#ultimate cyborg

[Black screen.]

???: […alone. I’m all alone. I’ve always felt alone…]

???: [Wait, how can I always be alone if I can’t even remember what my name is? Or how I got here? Or why I feel so…out of it.]

Haruki: [Okay. Baby steps. I am Haruki Douzono. I got accepted into Hope’s Peak a week or two ago as the Ultimate Cyborg. And I don’t know where I am.]

Haruki: [I move my body, my arm, my legs, and open my eyes. Above me is a girl with a long, blue ponytail. Her eyes light up when she sees my eyes open.]

???: Hey, hey you’re awake! Everyone!

He’s finally woken up!

Haruki: What’s…what’s going on? Where are we..?

???: We all…we aren’t sure ourselves. We all just woke up here. Anyway, are you okay? Can you stand?

Haruki: [I gently sat up, and looked around. There were more people here, and they all looked confused or quite bored. I got to my feet.]

???: It took you long enough, like, I thought you were dead.

???: Hey now, he had a pulse for a while. I was thinking you suffered a concussion, Hun.

???: You’re okay now, that’s all that matters.

???: Enough glad here, and thankful that, does anyone happen to know how we ended up in this little predicament?

???: Ooooh, maybe we were kidnapped! I always wanted to see what that felt like, hehehehe!

Haruki: Kidnapped? We couldn’t have been kidnapped…I mean, I don’t think this is what kidnapping looks like.

Haruki: [That girl can’t be serious…I mean, it makes a lot of sense, but at least I was warned before being taken away.]

???: Ohhhh, this’ll be a HIT with my followers! Everyone, sayyyy kidnapped!

Haruki: [The person held up their phone, and pointed the camera at the rest of the group. For some reason, my natural instinct is to smile at it. What am I doing?]

???: You have a phone?! Call for help! Call someone!

???: Alright, alright, quit nagging me-

Haruki: [The girl pouted as the person frantically typed on their phone. We all watched in anticipation, but after a while, the person turned off their phone and sighed.]

???: No dice, no signal, no escape. Wahhhh, this sucks, I can’t post-

???: You can get your unhealthy ego boost from the internet later. We need to figure out where we are. Perhaps explore. And check your bodies. There might be signs of distress.

???: Do you m-mean…drugged and dragged?! The image of someone scraping me across the floor as I’m all drugged up…ick!

???: No, we all look fine…and if they would’ve been rough with us, they would’ve tied us up too. It would be gigoehan!

Haruki: [As everyone argued, the blue-ponytailed girl tapped my shoulder.]

???: Hey, I’m just checking on ya. You were out for a while, y’know?

Haruki: Thank you, but I’m pretty sure I’ll be fine. I’m built different.

???: Hehe, cool. I like your jacket! It’s very comfy looking.

Haruki: It is, I sleep in it.

???: Soooo, you must bee getting a great night’s sleep!

…

Haruki: [Was there a joke I wasn’t getting? She just keeps staring at me.]

???: …

Haruki: …

???: Oh shoot, I haven’t introduced myself yet…the joke would’ve been- nevermind!

Kiki: I’m the Ultimate Beekeeper, Kiki Gunji! We’re going to…beecome such great friends!

Haruki: [Okay, now I get the joke.]

Haruki: Hehehe, I like your puns.

Kiki: Thanks, my Grandma always told me that, even in the darkest of situations, it’ll probably make a funny story one day.

Haruki: True…hopefully this maybe kidnapping will be hysterical.

Kiki: Hmhmhm, soooo, what’s your name? Are you an ultimate too?

Haruki: Yeah, I’m Haruki Douzono. I’m the Ultimate…

Haruki: [I trailed off. I didn’t wanna tell her I was a cyborg…it’s not even a real ultimate. And she might see me as a freak…]

Kiki: You forgot the Ultimate part of your introduction. I can guess! Hm, Hiker, Biker, Spiker-

Haruki: Cyborg. I’m the Ultimate Cyborg.

Kiki: A CYBORG?!

Haruki: [She said loud enough to where a few people looked at us.]

Haruki: Hey, not so loud, please! I don’t want people to know that’s my ultimate.

Kiki: Why not? It’s so cool!

Haruki: Most people don’t think so…and I tend to get seen as less than human.

