#valeire

Dressed in the softest of silk sleeping gowns, her hair braided down her back with ribbons to keep it tidy. Queen Claudia was the picturesque image of an expectant mother. The small swell of her belly was a telling sign that the life within her was growing strong. Soft cooing noises escaped her as she ran her fingers over her silk covered tummy. For a moment she pictured her soft fingers had been exchanged for the rough hands of her lover, his gentle kiss as he whispered sweet nothings to their unborn child. Those private fantasies were kept deep within her heart as she tried not to dwell on the fact that her lover was off fighting a war her husband started.

"I know," Came a voice from near her bedchamber door. She recognized his voice and didn't bother to rise up, considering his words were biting. "That child can't be mine, I haven't actually fucked you for a while now," His voice turned bitter near the end, sending an unwanted chill up Claudia's spine. "Who's bastard is it? Did you spread your legs for some lowly servant?" His voice rose in volume as his rage built.

"I never once complained about you welcoming every girl into your bed," She replied still refusing to turn to face him. Her husband let out a noise that almost sounded like a snarling before throwing something against the wall and hearing it shatter. "What I do in my bed is none of your concern! I can fuck who I want! I am King!" He shouted rushing toward her to stand before her, face red in anger.

"And I am Queen!" She replied, looking up to meet his gaze.

"No, you are a Princess of some tiny country sent here to give me heirs. I can strip you of everything you ever had. I can banish you or even have you killed," He roared but she didn't flinch, not even when he crowed into her space as she sat. Claudia kept her gaze on him, her eyes dark and just a glance shy of being a glare. "Who is he?"

"I'll never tell,"

"So be it. I'll ensure you never leave this room. Once the war is done I will find a way to rid myself of you," William stated and watched the fear flicker in Claudia's beautiful eyes, a dark smile crossing his lips. There was a painful silence that broke between them before William departed from her room. A deafening slam of her chamber door echoed as shouts were heard from outside. She couldn't bother to move instead she sat there with her hand over her belly as a way to protect her child.

~~~

           Days turned into weeks and William kept his word. Claudia was never allowed to her leave her chambers. A few maids were sent in to tend to her basic needs, but she remained a well-cared for prisoner. All her ladies-in-waiting had been dismissed, William lied and said it was an old religious tradition. However, if anyone knew Claudia from her other two pregnancies they knew it to be a lie. In the past she often spent time out and with court well into her final month of pregnancy.

Claudia attempted a few times to write letters to get the word out of her mistreatment, but they were always intercepted by William's guards. The letters were often turned to her in the form of small piles of ash. She did try to persuade a few maids to sneak notes out but often times the girls were too afraid, William had a strong hold over those in his castle. The civil war had made him paranoid and prone to violent outbursts. The maids were thinking of themselves or their families first, which Claudia had to respect.

~~~

Well into her eighth month of pregnancy with the rounded of her belly well pronounced, Claudia wondered what she could do. Rasmus was busy fighting and no way she could get a letter to him. If she did manage to sneak it out, someone could read it before him and alert the King of the truth of their relationship.

"Your majesty, one of the lady cooks have made you a special meal for the health of the baby," A young maid announced, curtsying before Claudia as she presented the dish. Claudia offered her a slightly distracted smile as she turned to look at her meal. It looked divine but she found little desire to eat.

"I am not hungry, but you may eat it,"

"Oh I couldn't, but I'll be sure to keep it warm for you in case you are hungry later," The maid said before moving the tray closer to the small fire the kept the winter's chill out of her chambers.

"Ruth, can you tell me any new of the war. Is it near an end?" Claudia asked, phrasing her question carefully to hopefully gain some details about Rasmus.

"Hard to say your majesty, we've had a terrible loss. Half our fleet went north, his Lord Commander Sir Rasmus and nearly half our troops were lost at sea. We wait now to hear from him or perhaps we admit defeat," The girl went on to talk more, providing Claudia with the news she assumed she wanted but Claudia was deaf to all noise. Upon hearing the phrase <I>'lost at sea'</i>

Ruth's words were on a loop, damned to repeat over and over in her head as she began to shake. Rasmus was gone, he had been forced in to a watery grave. She knew very little of the navy but she did know quite a bit about the water so far north. Storms crashed against hard rocks during every season. No one dared to navigate those seas. Her lover must be truly desperate to end the war to risk such a dangerous tactic.

"You are sure... that Sir Rasmus is gone," Claudia managed to stutter out which caught the maid off guard. The young woman had gone on to talk about the low food supply on the account of all of it going to the troops. It took her a moment to realize what the Queen had said.

