ok so status

new low voice range: exists. interesting af. still hinky and unreliable and ~nothing i know about projection and support from my lyric mezzo past helps, bc it’s not just a different procedure but one i don’t have a mental model for — trying, rationally and cognitively, to project correctly is like i’m a character in Flatland trying to point at the n+1th dimension. my current plan is stop trying to think about it and wing it, like shower, spotify, bad karaoke, whatever to develop a stock of sense memories, not just song by song but literally phrase by phrase. (like trying to learn a language by talking in it instead of studying grammar and syntax, which i’m very resistant to wrt languages but this is different.) anyway though fuck alla dat: the real point is that johnny cash is now like eighty percent sing-along-able and i’m the fucking king of the world about it. where did this even come from, the men in my immediate family are very high tenors? i don’t think it’s settled enough to label, and, like, 360 idk here, but my money is firmly on baritone

medium-high voice range: back from the war. i’ve mostly stopped getting that thing where i go to sing and got silence. the high end is probably still gone, but i was jealous of the altos and not the coloraturas my whole life so i’m cool with it; the temptation to karaoke “wuthering heights” was a curse i’m well rid of tbh. it’s bedraggled and fucked up and needs intensive rehab but i think it’ll be okay

but between the two? there lies an uncanny no-man’s-land

theoretically i could sing both parts of “henry lee” now, but i wouldn’t dare. i can’t get from low to high range or vice versa without some sort of hard reset that may or may not be executable in the v short time between two verses

this seems to be a stage people go through. i found a reddit post that described it acutely. so yeah. midrange transition from chest to head is not currently functional

so and but i think i might’ve just found one weird trick to train the problem away

“in dreams” by roy orbison

starts low and climbs high and then higher with a lot of swooping and sliding: therapeutically it feels exactly on point. i’m gonna do some shower exercises with it. rip my roommate and the neighbors