on Earth and we may not be back for years. So, I’m ordering you… to take some time for yourselves. Be with the ones you love. You’ve earned it.”

There was an undertone of sadness in Shiro’s voice that caused Lance to pick his head up. The rest of the room began to move, emptying out into the hallway but Shiro didn’t move. Lance could feel his heart sink as he watched the people bustle around Shiro, realizing for the first time that Shiro didn’t have anyone to spend the evening with. Once they had returned to Earth after defeating Sendak, Shiro had opened up about his fiance Adam and the fact that he had been a casualty in the war. The way he had spoken was so open and raw that it tore at Lance’s heart, making him ache right alongside Shiro.

It wasn’t hard to believe that Shiro had found love because he was such a great guy, but Lance had never really thought about it. And then, the first time he heard of it, it was a tale of tragic loss and heartbreak. He wasn’t sure he’d ever forget the way the tears filled Shiro’s eyes as he talked about Adam and how kind and understanding he was. He elaborated on how Adam pushed him to be a better person but didn’t put up with any of his troublemaking. It had simultaneously warmed and broken Lance’s heart as he listened to Shrio weave tales of their life together. It was so clear that they had been so in love, that they had the brightest future together and then it had just been ripped away from them. Lance couldn’t possibly imagine what that felt like.

Shiro caught his eye and offered him a weak smile to indicate he was okay. Lance let out a long sigh, feeling like his heart was sinking all the way to his feet. Slowly he stood, nodding briefly at Shiro and heading into the hallway with the others, each step feeling like it took every last drop of Lance’s energy. He could feel the weight of his unspoken words on his shoulders as he finally made it into the hallway, only a few steps behind Allura and Romelle who were already immersed in a conversation about the other Altean.

Hunk popped out behind him a moment later, giving Lance a nudge in the shoulder that was accompanied by a pointed look towards Allura. Lance sucked in a deep breath, “Hey, Allura?”

“What is it, Lance?” She turned to look at him then, her arms tucked behind her. She looked every bit the princess she actually was.

“I, uh, was just checking in. Wanted to see how things were.” He replied lamely.

With a tilt of the head, Allura gently brushed him off. “I’m sorry Lance, I don’t have time for this. I need to be getting back to the med bay.”

Lance didn’t say anything as Allura and Romelle turned together to leave. He watched them take a few steps before turning away, dejected, only to come face-to-face with Hunk who was staring down at him with his arms crossed. Before Lance had a chance to defend himself, Hunk grabbed him by the shoulders and spun him around, shoving his roughly until he stumbled past Allura and Romelle, pinwheeling his arms to maintain his balance.

Once stabilized, Lance swallowed and turned to face them, only to find that they were already staring at him with their eyebrows raised in confusion. “I was just thinking, it might be nice if you came by later and had dinner with me and my family for our last night on Earth. Plus there’s— uh, there’s something I want to talk to you about later.”

Allura glanced to her right and shared a long look with Romelle, “Is everything alright, Lance?”

“Yes!” He replied hastily, “Yes, it’s absolutely fine, If you can’t come, it’s no problem. I understand if you’re busy! I just thought it would be a good way to spend out last night on Earth. I was even going to invite Coran!”

Lance started to turn away, preparing to leave again, but paused when he heard Allura’s response. “Sure, Lance. I’d love to come, that’d be wonderful.”

“Really?”

She was smiling back at him but it looked worried. He wondered if she could sense what he wanted to talk to her about. “Really, thank you for the invite. I’ll absolutely be there.”

“Great,” He smiled at her and it came easier to him than he expected. “I’ll see you later tonight, then.”

With a nod, she and Romelle headed off again, immediately dropping back into their conversation.

“Well,” Hunk said, clapping Lance on the shoulder. “That’s one of the two down. Now you just have to talk to the other one.”

