White people: *trying to impress me* "What you got bumping on the aux cord, shorty?" Me: *already annoyed* "...😒😒😑😒 Tidal" Main obnoxious white guy: "Wow you finna wyling! I'm outchea tryna get turnt to some Future af." Me: "I'm what??? *pause* ....You're what??!?"

My driver, a 30-40-year-old, tall and muscular man: "So you drive Uber too huh? The BEST time to drive is 4am to 9am. I'm telling you." Me, a 139lbs, 23-year-old woman: "Yeah idk how I feel about picking up random people alone at odd hours." Him: *makes a confused face* "You need to stop being so worried. What's the worst someone could do?" Me: *dissociates*

Arriving at a pickup and realizing that you've just entered a rich, white area. It's 3am and the street is completely dark and you are sitting in your out-of-state car with your hazard lights on, parked outside of a huge estate... That you don't live in... And signs on the street say "neighborhood watch 24 hours" ...And you're black. I cancelled the ride.

Me, a black queer feminist who knows Black Lives Matter but also suffers from social anxiety: *sweats*

*quietly begins to sob in the backseat*

"I'm so single 😩😩😩!!"

"Can you slow down? I think there's a Charizard on this block."

👩🏽: "Let's go see the fireworks!" 👨🏻: "I don't feel like it." 👩🏽: "Would you rather we go home and make some fireworks of our own?? 😘😘😘" 👨🏻: "Tehehe well that sounds nice." *PDA* Me: "So... Um... Should I change my destination on Google Maps?" 👩🏽👨🏻: "Uhhh no it's... Um... It's fine... Just... No."