#tua reader insert

2007, the umbrella academy headquarters 

You were hiding in five’s room like most nights. You were lying in his bed, hands intertwined as you made plans for the future

You had made a pact, when you both would turn 18 in 142 days you two would leave together, leaving the umbrella academy and the man you called father even if he wasn’t fatherly at all

‘142 days y/n, and then we are free’ five told you smiling facing you inches apart

You smiled back as you pecked his lips, he smiled through the kiss ‘Where do you want to go? New York, Rio, Paris?’ He asked you, his thumb caressing your cheek

‘Rio sounds nice, beaches, underage alchohol’ you wisper back at him. You two had to be quiet, your relationship secret to your father even if most of your siblings knew 

‘As if that was a problem, i know you use your shape shifting abilities to go buy Klaus alcohol’ he tells you rolling his eyes. It was true, you used your shape shifting abilities to appear older and buy Klaus alchohol so he did not have to steal. You knew he needed it to not see the ghosts, and although it wasn’t right to endorse his dependency you knew he had no choice. Klaus was your favorite , after five of course, and also your best friend, and you really thought you were helping him by helping him being high prevented him from being persecuted by ghosts. 

 you giggle as you kiss him, you absorb his powers, as it happens every time you touch one of the umbrella academy members, and de-maratelize yourself, appearing a moment later in front of the bed with a bottle of wine

‘Not complaining now uhm?’ You tell him, five shakes his head as he brings you towards himself by pulling you from the hoops of you jeans

‘Of you? Never’ He replies, you kiss him again as you push him back on the bed, bottle forgotten on the nightstand 

2019

Reginald was dead, Pogo had found him. You could not say you were saddened by his departure, what worried you was the inevitable return of your siblings, especially of luther the last remaining one at the academy with you. You and luther never got along, you knew deep down he envied what you and five had, as he and allison never had the courage to act on similar feelings. He hated you also for refusing to collaborate with dad, focusing only on finding five. Thankfully in the last years he had been on the moon leaving only you in the mansion with grace, pogo, and Reginald.

You were in your room getting ready to pick up klaus from rehab before the others inevitably arrived, when you heard a knock on your window

'hellooo sis!' you heard as you saw a klaus clearly high knocking at your window, you tried not to smile at your favorite brother

'klaus! I was supposed to pick you up remember ?’ you told him as you opened the window and he climbed in

'I guessed It was a busy day and thought to get out sooner! We are orphans!' he squeeled as you tried not to laugh as he hugged you

'try to look more sad with luther or we will never hear the end of it' you replied 'where is ben?' you asked him, you had touched klaus, thus absorbed his powers but you could not see your shared dead brother, 

'around, he will appear sooner of later' klaus said as he opened your wardrobe to search for a new outfit

'do not still from my room or - ' you told him as he waved at you leavign your room 'yes yes not your room or five's I know!' He told you leaving to find something to steal, you just shook your head

You fell back on your bed turning to look at the last photo of you and five, it was a polaroid taken while you and him were laughing on the floor of his room, you sighed as you heard more of your siblings come in

‘Let the show begin’ you thought as you got up

-.-.-.

Vanya entered the house, looking around, ‘y/n?’ She asked but instead found allison and Diego. After ackwards greetings she roamed the library where she encountered Pogo and stopped in front of five’s portrait, as they talked about her book and five Vanya asked Pogo ‘how long has it been?’

‘13 years, five months and 14 days’ you say behind her as you lean on the library, arms crossed as you   Avoid looking at your long-lost boyfriend portrait 

‘Y/n’ she greets you as you two hug

‘Vanya’ you reply ‘long time no see’ you add. 

You two called sometimes but she had distances herself from the family, and after her autobiography even more. You were the only one she was in contact with

‘How have you been? The show coming up nicely?’ You ask her

‘I think so, I can get you a ticket if you want’ she asks almost shily

‘Sure let’s talk about it another day’ you reply  as her smiles fades as she nods politely, fidgeting with her book, you eyes falls on it

‘Did they already give you shit about it?’ You ask referencing to Diego and luther

‘Yah..’ she replies voice low

‘Well i liked it.’ You reply sincerely

‘I think you were the only one.’

