For projectptv:
About a month before all this happened, I had discovered Pierce The Veil through the Warped Tour Compilation CD. At first I would just play it through and rock out when Caraphernelia came on, not really knowing who it was. When I actually looked to see who it was by, I decided to look them up on youtube. I began listening to the whole album through videos while reading lyrics in another tab. The Boy Who Could Fly instantly became my favorite song. I knew that when I went to KY, I would have no way to listen to them. So, I made my mom buy the CD off ebay and have it mailed to me at my grandparent's. When it got there, I was so excited. It was in the radio all the time and when it reached the end, I would hit repeat. In my depression it was all I could do to get out of bed and go to the bathroom. It took so much effort to drag myself to the dinner table, and when I was done, I would go back into my room and sleep. I slept all the time. Selfish Machines was always on. One day when I was laying there start up at the ceiling, I actually really listened to The New National Anthem. I listened to it over and over again. It made me feel like my feelings were natural and that it was okay. It gave me the courage to write her a letter telling her all my feelings about us and her and how I wanted to stay friends. After writing it, I felt so much better. At least they were out. I never intended for her to see it. Well, to skip the unimportant stuff...I ended up telling her. About a week later she asked me out. I was so happy. I got her into PTV and made her a copy and we listened to it all the time when we were together. Chemical Kids and Mechanical Brides always reminds me of those first few months. We went to Warped 2012 together and got to see them and I just cried and sang as loud as I possibly could while holding her hand. They just mean so much to me because I honestly feel like we would have never been together if they hadn't gave me the courage to say anything. Me and her broke up after 2 years and 2 months. I was sad then, and it's still sad to think about. But we're still friends, which is awesome. I was afraid that I would never be able to listen to PTV again...but then I thought to think about the good and not the bad. Also, it wasn't their fault that it ended. They're basically the reason I will carry those good memories with me. They are responsible for what will probably be 2 of the best years of my life. I went through another depression between October 17th and November 7th. I don't remember what caused it, possibly school/home drama combined with the breakup. But I kept holding on...I was going to meet them in November. My mom drove my friend and I 6 hours away, from Indiana to Ohio, so that I could see them. I had to jump out of the car at a red light and walk down the street in the freezing cold, with no jacket on, only to find out I was going the wrong way and had to turn around. I stood in line for the Meet&Greet for hours it seemed like. Finally, I could see them through the window. I was one of the last people in line. You got to go in with the group of people you were with, well I was by myself. When I walked in, I went to talk to Jaime and was thrilled to show him my dinosaur hat. I felt bad because I didn't really say anything to Tony and Mike, but that was because Vic got my attention. He shook my hand and asked my name and then when I left, he called me "Ry". I felt so special. It was the simplest thing, but it made me feel like he was just a good friend I had seen a million times before. I was mad that I had forgotten my camera in the car, and it was a miracle my phone stayed on long enough to snap one very dark photo of us. I came outside and I was crying. Just being there with them and how they treated me, I felt so much better knowing that they cared. I was a bit upset I didn't get to tell them, but ohwell. They mean so much to me because I feel like they love me unconditionally, just for the simple fact that I love them and support them. They are sometimes the only thing that keeps me from self-harming, I know they would want me to stay strong. I love Pierce The Veil. -Ryan Marie Stout