—

Pidge liked the greenhouse. Not as much as her mom did, of course, but she still found a sort of comfort there. Maybe it was because the scent reminded her of home, or because she had grown up around one with her mom, she wasn’t sure. But either way, as she went around, scanning each plant, she found herself comfortably at ease. Her mom was working a few rows behind her, checking the soil and inspecting the leaves as she went from pot to pot.

“Pidge? Do you have a moment?”

Pidge glanced up from the screen in her hand to find Romelle and Allura peeking around the corner from the hallway into the greenhouse. Surprised, Pidge pushed her glasses up the bridge of her nose and lowered the small device in her hand. “Of course, what’s up?”

“Well, you see, I…” Allura stepped into the room first, fidgeting with her hands in front of her. It was strange for Pidge to see Allura be anything other than completely composed and confident. “I, uh…”

“She has a date!” Romelle chimed in, leaning forward to wrap an arm around Allura’s shoulders.

“It’s not a date!” Allura replied quickly, steadying herself against Romelle’s weight. “It’s definitely not a date. But I am having dinner with Lance and his family and I would like to dress in appropriate Earth attire.”

“That sure sounds like a date,” Pidge replied, waggling her eyebrows.

Instead of the expected response, Allura frowned. “No, he seemed hesitant. He said he needed to talk to me about something after. It’s not a date, but it still seemed important.” she paused for a moment before adding “Plus, he said he's inviting Coran. So that's definitely not a date.”

“Well,” Pidge glanced back at her mom who was working diligently but still clearly listening to the conversation they were having. “I’d love to go to the mall with you, but I’m grounded.”

“Grounded?” Romelle repeated, leaning forward to look closer at Pidge’s feet. “I didn’t know humans could float!”

That startled a laugh out of Pidge who shook her head, “No, not literally. It means I can’t leave my mom’s supervision.”

“Yes,” Colleen piped up from her corner of the room, still not raising her eyes from the plant in front of her. “She’s in trouble because apparently she thinks it’s okay to just flee the galaxy and go off exploring the universe without telling me!”

“I was helping save the entire universe, you know!” Pidge retorted with a dramatic eye roll.

Allura looked between Pidge and Colleen for a moment before finally choosing to address Colleen. “May I please borrow your daughter just for a few hours so that we can go to the mall? I promise to bring her right back.”

With a moment of consideration, Colleen sighed. “Only this once. And she can only be gone for two hours. Got it?”

Pidge was already halfway out the door, dragging Allura and Romelle behind her.

—

Before he had the chance to lose his nerve, Lance knocked on the door to Coran’s room. The door opened automatically under his fingers, revealing Coran on the inside folding some clothes.

“Oh, Lance! To what do I owe this visit?” Coran didn’t halt from what he was doing as Lance stepped into the room.

Emotions were swirling around in Lance’s stomach, giving him that uneasy feeling again. He hated it. “Hey, Coran. I just wanted to stop by really quick and invite you to dinner with my family tonight. I’ve already invited Allura and she’s agreed. I just thought, you know, it might be a nice way to spend our last night on Earth.”

Coran was looking at Lance in a way that made him feel incredibly unnerved. It was like Coran wasn’t seeing him as much as he was seeing through him. It almost felt like Coran was assessing the very depths of his heart, reading the words he had hidden there, tucked away in the shadows. A long moment passed where Coran said nothing and Lance spent the entire time feeling as if he were being laid bare, every secret being drawn from him and put on display for Coran to do with as he pleased.

“You said you’re having Allura over for dinner?” Coran cried suddenly, stepping forward to grip Lance by the shoulders.

“Well, yeah.” Lance, a little taken aback, tried to step slightly further form Coran but the man’s grip was too tight to let him go anywhere. “And I thought you might—”

“Give you my blessing? Not yet, I won’t! I need at least three references to your character before I’ll even consider giving it to you. Plus, I’ll need—”

Lance cut him off suddenly, “Blessing? For what? Coran, we’re just having dinner and you’re invited. It’s not anything serious.”

“It’s not?” A dumbfounded look settled on Coran’s features then. “It sounds like a date.”