‘Someone had to spill those secrets vanya. Also you portrayed me and five as doomed lovers, and not as a crazy woman who can’t let go the boy she loved half a lifetime ago. So i quite appreciated it, people even sends me leads on him, none worked of course’ you reply again with a laugh that does not sound joyful, vanya gives you a weak smile as she turns towards five’s portrait 

‘Do you remember, i used to make those sandwiches and leaving the lights on. I was afraid he would come back and by not finding us he would leave again’. She says with a fond smile. As klaus was your favorite, vanya was five’s, you two didn’t give her a hard time for her luck of powers, differently from allison and luther 

‘You just summarized the last 13 years of my life’ you replied with a dark laugh that didn’t reach you eyes 

After five had disappeared you spend years looking for him, or to find a way to time travel to go search for him. You had searched all the other remaining people born with superpowers to see if someone had a power you could absorb to help your researches but none had the same abilities

Klaus, ben and Vanya had helped you initially, because they were close to you. Allison and Luther had been useless and Diego had stopped soon. 

Vanya left as soon of age, the same did Diego, you could not blame them, that had been your plan too. After Ben’s death the following year also allison and klaus left, even if he would come back often as spent all the money he could find on drugs , you and luther remained, he was the only one loyal to Reginald. You stayed waiting for five.

‘I’m sorry’ she replies eyes low

‘Of what? Getting out of this shithole? You did what i could not do alone vanya. Never apologize for leaving behind this place’ you tell her squeezing her shoulder

‘Come we have a so-called father to bury’ you add with you head pointing at the courtyard but before you could go there a storm appeared outisde

2007

As the bell rang, as at every mealtime you and the others walked into the dining room, once Reginald walked in and gave you permission, you all set down to eat. You sat as always between Five and Klaus, while Vanya set next to Five. Klaus rolled a joint behind him, while Luther and Allison exchanged flirtatius looks, but you could only watch five that was looking at Reginald with angry eyes. You took his hand under the table to try reassure and appease him and he sqeezed it, but the calm was short as he then stabbed the table with his knife as you all turned to look at him.

    "Number Five?" Reginald acknowledged him. Five let the knife go and clenched his jaw.

    "I have a question." He stated

    "Knowledge is an admirable goal, but you know the rules. No talking during mealtime. You are interrupting Herr Carlson." He referred to the voice coming from the record player. Five  pushed his plate away to state that he was not eating, turning back to his father.

You had tried to dissuase him many times, he had got fixated on time traveling something that scared you and that reginals did not approve, but five didn’t listen

'five' you whispered as he sqeezed your hand reasuringly before speaking again despite your wishes

    "I want to time travel." he  stated

    "No." reginald replied

    "But I'm ready," He stood from his chair. "I've been practicing my spatial jumps, just like you said." he said jumping  next to their father 

    "A spatial jump is trivial when compared with the unknowns of time travel. One is like sliding along the ice, the other is akin to descending blindly into the depths of the freezing water and reappearing as an acorn."

 "Well, I don't get it." five admited, the air tense

    "Hence the reason you're not ready." Reginald set down his glass while Five glanced over at  you and then Vanya, both were shaking your heads as you looked at him with pleading eyes asking him to stop. He turned his gaze away from you as he replied  "I'm not afraid."

    "Fear isn't the issue. The effects it might have on your body, even your mind, are far too unpredictable, Now I forbid you to talk about this anymore."

Five clenched his jaw as he looked at you before storming out

"Number Five!" Reginald called after him as you pushed your chair away from the table and ran after him

    "Five! Where are you going? " you shouted worried

    "Number Five, Number Eight, you haven't been excused! Come back here!" your father shouted but you did not care, you ran after your boyfriend 

'five wait for me!' you shouted as you both left the gate of the school before he slowed down waiting for you to reach him. you grabbed his arm

'where are you going?' you ask him worried

'we are leaving now' he replied serious 'what?' you asked looking at him in confusion

'we go now. I can travel in time I know it, we could go everywhere, even to the Freddy Mercury’s concert you wanted so badly to see' he explains takng your hands,as his anger is replaced by hope 

