#valtameri

“I bet he is” she smiled at him, getting ready to soak her clothes. Washing the dishes was an activity that she didn’t really remember doing — that is if she ever did it. Yunho seemed to notice how her eyes reflected confusion upon looking at the different items in front of her, all available to use for her chore.

He chuckled when her lips puckered up in a cute pout “Let me do the washing, you can dry them and put them away”

At first, their silence was comfortable. Y/n was extremely focused on learning how to wash the dishes for future occasions, so as soon as she finished drying each item, her eyes went back to following Yunho’s hands, all covered in soap and bubbles. “Does it look easy?” he mumbled, giving her a side look.

“It looks like I might destroy them if that soap is as slippery as it seems” she giggled, reaching out to get firsthand familiarity with such an ordinary feeling. Y/n held her breath and hoped that the electricity that she experienced running down her spine when her fingertips caressed Yunho’s palm was part of the sensation that every mortal being felt when touching the bubbles. The young pirate’s cheeks got a subtle peach color that y/n thought fitted him extremely well — and to that sudden mind statement, she contorted her face back to the confused glace. “Yunho, I… these past few days have been really weird”

“Wh-what do you mean?” leaving the last couple of glasses over the sink for later, he wiped his hands and turned fully to her. His soft-looking lips were slightly pressed as if he was waiting for an answer he already knew but was afraid to hear.

“Between us” y/n sighed and looked at him with the confidence she wasn’t aware of having. “All I know about me comes from Wooyoung, and it’s not much to say. He is helping me because he is the one who supposedly knows me well out of all eight of you. But why does it feel like you and I share more than what a couple of strangers would?”

“So you feel it too” Yunho’s voice was almost inaudible like his speaking abilities were hanging by a thread.

“Is there an explanation to it?”

As of now, the silence was not of the comfortable kind. There they were, two strangers — well, two acquaintances — who were more than acquaintances but none of them really knew why. They were now extremely conscious of how blurry their past looked for themselves, and they had abruptly revealed that to one another.

The way in which Yunho’s face fell made her want to cry. It felt like a wave of his flooding emotions was suddenly hitting her with full force, and the bond which seemed to have always been there was slowly reaching the surface.

“So you are as clueless as I am about your own identity, huh?” she mumbled, suddenly too overwhelmed to look at him in the eye.

Yunho had always been clueless about many things in his life. It was a part of him of whom he was constantly ashamed of revisiting every time his demons haunted him at night because he was sure that if there was only one thing that everyone on board of the Destiny had was a sense of identity. They all were sons, brothers, nephews, cousins — they had a family to go back to whenever they were in need. And although ATEEZ was his chosen family, as all eight had silently and affectionately decided — Yunho was still some stray boy. The stray boy.

“The first thing I remember about me is being a kid playing around with Hongjoong, up and down the shore of the island where he and his family resided many years ago. His father was the one who found me and took me home with him. They practically adopted me for nearly ten years, right until we were entirely sure of creating and becoming the pirate crew we are now” Yunho took a seat and y/n followed him, too lost in his tale to not pay attention “Captain’s dad has never said a word of the day he found me. He’s the only one who might know something of my past, yet… he has multiple times refused to tell me or anyone what happened that day. Hongjoong is extremely upset about it and is rare when it comes to him, but I think he resents his father a little” the young man mumbled, looking at his now dried hands as if trying to avoid y/n’s burning gaze.

“Why don’t you?”

“How do you know I don’t resent him?” he weakly chuckled.

“You’re too good, Yunho” she dimly smiled. “You do not resent that man even if he has the power to change the whole course of your life. I mean, he saved you. He gave you what you might see as an identity.”

“Are you craving one too?” Yunho asked, now courageous enough to connect his eyes back with hers, but still afraid of feeling those unknown sensations.

“I think it’s more of an I-know-I-have-an-identity-so-I-have-to-find-it thing, and having you guys it’s making it both, easier and harder. It looks like you are to me what Captain’s father is to you”

“If you ever need help…” the cooper mumbled, scratching the back of his neck as he stood up, suddenly feeling shy “I mean, I know we are not supposed to tell you anything but I am too aware of how awful and frustrating it feels to rely on a weak memory to get back your own self so…”

“Thank you, Yunho” y/n gave him a radiant smile in an attempt to show him how grateful she was “Tonight has helped me a lot”

The tight, warm embrace that they shared afterward made her realize how crucial Yunho was to the puzzle that was her life now. Their conversation was not only something she didn’t know she needed, but the perfect starting point she had been missing all those days on board. She had clues, puzzle pieces — but she didn’t know what kind of puzzle she was putting together. Her previous self? Her essence? The place and people she used to know? It was too overwhelming to choose one. But she had failed to realize that none of those mattered because she would still be missing the most vital aspect: her identity.