Haruki: [As soon as I finished that sentence, her eyes seemed to burn with rage.]

Kiki: Less than human?! Are you kidding me?!? That’s pathetic! Being a cyborg is such a feat technologically! They need to shut the fuck up!!

Kiki: Heyo, if anyone is being mean to you because of your cyborg-ness, then send them to me! I’ll give them a beat down!

Haruki: Eh?! No, don’t beat anyone up, please don’t! Thank you for uh, caring that much though.

Kiki: It’s nothing! Don’t thank me!! People being ignorant just really, really pisses me off.

Haruki: Speaking of people, do you think anyone has come up with a plan?

Kiki: Dunno, but-

CRACK!

Haruki: [A sudden crack tore through the air. We all looked to see where it came from, and I was shocked to see a girl with long purple hair holding a riding crop. She cracked it again, then handed it to a tall, platinum blonde man.]

???: Thank you for that.

???: It’s my pleasure, dear.

[The girl handed him the riding crop, and he stepped aside. She cleared her throat.]

???: Everyone, I have devised the absolute best plan for this situation.

[A green haired girl raises her hand.]

???: Yes, Miss?

???: Whyyyy are you the leader? Just because you have a clipboard?

???: I have pockets full of human teeth, so you all should be on your knees.

Haruki: [Sorry, she has what?!]

???: That’s why.

???: I’m TALKING here? Okay, I have reached a conclusion! We all should investigate safely and get acquainted with each other!

???: There is a very real possibility that we could be trapped here for a long time, so we need to gather as much information as we possibly can!

???: Furthermore, making friends and socializing with each other is to help us not feel isolated and alone in a situation like this!

???: Any questions?

Haruki: [A boy with sunglasses raised his hand. The girl at the front pointed to him.]

???: Yes?

???: Chick, you said something like…investigating safely? What didja’ mean by that? Also, loving the dress.

???: One, thank you, I look great in everything! Two, I have taken the time to look at the ground, and I have noticed that there are traps.

???: Traps..? May you elaborate?

???: Perhaps, if you all let me finish my SENTENCE! Huff, on the ground, under the fake grass, there are outlines of trapped doors.

???: Oh! Oh oh, may I test something! It’ll be the most fun! Someone, give me something, anything!

???: Will a pen suffice?

???: Yes, yes! Perfect!

Haruki: [He snatched the pen out of the girl’s hand and smirked.]

???: And a one, and a two-

Haruki: [He tossed the pen on top of the trapped door. We all watched, nothing happened. The girl went to retrieve her pen, but-]

Haruki: WATCH OUT!

Haruki: [She froze in front of the trap door, and we all watched as the flaps opened, and the pen dropped into a pit of fire. The girl, with a face completely void of emotion, turned around.]

???: A pity. I liked that pen.

???: Sooo…search safely.

Haruki: [We all nodded in agreement, and everyone began to search, very very very cautiously.]

Haruki: [I turned to Kiki, who looked a bit worried.]

Haruki: I kinda don’t wanna move anymore.

Kiki: Yeah…that’s fair.

…

Kiki: Wanna search together?

Haruki: Definitely.

Kiki: Make sure to catch me if I fall into a fire pit!

Haruki: Me and my cybernetic abilities will try to save you.

Kiki: Abilities? Are you super strong or do you have heat vision??

Haruki: I’m a cyborg, not a robot, I’m still human.

Kiki: Oh, sorry-

Haruki: It’s nothing. My powers are…well, I’m not too sure. I know I can shoot energy beams from my hand, but that’s all.

Haruki: The doctors didn’t expect me to live long enough to use them, anyway…

Kiki: What was that?

Haruki: Nothing, let’s start investigating.

Kiki: We also need to introduce ourselves! And we can do that together! Remember, if anyone is being a jerk, I’ll tear them to pieces!! Ha!

Haruki: Thanks, but- eh. Let’s just go.

Haruki: [Kiki and I walked over to the purple haired girl, the one shouting orders at everyone.]

Haruki: Hi, my friend and I were wondering where to start searching?

???: Oh, let’s see…

Haruki: [The girl surveyed the room, and pointed over to a corner.]

???: Right over there, begin searching the walls, then search the floors. But not before checking for more traps of course.

Haruki: Tha-

Kiki: Heyyyy, before we do that, you said we should try to get closer to each other, right?