“Woah, woah, woah, there.” Lance held up his hands in between them hastily. “It is definitely not a date. It’s just dinner on our last night on Earth. You can come if you want to or stay here, I just want to know.”

There was a suspicious look in Coran’s eye suddenly as his hands tightened around Lance’s shoulders, dragging him further into the room.

—

The mall was packed with people which wasn’t surprising seeing as it had just reopened. The stores weren’t all set up properly yet and a lot of merchants instead had their prizes out on blankets on the floor. Pidge glanced from side to side as she walked, scanning over the wares that were for sale as they passed. There was an assortment of things— from homegoods to handmade trinkets— but nothing matching what they needed. Finally they came across a clothing store and Pidge led the way inside.

Veronica and Leifsdotter had joined as soon as they had heard that the mall was their destination. At first Allura had been a little unsure but Veronica would be there for dinner tonight so she would be able to help Allura pick an outfit that her family found most appropriate, which was comforting. Once inside the store, the five of them split up and began to scan the racks of clothes on their own, each picking out individual outfits for Allura to try on.

Once they were each satisfied with an outfit, they passed them over to Allura who took each into a nearby dressing room and began to try them on. She came out in between each outfit to show the group but nobody approved of any of the outfits. Feeling nearly defeated, Allura stepped back in the dressing room to try on the final outfit. It was the simplest of all of them, a beautifully simple white dress with a gold belt and some gold sandals to match. As soon as she put it on, she felt beautiful.

“Oh, Allura,” Pidge said as she exited the dressing room one last time. “It’s perfect.”

Veronica was nodding her approval, “It looks great on you. The whole family is going to love it!”

“Are you sure?” Allura spun to look at herself in the nearby mirror, twisting from side to side in an attempt to see all angles.

Veronica stepped up next to her, placing a hand on her shoulder, “I’m positive.”

—

Shiro, Sam and Coran stood in a line, staring through the glass window and into the med bay. On the mat, Luca was sitting up, her eyes downcast and body wrapped into a tight ball.

“She’s medically stable,” Sam was saying, “But she refuses to talk to any of the doctors. I was hoping a friendly face might help. Maybe Romelle?”

Coran didn’t tear his eyes away from the scene before him as he answered with a simple, “I’ll see if I can find her,”

There was an unnerving air of uncertainty hanging between all of them as they watched Luca sit there, eyes fixated on nothing.

—

The Black lion always looked grandeur, towering magnificently above the rest of the world, and this was no exception. He was seated out in the open, the facing the setting sun. As Lance approached, he couldn’t help but have his breath stolen by the sheer beauty of the entire thing— Black poised beautifully in front of the fading yellows and oranges of the last sunset he’d see on earth for awhile. He tried not to let his heart ache too much as he scaled Black to reach the top where Keith sat.

He knew Keith would be able to hear him a mile away with all the clattering and clanging he was doing as he climbed but he didn’t care. It had taken him longer than he would have liked to locate Keith but he knew that’s exactly how Keith wanted it to be. Even after all of this time, if Keith wanted his space, he was going to take it.

Lance finally climbed over the top ledge and steadied himself, finding Keith and Kosmo sitting and staring peacefully towards the sunset. “You know, you can be a hard man to find if you want to be.”

“Hey, Lance.” Keith glanced at him and then did a double take, “Woah! What are you wearing?”

With a sigh, Lance pulled the metal bucket off of his head and let it drop onto Black with a clunk. “Coran never listens,” he offered in lieu of an explanation. When Keith continued to stare wide-eyed at him, he gave in and gave a better answer. “I invited Allura to dinner with my family tonight and I went to invite Coran, too, but he mistook it as a date and insisted that I have something resembling proper Altean armor to wear.”

There was a smile immediately curling at the edge of Keith’s lips as he watched Lance sit down in the ridiculous outfit Coran had fashioned for him. It didn’t even look like clothes, it looked like a bunch of random items Coran had thrown together— which, essentially, it was. “You have to wear a pail on your head to go on a date with Allura?”

