Ritual 101
I wanted to put together a write up on ideas for the self-validation ritual part of my #ValidationDayTarotChallenge but it wound up being pretty generalizable. So instead hereās my thoughts on how I create rituals for just about any occasion.
Your Why
I think the first and most important step is to figure out why youāre doing the ritual. It can be as simple or complicated as you need.
Sometimes my why is straightforward - to celebrate a holiday or to work with a deity.
And other times itās more personal and complicated - to initiate myself into a new phase of my practice or mourn the death of a former self.
In both cases though, my why drives all other components of the ritual.
Iāll also jot down anything that might be really important to me during this phase that I want to keep in mind. When I was living with my parents and I was in the broom closet about my practice, I would make note of what constraints I had to work with ā had to be done after parents when to bed, had to be easily assembled and discarded without notice. These days Iām much more likely to jot down things like āIām fucking tired all the time, keep it shortā or āHands arenāt working great, keep it simpleā. Ā
Very occasionally in this stage Iāll notice my why conflicts with my constraints. If my energy is low, it might not be a great time to do much transformational work no matter how much Iād like to. Easier to think through that here than half way through performing it.
Cleansing
I personally think physically cleansing is important no matter what kind of ritual Iām performing. My why will guide how I go about it. If the ritual is a more regular one, I might only wash my hands and my face. Sometimes I light a candle, turn the lights off, and take a shower. The dark helps me concentrate on getting rid of unhelpful energy so I donāt bring it into the ritual space. Very occasionally Iāll take a ritual bath.
Cleansing really is key for me because it helps prepare me mentally and it delineates the mundane from the sacred. In less elegant terms, I like washing off because I donāt want to be thinking about whether my carās gonna get fixed in time for this weekend or if I paid the bills while Iām trying to contact a goddess to help bring forth my shadow so that I might embrace it. I respect that division might not be relevant for everyone though so your mileage may vary. Ā
Ambiance
Lighting is so helpful in ritual. I prefer to do my rituals at night if I can swing it. It just feels like the right time to be doing witchy things. I like to keep my lighting low and warm. I avoid overhead and florescent lighting at all costs. When I was in a college dorm, I relied heavily on lamps and battery powered candles for this. In more recent years Iāve used a lot of discounted white Christmas lights. Full sun can be a powerful lighting too when the occasion calls for it and I seek it out for certain situations.
Smells are really important to me. I use them to help get me in the right headspace but they can also be offered to any spirits or deities you might be working with. In Kemetic practices, incense is a common offering. Candles can be a two for one deal. I try when possible to reserve certain smells for certain rituals but thatās hard to do when youāre working with a limited selection of scents. Iāve also used perfumes or anointed myself with a safe essential oil where I couldnāt burn or diffuse a scent.
Sound and music is tricky but I like to include it where I can for a few reasons. When I lived in a dorm and in housing shared with folks who werenāt my partner, turning up the right music ā usually in headphones ā helped block out distractions. When I reserve a certain playlist for ritual, it also helps put me in the right headspace and prepare me mentally for what Iām about to do.
Designing the Ritual
I usually start by selecting a point of focus. For working with a deity, that might be a drawing or a statue of them. For self-work, it might be a mirror. Whatever it is, I build the rest of the altar around that focal point. My why guides how I fill out the rest of the altar. Itās extra important to me that the altar add to the ambiance. Itās what Iāll spend my time looking at. Even if itās simple and small, it magnifies what Iām working on and keeps me focused on the tasks at hand.
My rituals are built on two types of action ā repeated and symbolic.
Repeated actions are ones I use to delineate to myself and whatever spirits Iām working with āhey this is the ritual nowā. I use a practice I call āsinging the circleā to open with. I will state the intended purpose of the ritual out loud or in the form of a prayer. While less common for me now, I will sometimes clap around the area to cleanse it before I start working. Iāve also occasionally included a hymn or poem at this point. I make offerings in almost every ritual I do so I would consider it repeated action as well. I also have repeated actions to close the ritual as well. One incentive for doing more rituals is to figure out what repeated action helps you the most through experimentation.
Symbolic actions derive from my why and are specific to each ritual. Burning a letter to myself, eating pomegranate seeds, dancing ecstatically ā these are all examples of symbolic action. The key here is that the symbol is resonant to you, that it makes sense to you. I couldnāt fill up my backyard with candles for Nitās festival but I could light a bunch in my spare room and imagine what her city must have looked like during itās heyday. I assisted with a ceremony for processing trauma in which the person threw a letter to an abuser in a ritual fire. Whatever the action is, make sure it feels right for you and your why.
Silence is an important part of my rituals. All of mine feature silence to some degree. Iāve done entire rituals not speaking a word. Usually though, I like to close out with a moment of silence to just be present with the energy the ritual has created.
Closing Out
Closing a ritual is usually simple for me. Itās blowing out a candle. Itās thanking the spirits, leaving the room, and then coming back to clean it up.
As part of recovering from the ritual and closing it out, Iāll usually eat something.
Nothing fancy here, but having at least something here helps me get back to the mundane.
TL;DR Checklist
-Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Why are you putting this ritual together?
-Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā How will you cleanse beforehand?
-Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā What lighting will be most appropriate?
-Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā What smells will be most appropriate?
-Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā What music will be most appropriate?
-Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā What will your point of focus be?
-Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā What else will go on your altar?
-Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā How will you open the ritual?
-Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā What will you main actions be?
-Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā What symbols will you include?
-Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā How will you include silence in your ritual?
-Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā How will you close out this ritual?
I hope this is helpful. I was hoping to get this up sooner but Iāve been sick all day. I hope folks are having a wonderful validation day!Ā