???: Yes, bonding with each other is crucial!

Kiki: So, we should introduce ourselves! I’m Kiki Gunji, the Ultimate Beekeeper, and this is Haruki Douzono, the Ultimate-

Haruki: Completely normal human being.

???: …I’ve checked and researched Hope’s Peak, and I’ve never, in all my hours, heard Average Joe as an ultimate.

???: So, I can conclude that you are lying to me.

Haruki: [The girl stared at me, with very intense eyes. What was she, a cop?]

Haruki: …okay, I’m the Ultimate Cyborg.

???: Thank you.

Kiki: Moving on, what’s your name?

Benio: Okay, introductions. I am Benio Gima, the Ultimate Party Planner. When talking to me, make sure to keep the conversation moving.

Kiki: Ohhh! A party planner! So that’s why you’re really good at being in charge!

Benio: Naturally. Order and calm is the most important part of terrible situations.

Haruki: You really do think this situation is horrible? We’re Hope’s Peak students, it can’t be that bad.

Benio: You foolish man, it’s because we’re Hope’s Peak students that makes this situation awful!

Kiki: Hey, he isn’t foolish! Maybe this is like…a party for the students! And we’re here early!

Benio: Girl, please! I am a PARTY PLANNER! This is absolutely, positively, totally not like any party I’ve been to!

Haruki: Alrighty, relax, relax. Benio, what can you tell us about this situation?

Haruki: [She seemed to light up, and she pulled out her clipboard.]

Benio: I am SO glad you asked! Point 1 of 56…

Haruki: [Kiki and I looked at each other. She started her list.]

Haruki: [We tried to interject, but she just scoffed everytime we said anything, and kept going.]

Haruki: [And going.]

Haruki: [And going.]

…

Benio: And point 56 out of 56, there is absolutely no way that-

Kiki: BENIO!

Benio: What?! This is your 6th interjection! It better be at least sort of important this time!

Kiki: Weren’t we supposed to be searching 20 minutes ago?! What the fuck did this achieve?!

Benio: You are being a foolish, ignorant-

Haruki: We’re going to go search now. Thanks, Benio. Come on, Kiki.

Haruki: [I had to practically pull Kiki away from Benio, as she kept ranting about how this was wasting her time. Benio just sarcastically smirked.]

Haruki: [I didn’t tell Kiki that her ranting was also wasting our time.]

Haruki: [Kiki and I walked over to a girl in a green crop top.]

Haruki: [The girl is stretching as she inspects the floor.]

Kiki: Hey! I like your top!

???: Oh, thanks. Your scrunchie is pretty cute too.

Kiki: Awww, thank you!

Haruki: Uhm, Hi. I’m Haruki Douzono, Ultimate Cyborg…

Haruki: [I sighed. If one person knows, everyone else will eventually.]

Haruki: And this is Kiki Gunji, Ultimate Beekeeper.

Kiki: Hey! I’m happy to bee here!

???: Cute, cute. Cyborg sounds pretty awesome, but so does beekeeper. I respect both of you. Congrats on getting in here.

Kiki: Thanks! Who might you be?

Claire: Oh, me? Claire Katz, Ultimate Cheer Captain. I’m pretty chill, I’m nothing to be afraid of.

Kiki: A Cheer Captain?! Neat! Can you show me something??

Haruki: Hey, don't put her on the spot like this-

Claire: Nah, it’s cool. Ahem…1, 2, 3!

Haruki: [She proceeded to do a toe touch, and then a move so impressive I don’t even know what it’s called.]

Haruki: [Then, she casually walks back over to Kiki and I. We both applaud.]

Kiki: TEACH ME!! PLEASE, TEACH ME!!

Claire: Hehehe, if you really want to, I could. I’m wayyy better at teaching than I am at doing.

Kiki: Great!! Totally groovy!! When can you teach me?? I’m free anytime!

Haruki: Kiki, maybe you can learn tumbling and cheering after we figure out what’s going on?

Claire: I’m with him. Sorry, Kiki.

Kiki: No, no, I get carried away, haha…

Haruki: Anyway, Claire, have you gathered any more information on our situation? Or at least, this room?

Claire: Hm…I’ve gathered that this grass is totally fake, but that’s obvious.