'five…' you tell him worried, this was not the plan

'please, I need to do this love' he tells you almost pleading. You look at him in the eyes, this could be the stupidiest or the craziest idea he ever had, but you would follow him

'ok' you reply, he lets out a breath of relief he did not know he was holding

He grabs your face and  kisses you, you smile as you devour each others before you both separate for air

‘Let me try first. I will be back in a few minutes and then we leave’  he tells you

'no we do it together' you tell him as hold on his jacket

'no I first need to try to see the effects then we go' he tells you 

'five…' you try to persuade him

'I'll be back in a minute' he tells you before kissing you again and jumping in time. There was snow where he arrived, signaling a jump foward in time

"Not ready, my ass"  he laughed  clearly pleased with himself 'ok another time just to be sure' he said as he jumped forward, this time though the entrire surroundings were in shambles, evey thing was broken or on fire. his face fell as fear creeped in 

'y/n' he muttered in fear as he ran back to the academy that was in shumbles

' y/n!' he shouted then 'vanya ! dad !' his panic grew  as He tried to go back in time, his powers appearing but with no results 

'come on! Come on!' he begged trying to jump but he was stucked

He falls on his knees  looking at what once called home now on fire 'I'm sorry y/n' he muttered tears pooling at his eyes, as he raised his eyes again he saw his biggest fear came to life. He saw you among the debris. 

'no' he murmured as he got up and ran to the scene. You were older than this morning when he left you but he would reconise you anywhere, and you were dead

‘Y/n, no, wake up wake up! please’ He shouts shaking your body to try to wake up, but you don't move an inch, your body lifeless. he cradles your head in his laps as a sob escape him 'please love' he tries again  as he cries against your forehead. After what were probably hours his gaze falls on what you are holding a newspaper with the date

1st of april 2019, the day  that you die, the day the world ends

-.-.-.

You waited there on the side walk for five as minutes passed. You were smiling not only the day you had waited for years had arrived but also you were going to timetravel. 

But as minutes passed your good mood started to fade as he had not come back yet. Minutes turned into hours, you looked around confused to not see him come back. As time passed fear creeped in you. He would have not left you, meaing much worse things had to had happened.

As night fell you ran back to the academy in tears shouting for klaus and vanya.

You all looked for him but Five had disappeared, along with your future

2019

You all rushed outside as you witnessed a blue sphere of energy appearing in the garden

'What is that?' Diego asked

'is a time tunnel or a black hole' you replied as hope creeped into you. As you had studied timetravel to find five you had become a little expert

You heard a shout and suddenly five, looking exactly as he was the day he disappeared appeared falling in the garden 'fuck' he said looking at himself in his 17 years old body. He raised his eyes finding his siblings in front of him as his gaze finally fell on you

'y/n?' he asked His mission to save the world momentary forgotten as the moment he had waited for 45 years had finally arrived, his eyes were longing a much as yours, as the siblings were in shock, you pushed luther away to reach five

You stood in front of him taking in the sight of him 

‘Five?’ You asked reaching for his face ‘Is it really you?’ You asked, he held you hand that you had placed on his face as he nodded

‘It's me love’ he replied, the first time you were hearing his voice in 13 years, tears pulled in your eyes as you grabbed him and hugged him tight, a happy and tense laugh leaving you as he hugged you back, his face in your hair to take in the familiar scent of your shampoo  that he had dreamed of for all those years

He let you go to take a look at you and as he reached foward to finally kiss you, you slapped him hard across his face

He let you go stumbling back due to the impact, his hand resting on his cheek that you had just slapped as he looked at you in confusion, but he can’t blame you, in the end he ruined both of your lives

‘This was for the last 13 years’ you replied as you stormed inside the academy 

It wasn’t the reaction the other expected. For someone who had waited for 13 years for this day to come you looked silent and angry, the siblings, including five all walked in as he made his way to the underground kitchen 

-----

‘Nothing changed ‘ five says looking arounf the kitchen as he starts to make his peanut butter and marshmallow sandwich, all the Hargreaves are looking at him expecting an explanation. You are seated arm crossed next to him as you can’t tear your eyes away but can’t either speak, too many emotions happening at the same time. Longing, rage, confusion, happiness 

 "So are we gonna talk about what just happened?" Luther finally speaks 

‘I was waiting for you all to leave expect y/n in fact’ five replies continuing to make his sandwich 

    "It's been 13 years." Luther replies 'we want to know too what happened'

    "It's been a lot longer than that." Five replies as he blinks on the kitchen counter to take more marshamallows before blinking back at the table

‘I did not miss that’ luther says in annoyance as you internally think ‘hell i missed that a lot’ 

    "Where've you been? All this time" Diego asked jumping in.