“Damn”

Feeling weak was not what bothered him the most. The fact that his crewmate was suddenly becoming what he thought he was to her had been clouding his mind for the last 24 hours. Yunho and y/n had been too deep in conversation ever since he almost got eaten up by the evil sirens, and it was slowly getting to his confidence, to his pride, and most importantly, to his heart.

“Hi there”

The sweetness of the voice behind him took him out of his trance, making him realize he was about to destroy the belaying pin he was supposed to fix. Ever since the siren’s attack, all of the belaying pins around the Destiny’s railings had been jeopardizing the whole safety of the pirate ship, and he was the only one who properly understood how to actually repair them, so after recovering from his almost endless slumber, he got back to work.

“Hi” he mumbled, ignoring how his heart rate swiftly increased, but feeling too betrayed to demonstrate the power she had over him.

“How are you feeling?” y/n pushed, her sweet smile never leaving her now rosy lips. All of the dryness and little cuts were finally gone.

“Good”

“Hum… okay” her voice sounded too tiny now, like Wooyoung’s arid attitude towards her was evidently clear not to grasp. “If you need me I’ll be helping Seonghwa, he’s sorting out his medici-”

“Amazing”

The pout on y/n’s lips was too grand not to notice, so the oldest pirate had to ask.

“Wooyoung is acting like I did something to him, and I don’t have a clue of what it might be!” she complained through her pursed lips.

“Well, what have you been up to today?” Seonghwa questioned, taking a cardboard box out of a small wooden drawer and shoving small jars containing different colored substances into it.

“I helped Yunho with his barrels all morning and some hours after lunch. I felt tired so he suggested I took a nap and I did just that. Hongjoong called me to ask about my progressions, and then… that’s it” she lifted her shoulders in a shrug.

Seonghwa looked at her like she had a third eye, and y/n suddenly felt too stupid to follow.

“So you are telling me that you practically spent the whole day with Yunho” the doctor repeated “and now you don’t expect Wooyoung to be jealous?” he laughed, too stunned to notice her confusion.

“But why?”

The sincerity with which the words went out of her lips made Seonghwa realize that he was the one being too stupid to follow. She has no memory, idiot.

“Right” he facepalmed and suppressed the urge to curse at Wooyoung in front of her “He’s just exploring life around you, y/n. He needs time to adjust to the new… environment” Seonghwa had to curse at himself instead because, with every sentence that he uttered, he felt more of an idiot than he already was.

“Oh” the young woman mumbled, playing with the ends of her disheveled dark blue hair “I guess I have to talk to him and fix it”

The encouraging smile that the cook gave her was all she needed to wave him goodbye and go back to the main deck, the last place where she had seen the boatswain working with his overused tools. The ship was too quiet for her liking, and although it was somehow reasonable as the sun went down, navigating those dark waters made it way scarier. She needed the life and cheerfulness that those eight amiable pirates provided to the Destiny.

The growing darkness that surrounded y/n made her feel anxious, and with each passing second, more and more tiny on board. No one seemed to be near, not even a scream away. The moon was not enough of a lighthouse, heavy clouds hiding the potent shine she was capable of bestowing. A sudden lump blocked y/n’s throat and a chilly breeze prevented her from moving at all. She was frozen in her spot, terrified and alone. Where were the pirates she was so used to seeing everywhere by that point?

“INSIDE! ALL INSIDE!”

The piercing yell took her out of her petrified state, making her look around frenetically for its owner. No one was there, she was all alone. What was happening?

“ALL INSIDE, NOW!”

Desperation took over her throat, the lump increasingly bothering her with its size and itchiness. She wanted to scream but she couldn’t. Her eyes were clouded with thick fog — and now, with tears. Y/n felt like she was about to pass out when a pair of calloused hands wrapped around her arms and pressed her against a warm chest. The familiar scent brought her back to her senses, frantically breathing for air as if she had just been saved from drowning.

“TO MY CABIN!”

“Wh-wha…” her voice was too weak, the lump not leaving her throat quite yet.

“It’s Medora”

As Wooyoung rushed her to his and San’s cabin, y/n’s mind was too clouded to understand what that name meant, or even think back and reflect on her knowledge regarding the matter.

That night, however, she was about to learn about it… and not the easy way.

next ↬ chapter x — coming soon.

and i'm baaaaack!!! hope you enjoy, i'll be so happy to hear from you and your thoughts on the new chapter!!!

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