#udic

Anyway, moving on; Detective Cameron Malhotra and I had an interview earlier -- and by that I mean they interrogated me -- about the fugitive that has been running around our city, dangerous and rectangular-shaped. They said to tell them what I knew, and I replied all the information I had was given to me by them, to which I was forced to listen to the Barney song on repeat. Besides that, I learned that the police are no closer to finding the criminal than Brenda is to convincing us that her lemon bars were homemade. No one even likes lemon bars. 

To all who purchased a homemade treat at our bake sale, thank you. Your contributions help us keep this paper running and keep our overlords in mild contentment. 

In this time, two organizations have been created in favor of and against the likes of Gerald the Gay Closet. The United Dwellers for Incarcerating Closets (UDIC) was created by Maggie Trinough, who is the spearhead of the resistance against Gerald the Gay Closet. A resistance to her resistance was created to resist against the original resistors by resisting. The People for Regulating Organizations Trying to Exclude Closets (PROTEC) is a mighty, silent, and devastating force from the likes of which we have never seen except for that one time they marched into Trinough's speech and unironically said "Stop resisting." We have never seen them any other time.

Also, a rectangular-shaped human has been rampaging our city, taking the attention and resources of our police force.

However, I would like to take a moment and talk about something else.

There is a room, seemingly normal, which does not, in fact, exist.

It certainly seems to. There is an occupant of the room, going about its daily life, interacting with other people, but I assure you, readers, that it does not exist. Do not be fooled.

I cannot tell you where this room is, because it is nowhere, but everywhere at once. This room is impossible to pinpoint. It is possible that our universe will soon collapse under the realization of this absence, ripping and tearing at the seams until there is less than nothing left.

Oh, and we're having a bake sale! Come on down, I made brownies. (Avoid the pecan pie, I think it's poisoned.) Everything is two dollars to five hundred dollars, depending on your net worth. We have cupcakes!

More to follow.

The police have yet to stop the riots downtown, and the UDIC grows ever stronger. Rumor has it they have the support of DC, but this is mere speculation.

A resistance resistance has now fully emerged from the shadows like those mysterious men you can barely remember did yesterday. They call themselves the People for Regulating Organizations Trying to Exclude Closets, or PROTEC for short. They are quiet and calculated, and likely will destroy anyone in their way.

Maggie Trinough made a statement today, declaring that "No one will keep us from justice," while sweating profusely.

The closet still has yet to make an appearance, but the UDIC has grown in numbers dramatically. While yesterday, Maggie Trinough created this organization as a spur of the moment decision during a speech, the UDIC has nearly a dozen members. This is in comparison to most spur of the moment organizations, which mainly consist of two or three people in a basement somewhere. 

There have been rumors of a small resistance to the resistance, a resistance resistance if you will. For now, this is mere speculation, but it is getting increasingly likely that it will soon cross from fantasy to reality, which is a thin and fragile line to begin with. 

The rioters are still rioting, yelling and protesting, but they also have a level of nervousness that makes it seem comical.

PROTEC held a secret meeting that no one knows about, not even its members, to retain maximum security.

During another speech Maggie Trinough had today, a group of silent PROTEC members split the crowd. In unison, they all looked up and said, "We will protect them. Stop resisting." While ironic, they did not seem to realize their irony, and marched away solemnly, leaving the remaining crowd in silence.

A car chase today led to multiple crashes along route 34. Police were chasing a rectangular-shaped and clean-smelling human, driving a stolen tan Corolla in our lovely city. I mean, can you believe it? A tan Corolla? Who drives those?

Happy 31st Birthday to the Ultima Dragons

Today is — as per the FAQ on the Ultima Dragons website — the anniversary of the date that the UDIC was founded: The Ultima Dragons were originally created on February 27, 1992 on Prodigy. They were disbanded in early 1994, but were reestablished on the Internet later that year as the Ultima Dragons Internet Chapter. Since the Prodigy Ultima Dragons club no longer exists, Ultima Dragons can be…

UDIC tiếp tục khẳng định thương hiệu

Với năng lực và uy tín trên thị trường xây dựng, năm 2020, Tổng Công ty UDIC tiếp tục trúng thầu nhiều công trình, hạng mục công trình ở Hà Nội và các tỉnh, thành phố trên cả nước.  Đây không chỉ là những nền tảng vững chắc mà còn giúp tạo sản lượng gối đầu cho Tổng Công ty trong năm 2021 và những năm tiếp theo trong bối cảnh vừa quyết liệt phòng, chống dịch hiệu quả, vừa kịp thời triển khai một…