Claire: Oh, oh oh oh, I also found another trap. Watch this.

Haruki: [Claire pushes us both back, and taps her foot on another patch of grass. Large, metal spikes shoot out of the ground, and then, as fast as they appeared, they retract into the ground.]

Claire: This is like a horror movie. Even worse than the one with the weird puppet thingy.

Kiki: They want us dead! They just want to watch us die!!

Haruki: Who wants to watch us?

Kiki: I don’t know, the puppet thing!!

Claire: I really can’t think of any explanation for any of this…other than this all being a dream.

Haruki: [I pinch myself.]

Haruki: [Ow! No, I’m not dreaming, just making sure.]

Kiki: Thanks for the info, Claire! And when this all is sorted out, we should get a coffee!!

Claire: Or practice cheer in a non-lethal courtyard.

Kiki: Hehehe!! I look forward to it!!

Claire: Gooooo Hope’s Peak!

Haruki: [She strikes a pose, and smiles.]

Haruki: [She’s nice.]

Haruki: [Kiki and I walked over to the person wearing a large sweater.]

Haruki: Hello, it’s a pleasure to meet you. I'm Haruki Douzono, Ultimate Cyborg, and this is Kiki Gunji, Ultimate Beekeeper.

Haruki: [I gesture to Kiki, who smiles and waves. The person just scoffs.]

???: Hi, I guess. What do you want?

Kiki: We’re introducing ourselves like Benio told us to? And investigating!!

???: This is so boringgg. Not as boring as your ultimate, though.

Kiki: Huh?! Beekeeping is REALLY cool and VERY interesting!! Keep this up and I’ll beeeat your ass!!

Haruki: [Only a few sentences in and Kiki is already threatening to beat up someone.]

Haruki: […okay, I’ll play peacemaker.]

Haruki: Hey, hey, uhm, what’s your name and ultimate?

???: Why should I tell either of you? Like, you’ll try to beat me up again.

Haruki: We promise we won’t threaten you again. Right, Kiki?

Kiki: …right…

Yukina: Hmph. I guess I can tell you now. I’m Yukina Jinno, Ultimate Cellist. I’m like…the pride of my orchestra. That goes without saying, though.

Haruki: Woah, a musician! Awesome! I did band in high school.

Yukina: Band and orchestra are not the same thing, duh.

Kiki: Quit being so rude! He just said he played an instrument!

Yukina: Yeah, but band and orchestra just aren’t the same thing at all!

Yukina: Band focuses on more wind and percussion instruments, and orchestra is string instruments.

Yukina: Orchestra is a lot more “refined” than band is, too.

Haruki: [They’re…are they making me feel bad for being a band kid?]

Haruki: Band can be refined too.

Yukina: How?

…

Haruki: [I didn’t think that far ahead.]

Kiki: Leave him alone, band is just as cool and fancy as orchestra is! It all depends on the piece!

Yukina: Question, what’s your favorite instrument?

Kiki: The accordion!

Haruki: The triangle.

Yukina: Okay, your opinions aren’t valid anyway.

Haruki: [They rolled their eyes.]

Yukina: Accordion? Triangle? Are you kidding me?

Yukina: Whatever, just like- this conversation is over. Talk to me when your taste in instruments isn’t so…dumb.

Yukina: [They shrug, and walk off.]

Kiki: What the hell?! What’s wrong with the accordion?!? I learned polka!!

Haruki: I don’t think that would’ve changed anything.

Kiki: Hmph!!

Haruki: [Kiki crossed her arms. I don’t blame her.]

Haruki: [Kiki and I walked over to the guy wearing big, black glasses.]

Haruki: [He was reading…the Bible. A pocket Bible.]

Kiki: Hellooo!! Whatcha reading?

???: …hm…

Haruki: [I whispered to Kiki.]

Haruki: Hey, maybe we should come back later?

Kiki: No, we already walked up here!! Maybe I just need to be louder!!

Haruki: Not too-

Kiki: HEY!! WHAT ARE YOU READING?!

Haruki: [He jumped, dropping his pocket Bible.]

Haruki: [He sighed and looked at us.]

???: I was reading a passage in the Bible…keyword, was.

Kiki: Sorry, I just, didn’t know if you heard me-

Haruki: [She chuckled nervously. The guy just stared.]