“Apparently,” Lance replied wearily. “But it’s not a date. And I kept saying that but he wouldn’t listen.”

“Dinner with your family sounds like a date,” Keith replied.

Lance shook his head, “It’s just dinner. Really.”

Keith, seeming unconvinced, turned back towards the sunset. There was still a small smile on his face as he teased Lance. “I guess that does make sense. To go out with you, she’d need to like you. The annoying, stupid, Earth version of you.”

“Very funny,” Lance sneered, just as playfully, settling back onto his hands. They sat in silence for a few moments, each just looking out at the sunset.

It wasn’t long before Lance’s attention drifted and, instead of looking at the sunset, he watched Keith watch the sunset. The soft colors of the fading light made Keith’s edges hazy, as if he were blurring into the sky itself. Somehow that seemed fitting to Lance, because Keith had always belonged to something bigger and better— he had always belonged to the universe itself. The uneasiness swirled around in Lance’s stomach again but he tried to ignore it. It was normal, he reasoned, given that they were heading out to start on their final quest in the morning. It was reasonable to feel this way. But still…

“Hey, so, I came up here for a reason.” Lance finally broke the silence, glancing past Keith to Kosmo who was staring intently back at Lance.

“Yeah,” Keith looked so at ease, as if the fading light of twilight was his element. He seemed to shine just as bright during all hours of the day but Lance could still appreciate the moment. “I figured as much.”

“I wanted to talk to you about something.” The nerves were a jittery feeling under Lance’s skin, making him anxious. He knew he’d feel this exact way later with Allura and just hoped that, in both cases, it would be worth it.

Keith glanced away from the sunset briefly to meet Lance’s gaze, “So talk.”

“Well, we leave Earth tomorrow and then, from there, everything is uncertain. So, before we go, I just wanted to take the chance to make something clear.” Lance cleared his throat and looked down. He stared intently at Keith’s feet as he spoke, willing himself to just get the words out. “I meant every word I said on that stupid game show, about you being the future. I really think you are. And no matter what happens, I’m going to be there with you, okay? You’re my leader and I’m not going to leave you.”

Without looking up, Lance could picture the expression on Keith’s face. It wasn't hard to imagine Keith's eyebrows up in surprise, his mouth parted as he stared at Lance. He could practically feel the weight of his gaze burning into the side of his head, but still, he stared at Keith’s shoes. He only looked up out of surprise when Keith spoke and his voice was almost raw with emotion.

“I’m sorry for what I said then,” Keith’s gaze was on Lance, pinning him down. Their eyes locked as Keith talked and Lance knew that he couldn’t break away no matter how hard he tried. But he didn’t try at all because he didn’t want to be anywhere else. “I meant what I said, but I didn't mean how it sounded. Does that make sense?” Lance stared back, wide-eyed, and that seemed to be enough for Keith to press on. “I meant it when I said I didn't want to be stuck there with you forever. Not because I didn't want to be with you but because I didn't want you to be there forever. I wanted you to get home and see your family. I wanted you, our sharpshooter, to carry on the fight. If there was anyone who deserved to get out of that mess, it was you. So I really didn't want to be stuck there with you. I wanted to be stuck there, knowing you were free, thriving and changing the universe in the way that only you can.”

“I—” Lance wasn’t sure what to say. He snapped his mouth shut, staring at Keith and willing himself to just keep composed. “Thanks, man.”

After what felt like eternity, Keith broke their gaze, turning away. Lance wasn’t sure if it was the setting sun, but Keith’s cheeks looked a shade darker as he said, “We’re all a team and we're all working to protect the universe. But you and I? We’ve got each other’s backs no matter what.”

“No matter what,” Lance confirmed, feeling a heat rush to his cheeks too. Before he lost his nerve he added, “I’m glad you’re back from the Blades. I wouldn’t want to do this without you.”