    "The future. It's shit, by the way." Five answered. ‘Of course’ you though, ‘that is were i looked for the last 13 years’

    "How did you get back?" Vanya questioned. Without looking up from you, Five answered,

    "In the end, I had to project my consciousness forward into a suspended quantum state version of myself that exists across every possible instance of time."

"That makes no sense." Diego said at the same time you said ‘well that makes sense’

    "Well, it would if you were smarter." Five replied before smirking at you, you smirked back, you missed making fun of the Hargreeves without him

    "How long were you there?" Vanya asked

    "Forty-five years... Give or take." He replied with a hint of sadnesses, he kept on looking at you studying all your reactions. Although you were silent and he answered his siblings it was as if you two were having a private conversation. You eyes fell as guilt creeped into you, all your anger vanished as you realized that 13 years in the comfort of your home were nothing compared to what five had experienced alone in the future. You instinctively reached foward and placed your hand on his arm, he gave you a weak appreciate smile before luther interrupted the moment 

    "You're saying you're 62?" He asked, the question you all had

    "No, My consciousness is 62. Apparently, my body is now 17 again." He finally took a bite of his sandwich annoyed by his siblings not understanding what was so clear to you and him. 

Vanya asked    "How does that even work?"

    "Delores kept saying the equations were off... bet she's laughing now." He said as it was nothing, you tried to not let jealously creep into you at the name of another woman

    "That's it? That's all you have to say?" Allison asked

    "What else is there to say?’ Five asked almost mockingly 'Now if you don’t mind , me and y/n have to talk' he said as he took your arm and bipped you both in his room.

Gosh if you missed the sensation of space traveling. You close your eyes enjoying the feeling before opening them again

Five's old room is exactly as he left it, but still clean as you asked it to be left always in order ready to welcome five back. it does not look abandoned , it looks like the day he screwed everything up. Five looks around before sitting on his bed, automatically you do the same, it's almost second nature. You two sit there in silence as you gaze your fingertips on his cheek that you had slapped. He places his hand on top of yours holding it there giving you a longing smile

‘I should have not slapped you’ you finally speak

‘It’s okay, I understand your rage, believe me i lived with it for 45 years’ he replies his thumb caressing your hand ‘I missed you so much, you have no idea’  he ads

‘Believe me i do’ you reply mixed emotions rising again, your hand falls from his face, as you look around the room, his hand reaches yours as you intertwine it with his. You close your eyes, your emotions all bursting out as you start to cry, he engulfed you in his arms as you cried to his chest, he tries suiting you as a single tear threatened to fall from his eyes too. You two in you hug fall back in his bed, You enjoy the sensation you had missed for 13 years, of being in his arms in this room. You finally stop crying but neither of you dont move of a inch, enjoying to be in each others arms, your head on his jackets as his arms are around you

‘Thank you’ he tells you finally 

‘For what’ you ask wiping your tears with the back of your hand as you look up at him from his chest

‘For looking for me. It was useless but i appreciated it. Even if i wish you didn’t waste your life on me’ he answers looking at you

‘How -?’ You ask standing up from your spot now sitting on the bed as he too straightens up 

‘Vanya’s book, i read it a million times, to feel close to you’ he explains ‘you never gave up on me, you changed your plans for me, that is why your reaction at my return should not be surprising’

‘So you realize that it was all your fault?all just To try prove yourself to dad? That you abandon me ?’ You reply anger rising as you stand up finally speaking what had plagued you for 13 years ‘I loved you but as year passed that love became anger, I hated you for a long time. For leaving me, for shattering our future, my future. I stayed here right were you left me, never giving up on you even if you were just a memory, hating myself for not being able to let you go, for staying in the same place i had vowed to leave. All for the hope of your return. We could have had it all , but we didn’t because of you’