Haruki: [His eyes then turned to me.]

Haruki: [He looks dazed. His eyes just look so foggy.]

Haruki: I’m Haruki Douzono, and this is Kiki Gunji.

Kiki: I’m a Beekeeper, and he’s a really awesome and high tech cyborg!

Haruki: [And I would’ve gotten away with it too, if it wasn’t for you meddling beekeeper.]

???: A cyborg..? How does that work? And how are you an ultimate?

Haruki: Government.

???: Ahhhh. Makes sense.

Kiki: Who might you be??

Zempei: Oh yes, me. I’m Zempei Nakamura, Ultimate Theologian. Please, be aware I’m not a stuck-up prude as some assume.

Kiki: That’s the study of Christianity, right?? Oh! My uncle is a preacher!! Have you heard of Pastor Yoshie?

Zempei: Hm…is he tall with a handmade cane?

Kiki: That’s the guy!!!

Zempei: Oh. His sermons were average, at best. He just stared at the congregation.

Zempei: He didn’t explain the passage. It was sad, really.

Kiki: What the hell, man?!

Zempei: What? Did I say something?

Haruki: Kiki, he doesn’t understand what he did wrong. Let it go.

Kiki: BUT-

Haruki: [I gently placed my hand on Kiki’s shoulder.]

Haruki: [She looked at me in silence.]

Haruki: [It felt like a while.]

Haruki: [Then, she took a deep breath.]

Kiki: Zempei, I’m sorry for cussing you out, sorry.

Zempei: Oh, it’s fine.

Kiki: Okay, so, redo, redo redo redo…

Kiki: What do you like about theology?

Zempei: The lore.

Haruki: Lore?

Zempei: Yes. The lore.

Haruki: Isn’t that…kind of a weird way to describe the Bible.

Kiki: Oh! Sounds like a video game!! It’s very…beewildering!

Haruki: [He paused for a moment, and stared into space.]

Zempei: Ohhhhhhhh. Bee. Beekeeper. Funny.

Kiki: I’m glad you got it!!

Zempei: Anyway, I call it lore since…

Zempei: …I’m not religious. I just adore the study of Christianity.

Kiki: Ohhh, okay!! That’s pretty cool!! What’s your favorite character?

Zempei: I like Adam and Eve, they basically started it all.

Haruki: [Is the Bible a video game?]

Haruki: Have you discovered anything yet?

Zempei: Let me see…ah! Direct your attention to the wall.

Haruki: [He touches a certain part of the wall, and-]

Haruki: BLACK WIDOWS! AHH!

Haruki: [Under our feet, what looked like hundreds of black widows came out from the place he touched the wall.]

Kiki: AHH! CAREFUL! THEY ACTUALLY WON’T KILL YOU BUT THEY’LL HURT!!

Zempei: Calm down, and watch.

Haruki: [He very calmly walks over to where the fire trap door is, and stands on it.]

Haruki: [All the black widows are following him, and as soon as he steps off the trap door, all of them fall into the fire pit.]

Kiki: Woah!! Are you sure you aren’t the Ultimate Animal Whisperer?! That was insane!!

Zempei: I’m not sure, I just walked and they followed. I feel like Jesus leading his Disciples.

Kiki: Yea- HOLD ON!!

Haruki: Wha- AH!

Haruki: [Before I could even think, Kiki slapped my face. She wiped her hand off on her skirt.]

Haruki: [She’s stronger than she looks- ow, ow ow ow!]

Kiki: I’m sorry! There was one on your face!! I didn’t want you to get bit!! And I promise I’d defend you!!!

Zempei: I suppose I’ll leave you all to it. A pleasure meeting you.

Zempei: and a TERRIBLE pain! JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP, BEEZWAX!!!

Zempei: Cough…hm. I wonder what I was saying…oh well. See you.

Haruki: [And with that, he walked off.]

Haruki: [Kiki held my cheek-]

Haruki: […]

Kiki: …

Haruki: …

Haruki: I’m…okay.

Kiki: Yeah…yeah that’s good.

Haruki: …INTRODUCTIONS!

Kiki: YEAH!!

Haruki: [Kiki and I walk over to a very tall guy and a girl with a long French braid.]

Haruki: […the same girl with a pocket full of teeth.]