Kosmo nudged his nose against Keith’s knee then and Keith raised a hand to stroke it along his soft head. “I’m sorry for that, too. I’m sorry for a lot of things. I—”

“No apologies,” Lance interrupted. “Not right now, at least. This is our last night on Earth and I want it to be special. So no apologies. Just… don’t leave me again, okay?”

“I won’t,” Keith’s words faded with the light but Lance still heard them and tucked them away in the back corners of his heart. “Never again.”

Lance let the silence between them resume, feeling a weight lifted off of his chest. He often had nightmares of the game show, of the way he'd practically laid his heart on the line only to have Keith shut it down. Keith's response, tight-lipped and arms crossed, had haunted Lance ever since. He'd considered bringing it up numerous times but never had because he thought he knew the answer. He smiled a little to himself, thinking of how Keith never failed to surprise him.

A few more moments passed and the sun was almost completely below the horizon. Lance needed to get going if he was going to make dinner on time. He stood, scooping his bucket up off of Black. He took a few steps and then paused, glancing back at Keith who still looked stoic and peaceful.

“Hey, Keith?” He pressed on when Keith hummed in acknowledgement. “Since we're doing this whole honesty thing, I have another question.”

“Okay?”

The question sprung to the tip of Lance's tongue but he hesitated. He and Keith had gotten close right before Keith left. Since he'd come back, things were good but not the way they had been before. There was still a sort of hollowness in Lance's chest, stealing away his courage. But he knew this was his chance to ask and he'd never stop wondering.

“Have you ever been in love?”

He expected Keith to flinch, to pull away and deny it, shutting the question down entirely. Instead, Keith smiled slightly, his eyes going soft as he watched the trailing ends of the sunset fade into darkness. “Yeah, once.”

Lance, surprised by this answer, couldn't stop the next question from jumping off his lips. “What happened?”

“Nothing, but it never faded away. ” Keith's reply was soft, drifting away on the breeze that flew by. Lance wanted to ask more, to prod and see who had won Keith's heart. But Keith was staring off at the horizon, eyes foggy and Lance could already tell that he was lost to his memories. So he climbed down Black slowly and vowed to ask some other time.

—

Veronica was opening the door as Lance descended the stairs. He was dressed in nice khakis and a button up on under his sweater with the sleeves rolled up. It’d been a long time since he’d worn anything other than Paladin armor or the garrison uniform and it honestly felt good to be in something normal again. He finished descending the stairs quickly, stopping in front of Allura who had just stepped into the house.

“You look… beautiful,” He said, taking in her appearance. She was dressed in normal Earth clothes and it looked so different and yet very stunning at the same time.

“So do you,” Allura replied kindly, smiling at Lance.

A moment passed before Lance’s manners caught up with him. “Ah, I’m so sorry!” He spun around and began to introduce Allura to each member of his family, pointing them out as he gave their name. He knew he had a large family and in no way expected Allura to remember their names, but she greeted each one individually, repeating their names and smiling at them. It made Lance smile.

Once the introductions were done, they were ushered into the dining room where all the food had already been prepared and was laying out waiting for them. They took their seats around the table, Lance seated between Veronica and Allura. As they ate, his siblings immediately launched into endless embarrassing stories of Lance as a child, doing their best to make it as dramatic as possible. Allura laughed with each tale, glancing at Lance and trying to bite back her grin. He didn’t mind, of course, because that was what siblings did and he was just grateful to be home with his siblings at all.

“Oh, by the way.” Veronica nudged him with her elbow, “I’ve been meaning to ask you. Think you could put in a good word for me with your long haired friend?”

“Keith?” Lance cried, incredulous, feeling his heart tumble to his feet. “No, no, no! No way, absolutely not. Plus, he's in love with someone already.” the words slipped off his tongue before he had much of a chance to think about them. Veronica made a surprised face, but it wasn't enough to distract Lance from the gaping hole that was opening up inside his chest.

“I was kidding, but that's good to know.” Veronica replied with a knowing look, turning back to her dinner.

For the rest of the meal, Lance was left to try and quell the strange panicky feeling filling his chest.