‘Do you think it was easy for me?’ He replies anger rising in him too ‘i lived on insects to survive, we adapted and we survived for four decades, you always told me snacks never expire, well that was bullshit i tell you. I survived and fought for half a lifetime to be here now.’ he says standing up too

‘We?’ You ask stopping in your tracks, you cant help yourself 

‘Me and dolores’ he admits

You tried not to feel a sting of jealousy, but how could you blame him? 45 years were a long time

‘At least you were not alone’ you mean to say it as something positive but it comes out as sarcastic

 'don't you think I did not try evetyhtign to come back to you? ’ He asks you in ager, but is an anger full of sorrow 

Your anger was replaced with sadness as his pain 

’I tried everyday to find you.’ Is your only reply, anger now disappeared 

‘I tried everyday to come back to you’  he replies weakly too extending his hand towards you, you take it. The past is the past , the anger now faded left with only hope for the future 

‘You are here that is all that matters’ you reply voice laced with love he smiles as he places his hands on your hips

'I need to tell you so many things’ he tells you his longing tone matching yours 

‘ i want to know eveything’ you reply your eyes almost begging to feel close to him. He leans towards you and you finally kiss pouring in all your build up emotions. You shifted your form back to when you were 17 

He opened his eyes smiling

'what?’ You ask him ‘This way we look the same age. I dont want it to be weird’ you state as he shakes his head

‘So were do we start?’ You ask not letting him go

'I need a cofee First' he replies and you laugh

'I'm coming with you, you are not leaving my sight again' you tell him pointing a finger to his chest

'I don’t plan on doing it ever again love, this time we stick together' he replies before pecking your lips again and jumping in space to his closet, he puts on one of the uniforms as you try not to laugh  at the sight, he gives you side eyes

'our usual place?’ You ask him leaning on the door while he changes

He nods, once he is ready you jump to the parking lot taking your car as you drive to the diner, your hands still intertwined 

-.-.-.-.

You entered the diner, where you had spent much of your childhood, you had not gone back in years., without five it wasn't the same.

 Five pulls a chair for you as you sit down and he follows next to you

‘What can I bring you kids?’ The lady asks as  you try not to laugh at the 'kids' part

‘Coffee please’ you reply looking at five 

The lady brings the coffee as you give her the dollars

’you two are such a cute couple, is nice to see young people still believing in love’ she adds all lovely dovely before going back to the kitchen 

‘She is right you are cute, old man’ you tease him as he smiles at you, your laugh had always been contagious for him, but before he can reply  Suddenly armed men arrived inside the diner, you grew tense at the sight

‘Five’ you whispered in alert but he seemed very calm

‘Don’t worry, they are idiots’ he replies calmly as you instead grow tense as they surround you 

‘Come with us, she want to talk to you’ the man commands, five just sips his coffee 

‘don’t be difficult. We dont want to kill two kids. Going home with that on our conscience’ the man adds as you take the knife on the table trying to dont get noticed, knowing that a fight is about to happen 

‘Don’t worry you are not going home’ five replies before stabbing one of the attacker, you follow him in the fight, as always working as a well oiled machine

‘Who are these people!’ You shout at him as You jump and shapeshift into one of them stealing their guns as you and five kills every attacker 

‘I’ll explain later!’ He shouts back at you before directing his attention towards them ‘hey dickheads’ he shouts at them before strangling one with his tie as bullets flew everywhere

Once you are done and the attackers are gone, five  takes a knife and plunge it in his arm as your eyes widen in horror as he removes something you reocnise as a locator , he drops it as it was nothing before taking your hand and jumping you both outside the diner

‘What is going on? who were those  people  ? what do they want from you?’ You had so many questions, this was totally not the reunion you expected

‘I will explain eveything as i promised but you need to know the most important thing,  The word is ending in 8 days y/n and only we can stop it’ he says with urgency, you stop in your track

‘What?’ You asked in shock, when he said he was in the apocalypse you thought centuries away not eight days 

‘The apocalypse were i ended up, i saw you dead, all of you were dead, and you were holding a newspaper, the day said april  1st 2019, that is in 8 days’ he explained holding your arms as you tried to take the info in

‘How-?’’