"Yes, His Majesty announced it today, promoted Lord Erwin Duke of Millford in his place to lead the armies," Ruth told her sensing the sadness in Claudia.  "Is something wrong? Is the baby okay?" Ruth asked, confusion present in her soft voice. Claudia shook her head before pushing herself out of her chair, a slight wobble as she found her center of gravity. Ruth was by her side instantly but Claudia gently pushed her away. She made her away slowly to a desk and pull toward her a small piece of parchment to write a note.

She was quick, her handwriting elegant and efficient. Ruth hovered near her, still unsure of what was going on but still very keen on helping her Queen.

"Ruth, I need you to deliver this to Sir Henry Landon, it is very important it gets to him without anyone noticing. I know it is a big risk for you but if you manage to do this for me I will ensure your family is safe," Claudia looked at the young woman with eyes full of determination despite her condition. Ruth was silent but nodded accepting the letter and turning toward the tray she had carried in. She opened it up and placed the letter on top of the meal before covering it back up. Claudia nodded her approval before watching as the woman made her way out of her chambers.

~

The full moon filled the bed chamber, but Claudia hadn't noticed. She was sitting warm by the fire, a fur-lined cloak thrown over her shoulders. Despite her swollen feet from her pregnancy, she managed to slide her feet into a pair of boots. She looked prepared to leave despite her husband's confinement.

Three knocks tapped at her door and Ruth was quick to rise, Claudia nodded for the woman to open the door. In strode Sir Henry Landon, a man of age and wisdom. He bowed before his queen. He too was dressed for travel.

"I have my own guards at your door tonight. His Majesty is already in his chambers across the castle. My guards would sooner die then betray my trust. We can sneak you through the kitchen. I have hired a carriage to take you wherever you wish to go. But you must walk a short distance to meet him. I couldn't risk him alerting the guards by coming closer," Henry explained. Claudia nodded as a sign of approval.

"I can't thank you enough Henry, I owe you so much," She added emotion rising in her throat. He put aside all formalities and pulled the woman into an embrace. Years as an ambassador to her home country had awarded him status of a beloved uncle.

"May I ask one thing? Why now? You could have asked sooner"

"I thought the war would have been over by now and my child's father returned to me, but he is lost. My child is restless and I am sure he or she will be born before the end of Winter. I will not risk their new life because once they are born the truth of their father will become clear," Claudia told him, carefully choosing her words to remain cryptic. She didn't want either of them to know that Rasmus was the father. It was her secret alone.

"I understand. Where will you go?"

"I believe Valeire will give me shelter," She told him adding no more information.

"Exchange cloaks with Ruth," Henry told her which earned a sort of shocked expression from Claudia. "Everyone knows that cloak, you wear it all the time. We can't risk you being spotted beforehand. Ruth's cloak is much more ragged and you will go unnoticed," Henry explained as he helped her to exchange them. Ruth had remained mostly silent between the exchange but accepting the cloak. Ruth didn't bother to put it on instead she placed it inside a lockable trunk for when Claudia returned.

"Henry, please write to Sophia and Robbie when you can, explain to them I am not running away from them but their father. I will likely have to go into hiding, but I will do my best to keep you updated. Ensure my children are safe, I don't think William has it in him to hurt our children, but I don't trust him, not anymore." Claudia said her voice again edging closer to breaking. Henry nodded patting her shoulder softly.

"Gather whatever you wish to take with you but we have to hurry," Henry told her as he glanced out the window. There wasn't much time left judging by the moon's position. Claudia nodded and without a word she quickly gathered her things. She was bringing with her only a small writing box, filled to the brim with writing material and unsent letter. Around her neck she wore a necklace that was given to her by Rasmus and made the bold choice of leaving behind William's gifted wedding ring. The ring was one last jab at him. She nodded toward Henry who took her hand gently and lead her out the door. Ruth didn't follow she was to wait one hour before departing back to her own bed. Henry took the lead but Claudia set the pace. Her large belly made moving slow, but they went mostly unnoticed, Henry's guards were loyal and didn’t utter a sound as they walked past them.

Down the corridor and through the silent kitchen, Claudia had to pause for a moment to catch her breath, her heart hammering away in her chest. Henry waited before urging her on to walk carefully out of the castle courtyard and toward a doorway in the gate. She adjusted the hood of her cloak and kept her head down, Henry did the same.

"Halt!" A guard called, forcing them both to freeze. However, it seems that Henry was prepared for this.

"I am taking my daughter home to have her child in her mother's care, we wanted to leave before dawn to avoid any bandits on the road," He told the guard, doing his best to rid his voice of its natural authoritative tone. The guard nodded before stepping aside and letting them past.

