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Welcome to Black Mesa Research Facility. Please input username and password.
USERNAME
KaneAndLynch2
PASSWORD
***************
INCORRECT PASSWORD
USERNAME
KaneAndLynch2
PASSWORD
*************
Welcome, Gordon Freeman !
GORDON FREEMAN is now available for asks!
JOSHUA is now available for asks!
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Ah! Perfect timing Dr. Coomer! Bubby uh... kinda passed out
“Ah! Wait, what-?”
“....Oh. Oh dear, that- that’s not good. Hang in there Bubby!!”
“Uhhh, Mr Coomer? I think that’s your name? That’s bulletproof glass, I don’t think-”
“No worries, Gordon! This glass is no match for my Black Mesa Cybernetic Arms!”
Soooo what now? -🔮
“Well...um.”
“...I guess I just. Wait till one of the scientists gets back?? I don’t think I have the security clearance to get into that observation room..”
[A knock on the door nearest to Gordon]
“Oh! Speak of the devil-”
“Ah, hello intern!” “...Who the heck are you?”
YO BUBBYYYYYYYY!! YOU BURNIN SHIT???!! FUCKIN EPIC!!!! -💫
“Did your phone just...speak?”
“..Yea. It does that.”
[Maniacal cackling, followed by a screamed ‘HELL YEAH’ , following by an audible increase in Flames]
Sooooo next to an intern your also an unpayed maid to Xir Wick, Gordon? -🔮
“...Great. I’ll just. Add this to my list of jobs. Alongside ‘‘‘intern’‘‘ at Black Mesa, and night cashier at IHOP. Cool. How the hell did all this trash get here?? I checked the meal list for this cell, we haven’t even...given you ‘DRS’ chips? Or ‘Nox’ soda?”
“Wait Nox and DRS aren’t even real brands what the h-”
yoooo brooooo...you work at...international house of...pogchamp
“Do you even know what ‘pogchamp’ means??”
huh. what.
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There's nothing there? But there's things all around you!.. or is what we perceive just a concept we've created in our minds? How do you know you're not dreaming? H̸o̴w̵ ̷d̷o̶ ̴y̷o̶u̶ ̷k̸n̴o̸w̸ ̶t̸h̸i̵s̷ ̸i̷s̷ ̷r̶e̷a̶l̶,̶ ̴H̵a̶r̵o̶l̴d̷?̴
“ I . I . . . ”
“ I can ‘ t - I don ‘ t - ”
“YEA, I KNOW.”
Why do you have some kind of rogue robot assistant on your work computer? Doesn't seem very 'for non-personal use', Gordon.
>MY NAME’S JOSHIE! IM A BOY WHO LIVES IN THE COMPUTER! I LIKE COWBOY GAMES!
Yeaahhh, he’s supposed to be some kind of desktop assistant but he’s a little uh... busted..
so, what do you do here, Freeman? - ∞
I - okay, so this. This has gotta be some sort of internal test, right? Intern’s almost at the end of his first week on the job, send a bunch of cryptic emails, make sure they know exactly what the hell they’ve signed up for. Okay.
So, what do I do here? Not much right now. Delivered a couple dozen coffees to some grouchy lab nerds, brought the less dangerous subjects some food. The usual intern stuff, I guess.