???: N-No, please, I don’t n-need anymore, thanks…

???: Please, I insist. They’re my best teeth. They top my tier list.

???: Tierlist?! You’re s-so weird! That’s g-gross-!

???: I am a dentist. It makes sense.

Haruki: [After…whatever that was, the girl noticed Kiki and I standing there.]

Haruki: [This is going to sound so mean, but she radiates crazy vibes]

Kiki: Hi!! We’re…we’re ultimates too.

Haruki: [If Kiki was timid, then I couldn’t be the only one who thought she was kinda spooky.]

???: You seem scared. I can’t imagine why, hehehe.

???: I sure can!

Haruki: Er- I’m Haruki Douzono, the Ultimate Cyborg, and this is Kiki Gunji, the Ultimate Beekeeper.

Kiki: I beelieve we’ll be great friends!!

Haruki: [Didn't she already use that one?]

???: Cyborg? What t-the hell is that? It sounds l-like a sci-fi movie.

Haruki: I know, I know. It’s just how it is. The government helped me in here.

???: Eito, that was quite rude of you, no need to be so mean.

???: And I can use you being a cyborg to my advantage, hehehe.

Kiki: No you won’t, at least, you won’t until you introduce yourself!!

Chinatsu: Where are my manners? I’m Chinatsu Reni, Ultimate Dentist. You can also call me Ms. Reni. Trust me, I always have great ideas.

Kiki: Is that why you were talking about teeth earlier??

Haruki: [The tall man makes a frantic “stop talking” motion.]

Haruki: [Unfortunately, Kiki didn’t notice.]

Chinatsu: Yes. Teeth, I love teeth. They’re so strange.

Chinatsu: All so different, yet so simple.

Chinatsu: They’re all a piece of art, which is why I fill my pockets with them at all times.

Haruki & Kiki: You what-?

???: I t-tried to warn you.

Haruki: [He crossed his arms and watched as Chinatsu reached into her pockets.]

Haruki: [When her hands resurfaced, there were…animal teeth in both hands.]

Chinatsu: Go ahead, take some. As a gift for our meeting.

Kiki: I mean- I’m good!! I like your bear and deer teeth, though!!

Haruki: Yeah, no thanks.

Chinatsu: You recognize these teeth? Impressive!!

Chinatsu: Let’s talk about animal teeth.

Haruki: [Kiki looked rather intimidated as Chinatsu got closer.]

Haruki: [Oh, I have an idea.]

Haruki: [I pointed towards the tall guy.]

Haruki: What’s your name and ultimate?

???: E-Eep- dammit, I thought you’d forgotten a-about me.

Kiki: Yeah! Let’s talk about you now!!

Kiki: And never think about teeth again!!

Chinatsu: Awww…

Chinatsu: But let’s talk about my sweet Chimura.

???: I j-just met you, weird girl!

Eito: Ugh…I’m Eito Chimura…Ultimate E-Electrician or something! Who c-cares! I don’t!

Chinatsu: He’s a bit unhappy with his ultiamte.

Eito: SHH!

Kiki: It's nice to meet you!! I like your belt!!

Eito: Y-You’re lying to me, rude.

Haruki: She’s being genuine.

Kiki: What Haruki said!!

Eito: Oh, then…then t-thanks.

Haruki: [He put up a strong front, but he smiled to himself.]

Haruki: [He’s just a big softie.]

Chinatsu: You should listen to his little stutter. It’s adorable.

Eito: CHINATSUUUUU! NOOOO!

Kiki: Okay, okay, we’ll stop talking about you.

Kiki: Didja to manage to find any traps or anything??

Eito: The only scary thing I found h-here was Chinatsu.

Chinatsu: Awww, you flatter me, Chimura.

Haruki: Alright, well be careful, guys.

Kiki: Wait!! Eito, you’re an electrician, right??

Eito: Yeah.

Kiki: Could you try to check the wiring of how these trap doors work??

Eito: …they’re trap doors. Pressure system.

Eito: I mean, c-come on.

Haruki: Hey, leave her be. She just asked a question.

Kiki: It’s okay, Haruki, I sounded kinda dumb-

Haruki: No, you didn’t.

Haruki: Quit being a jerk.

Eito: I didn’t m-mean to be…s-sorry…

Chinatsu: You leave Chimura alone!