—

The doors to the med bay slid open, granting Romelle access. It was almost strange to walk through them since she had spent weeks standing on the outside staring in. Still, she could see Luca sitting up and alert on the table and knew that she had to go in and try.

“It’s good to see you awake, Luca.” Romelle said as soon as she entered through, “We can help, you know. What happened to you? Where’s the colony?”

Luca snapped her head up suddenly, her eyes ferocious. Romelle felt a chill spread across her body, freezing her to her very core at the look. “Why?” Luca all but spat, “So you can betray them again?”

“What?”

“She told us all about you and your great betrayal,” Luca’s eyes were hard with anger, her body rigid. “You sided with the Paladins of Voltron, the ones who killed our great leader.”

“It’s not like that—” Romelle tried, taking another step into the room, but Luca wasn’t done.

“She’s going to reunite us with Lotor! With Altea! There’s nothing you can do! You don’t stand a chance against Honerva—” Luca’s words were cut short. Suddenly she gasped, her eyes going wide. Her entire body seemed to go stiff for a brief moment before falling over, completely limp.

Romelle rushed forward but she could tell, even before reaching Luca, that it was too late.

—

The cool air nipped at Lance’s cheeks and exposed wrists. It felt good as he and Allura walked along the sidewalk, heading towards his favorite tree in what used to be his favorite park. Dinner had gone well, even though he could tell Allura felt out of place. He still didn’t know too much about her life ten-thousand years ago and whether she had grown up around a lot of people or not. He understood that his family could be overwhelming at times and he just hoped they hadn’t scared her off.

“This place used to be so beautiful,” Lance said, tucking his hands deep into his pockets. He wasn’t cold but the action somehow made him feel more secure.

“This is all my fault,” Allura walked past Lance and stopped in front of the large tree that loomed before them, placing her hand gently against the trunk. “The Galra were here because of me.”

“That’s not true,” Lance said, “Plus, meeting you is one of the best things to ever happen to me. I wouldn’t change it, even if I could.”

Instead of answering, Allura closed her eyes and suddenly the tree was glowing blue. Lance had seen her use her powers before, but it never ceased to amaze him. He watched the light spread up the tree and out to the branches, mouth parting in wonder as leaves began to grow, filling out the canopy above. The light pressed on, spreading out past the tree and suddenly flowers were blooming around Lance and the grass was greener. He couldn’t help the smile that came to his face as he watched.

After a moment, Allura opened her eyes and turned to look at Lance. The rest of the night was completely silent and there was no movement save for the two of them.

With a deep breath, Lance met her gaze head on. “Allura, I’ve always admired you. For a long time, I was completely in love with you.”

“Lance—”

“Please,” He interrupted, “Let me finish.” She inclined her head slightly in acknowledgement and he pressed on, “You’re beautiful, but you’re so much more than that. You’re smart, you’re brave, you’re completely independent. You’re an amazing woman, Allura, and there was no way that I could know you and not fall in love with you. But—” he paused and caught her eye again, “But you deserve more than I can give you and I know that. I saw you with Lotor, I saw the way he made you happy, the way he understood and completed sides of you that I can never even relate to. As much as I want to be everything to you, I know I can’t be and I accept that. Because you deserve the best, Allura. You really do.”

He could see the emotion clear on her face as she looked at him across the dusky night. “Lance,” She breathed his name in a way that was so soft, it made Lance feel like he was going to break. He had meant every word— she deserved everything and he knew that he couldn’t give it to her. “You’re such an amazing guy— so caring and selfless. Anyone would be lucky to have your heart. It’s just, I—”

“I know, Allura.” His words were gentle and his smile was weak but genuine. “You don’t need to say it, I understand. I’m not asking for anything from you. I just needed you to know, in case anything goes wrong on this next mission, that I loved you for a long time. “

Tears were pooling in Allura’s eyes and Lance wanted to cross the space between them to wipe them away, but he didn’t. Despite breaking his own heart, he felt a weight being lifted off his chest. He’d been carrying those feelings around, bearing the burden of them alone, for so long. He forgot what it felt like to walk around without that secret bubbling just under the surface, threatening to spill over. Even when he'd started to get over her, started to bury the feelings and moved on, he felt chained. He knew, even if those feelings were slowly beginning to fade, that he would never be free of them until he told her.