Claudia let out a sigh of relief as they were on the main road. She was able to raise her head up and see the carriage. Two black horses tossed their heads slightly as their driver hushed them. "Your majesty, this is where I leave you. Travel safe and write as soon as you can," Henry told her upon their arrival at the carriage. She thanked him with another hug before stepping up with help into the carriage and sitting. The driver offered Henry a parting wave before urge the horses into a walk then an easy trot. Claudia peeked through the window behind her until Henry was nothing more than a dot. Under the sounds of the carriage moving onward, Claudia was able to finally let the stress of the past few hours out in sobs.

Large tears fell down her face as she came to terms with quite possibly never seeing her children again. Fear entrapped her, would William hurt them to spite her? Sophia was by far the most charming of princesses. She had a certain quality about her, one that would make her a beloved Queen. Robbie although young was also clever and smart, a natural caretaker. Claudia thought fondly of her children, pictured Sophia sitting beside her and Robbie doing his best to calm her tears. She missed them dearly, perhaps more then she missed Rasmus. The longing returned as she also realized the truth that Rasmus was gone from her as well. He would never see the child that grew inside her, never teach them to walk or even watch them grow. Through the tears and soft sobbing Claudia felt the child kick and move within her, perhaps reminding her that she wasn't alone. That even if she was running away from one life she would have some part of Rasmus with her always. Claudia did her best to sooth the child by drawing patterns over her belly, holding back the sobs that threatened to bring her to the floor of the carriage.

The trip in the carriage was slow and provided her little comfort the way it moved. Not that it even mattered, she couldn't sleep. Instead she watched the sunrise and tried to smile at the sight of large corn fields that showed they had made it to the Duchy. However, Claudia found no comfort until the sound of cobblestone hitting the wheels of the carriage. They were finally at Darfield Keep, home of her only true friend.

Unsure if the Henry warned anyone beforehand, Claudia held her breath as the carriage pulled right up to the entrance of the Keep. She waited only a moment as the driver stepped down and opened the door. She was pleasantly surprised to see Valerie standing on the steps to the Keep.

"Dearest Valerie," Claudia called out to her, alerting her oldest friend of her location. Valerie made her way over to her, Claudia wanted to cry again but found the tears impossible. "I need your help,"

"Sir Henry Landon sent a brief note already. You need something to eat and to rest, I had the servants prepare a room for you. You will go there first to change into something more comfortable. You've been through enough," Valerie told her without letting Claudia interject but she didn't mind. Instead she listened to her friend and followed whoever was leading her into a room befitting her status as Queen.

In all truth Claudia didn't care for all the glamour, she simply wanted to sleep in a bed and hold back the sadness. A young maid brought her a meal but she ate very little of it and asked to be left alone to sleep. She slept for only a few short hours before being forced awake, a sharp pain in her back. There wasn't much time for panic considered she had been a mother twice; she knew the pains of labor. Calling out for help, Claudia was impressed to find midwives and Valeire rushing to her aid. Valerie came to sit beside her, offering a hand for Claudia to cling to as each contraction forced her to cry out. It was safe to assume that stressed had forced the baby to come early. Claudia was scared at first but also eager which made for a very unique state of emotion for her.

Claudia labored for nearly ten hours until finally the screams of a new baby filled her room. Despite getting little sleep and travelling, Claudia reached out for her baby with renewed vigor. She held the small screaming infant to her chest, offering soft cooing sounds as she kissed the baby's soft skin. Tears rolled down her cheek as the baby slowly quieted down when finally, in her mother's arms. Valeire offered Claudia a gentle touch to her forehead as the midwives continued to tend to her.

"She is perfect and beautiful," Spoke finally, counting her new daughter's fingers and toes and kissing each of them.

"Did you pick out a name already?" Valeire asked, Claudia nodded. She had chosen a few names for boys but only one name for a girl. It had been chosen carefully because of the fond memory it invoked within her. The memory of the first time Rasmus said he loved her.

"Rosalynn Griswulf," Claudia spoke softly, alerting her friend to the true nature of the newborn’s parents and explaining her sudden need to escape her husband.

"I'm sure she will be strong just like her father," Valerie told her rising up from the bed and offering the new mother a little more space with her child. Claudia nodded too overcome with emotion to use her words. Instead she held her daughter close to her and simply stared. Memorizing each feature of her daughter. She even took charge in cleaning her Rosalynn with warm water. It wasn't that she didn't trust the midwives but that she simply wanted to keep Rosalynn as close to her as possible. The newborn was all that she had left of Rasmus and no harm would ever come to her little rose.