Haruki: You made Kiki-

Haruki: [Kiki grabbed my hand and dragged me away before I said anything else.]

Haruki: […I don’t know what came over me. And he waning even being that rude.]

Kiki: Haruki, thanks for standing up for me, but-

Kiki: I just really wanted to get away from that dentist!! She scared me!!

Haruki: …oh, sorry.

Haruki: [Oops.]

Haruki: [Kiki and I walk over to the guy with the riding crop.]

???: Ahahaha! Success!

Haruki: [He seemed to be having a great time.]

Haruki: [Doing what? No idea.]

Kiki: Heyyyyy!! Whatcha up to?

Haruki: [He whipped around with a terrible, wicked smile on his face.]

???: Ohhhhh, you’ll see, you beautiful beekeeper and sexy cyborg!

Haruki: …huh?

Haruki: [Before I had time to process what he said, he stomped on the ground.]

Haruki: [Where he stomped seemed to have triggered something!]

Kiki: Look!! Murder hornets!! Get-

???: Ah ah ahhhh! Watch and learn!

Haruki: [As the hornets raced towards us, he simply pointed his riding crop at them.]

Haruki: [As if magic, one Hornets flew to the ground below, “planning” their attack.]

???: In three…two…one!

Haruki: [The moment he said one…doors below the hornets opened, sending them into the fiery pit we saw earlier.]

Haruki: […woah.]

Kiki: That was…

Kiki: INHUMANE!! THEY MAY BE HORNETS, BUT THEY’RE CREATURES!!!

???: What a fun way of saying hello, beekeeper.

???: Sighhh, your temper really is short from what I’ve seen, hehehe!

Kiki: SHUSH!!! YOU JUST BURNT-

Haruki: Kiki, he’s too stubborn, I can tell.

???: Listen to your friend, Kiki, darling.

Kiki: Hmph! Fine!

???: Gooood, I’m sorry for souring my introduction, though.

Kiki: It was soured the moment you sp-

Haruki: Kiki.

Haruki: [I don’t mean to be rude to her, but she really needs to check her temper.]

Haruki: [If we start fights with everyone here, then I’ll really have to master my cybernetic powers.]

Haruki: [Because we’ll have to be fighting off an angry mob.]

Tomoki: I suppose it’s my turn to have a moment. I am the one, the only, Tomoki Ebihara! Ultimate Unlucky Student! Make sure to stay on my good side, or something…unfortunate might happen to you, hahaha!

Haruki: Unlucky Student? How is that an ultimate!

Haruki: [He laughed and put his arm around my shoulder.]

Haruki: [I looked to Kiki for help. She smiled.]

Haruki: [Okay, this is my karma for telling her to be quiet.]

Tomoki: Haruki, my man, my dear, my sweet cyborg-

Haruki: Stop calling me sweet cyborg, that’s not a core part of who I a-

Tomoki: Right, sweet cyborg. I’ve honed my craft over many, many years!

Tomoki: I can turn my misfortune off of myself onto others!

Tomoki: Which is how I demolished that hornet colony!

Tomoki: Fascinating stuff, no?

Haruki: You sound like a sadist.

Kiki: And a bug squasher!

Tomoki: Hmhmhm, bite your tongue and count to ten or my wrath shall be upon youuuu!

Haruki: [Kiki and I both looked at each other, and silently agreed.]

Haruki: [This guy is nuts, crazy, and quite possibly, bananas.]

…

Tomoki: Good! Good! I’m glad you all can keep your mouths shut!

Kiki: Only because we were left speechless…

Tomoki: Awww, it’s okay, dear.

Haruki: [He set his hand on Kiki’s shoulder.]

Tomoki: Many people are left speechless by my handsome face and grand power!

Kiki: …okay, I’m done with this, Haruki, let’s bounce.

Haruki: Agreed.

Tomoki: Leaving? So soon? A pity! I was starting to become friends with you!

Tomoki: Also, watch out on your left in three, two, o-

Haruki: [I shoved Kiki out of the way of a random, flaming rock.]

Haruki: [Seriously, this guy is insane!]

Tomoki: Ohhhh well. Bye byeeee! Have a fun time! Love you, sweet cyborg!

Haruki: Kiki, walk faster, walk faster!

Kiki: You don’t have to tell me twice!!