Allura rushed to him then, practically knocking him over as she threw her arms around his shoulders and pulled him close. Lance slid his hands around her waist, holding on to her and relishing in the feeling of being close to her. It reminded him of the hug he shared with her after Lotor had just broken her heart. He remembered that hug vividly. Even though he'd been comforting her, that hug had felt like a goodbye. This hug felt like a goodbye too.

“Lance, I want you to know that you’re important to me,” Allura breathed into his shoulder, the words muffled by his sweater. “And to the cause.”

“I know,” Lance’s reply was solemn, but he couldn’t bring himself to feel sad. “Nothing is going to change between us, okay? Everything is going to be the same. I just— I couldn’t risk dying without you knowing.”

A moment passed before Allura pulled away, lifting a hand to brace it gently against his cheek. Lance took a deep breath at the contact. “Are you going to be alright?”

“I am,” Lance said and, even though the words hurt, even though it felt like he was ripping each one out of his very own soul, he meant them. Because no matter what happened, he would pull through. As long as Allura got the kind of love she deserved, he would be happy. Plus, the emptiness in his chest decreased a little each day. Slowly the ache was becoming duller and he knew, eventually, he'd be able to watch Allura and feel only happiness— no bitterness, no loneliness. And someday he'd find someone for himself, too.

—

Allura returned to her room at the garrison that night feeling a strange weight settle in her chest. Before she had much time to think about it, the doors to her room slid open to reveal Coran and Romelle sitting there, waiting for her. She didn’t even have to ask to know what they were about to tell her. Still, she didn’t like hearing it said out loud.

“Luca didn’t make it,” Romelle broke the silence. “I tried to talk to her, she said she was sent by Honerva. Only got a few sentences in before…”

“Before?” Allura prompted when Romelle didn’t continue.

“Princess,” Coran stepped forward, “It looks as if her brain was fried.”

“By Honerva?”

“We don’t know,” Romelle admitted, “But we think so.”

Allura crossed all the way into her room and took a seat on the bed, trying to let this new information sink into her head. Suddenly everything else she’d been worried about was gone and all she could think about was this. Honerva had sent Luca? While it was true that Lotor was gone, trapped in the quintessence field for eternity, Allura had always assumed this was something he had set into motion before that. Lotor was certainly clever and cunning enough to plan this far ahead.

“Also, you should know,” Romelle looked as if she didn't want to finish her sentence. But she did anyways. “She said Honerva was going to reunite them with Lotor.”

Allura's heart dropped, her stomach plummeting alongside it. If things had felt wrong before, now they felt like a downright catastrophe. The idea of seeing Lotor again was nothing short of unimaginable. Allura bit the edge of her lip, knowing that deep down, in the very depths of her soul, she wouldn't be able to resist Lotor if she saw him again. Her entire heart still yearned for him, straining against her ribs, painfully reminding her of the way he'd really seen her and had loved her for it. Or so she'd thought.

Quickly she stood back from the bed and headed down the hall towards the conference room where Shiro could most frequently be found. Romelle and Coran followed quick on her heels.

Sure enough, as the doors to the conference room opened, Allura could see the black of Shiro’s uniform on the other side. She approached him quickly, and he turned to look at her as he heard her footsteps. He looked concerned as she explained to him what Romelle had told her, doing her best to not sound unnerved.

“We need to come up with a new plan,” She insisted at the end.

Shiro shook his head, “If Honerva really did send her, we won’t have to go looking for her. I’m sure we’ll just find her along the way.”

Allura tried to ignore the chill that came with her next words because she knew they were true, “Or she’ll find us.”

—