‘We can stop it but you have to trust me’ he says before you can ask further questions he squeeses your arm ‘please I don’t want to loose you again’ he ads his tone changing from urgency to almost a plea

’You wont’ you reply with conviction, he nods at you as he pecks your lips again, you kiss him back with the same urgency

‘I’ll tell you eveything’ he says again as he lets you go before taking your hand an jumping away as blue light emanates from both of you as you two disappear into the night  

Timeline 1: We could have had it all

Five Hargreaves in ‘Other characters master list’

Luther (Number 1)

- Luther was frankly amazed at the powers his darling S/O possessed.

- He is lowkey terrified of you, though.

- You've scared him way too much by suddenly popping out of a shadowy corner where you were chilling.

- And the look of horror on his face when he sees you hanging upside down on the ceiling like a bat.

- Additionally, he's seen you in action against bad guys, and frankly, he never wants to be on your bad side.

- Due to your teleportation, you love teaming up with Five to wreak havoc on poor Luther.

- At the end of the day, Luther loves you for who you are.

- Even if who you are is a frightening superhuman who could kill him in his sleep.

Diego (Number 2)

- Diego, the ever protective boyfriend is grateful for the powers you have due to the fact that you are able to protect yourself with them.

- He is fascinated by you, and always seeks to know more about your abilities.

- You're more than happy to show him.

- He definitely views you as a reptile of some sort. With your night vision, your camouflaging, and your ability to cling to surfaces.

- Teases you a lot. Calls you a lizard.

- God help anyone else that teases you, though. Diego will hunt them down for daring to say anything about his precious lizard.

- At the end of the day, Diego embraces the amazing (person?) that is you, HIS reptile <3

Allison (Number 3)

- Allison has yet to see the extent of your powers, and as a result, she's always bracing herself to see more.

- She doesn't like her own powers, but she loves your so much, and is constantly reminding you not to shy away from them.

- Sometimes, she intentionally throws Claire's ball up on a roof and tells you its stuck there just so that she can watch you in action.

- Most definitely plays with your tail as an unconscious habit.

- She has a childlike innocence surrounding her when it comes to your powers. Always wanting to learn more.

- You're so grateful to have in your life, someone who doesn't run away from you.

Klaus (Number 4)

- Klaus legitimately just views you as a normal person. And out of all the siblings, he's the least likely to be scared of your powers.

- In fact, he sees them as a party trick, much to your dismay and amusement.

- You always hear him showing off about your powers to thin air. He tells you he's talking to a ghost, then proceeds to ask you to display your powers.

- The ghosts are always impressed.

- Despite how normal he finds you, he does acknowledge that not everybody does.

- So this sweet bean never misses an opportunity to remind you how precious you are to him.

Five (Number 5)

- Five has seen it all. From the powers his crazy siblings have, to the world ending. Frankly, you don't surprise him.

- That doesn't mean he's not secretly scared of you.

- When he first met you, and saw that your teleportation matched his own powers, alongside you possessing many other powers, he knew you were different. That's what drew him to you.

- He finds your powers convenient. He takes you with him wherever he goes, and your ability to keep up with him definitely helps.

- Mini assassin boi will end anyone who speaks bad about you.

Ben (Number 6)

- As a kid, all Ben wanted was a normal life. Life with you is far from normal though.

- You'll randomly teleport to him just to give him a little spook, and the little squeak he lets out is the most precious thing ever.

- Thanks to your heightened flexibility, you always win twister during game nights (much to his annoyance).

- Ben doesn't feel a particular way about your powers. He honestly doesn't mind them. He's much like Klaus in that sense.

- However, if there are ever times you feel insecure about your powers, Ben fully understands and is there for you. He always validates you.

- Maybe life with you is far from normal, but Ben wouldn't want it any other way,

Vanya (Number 7)

- Vanya is in love with your powers, and how freely you fall in rhythm with them.

- As she discovered her own powers very late, you help her learn how to control them better, and she is so thankful.

- She grew up in a house with "6 world famous assholes" who had powers of their own, so if you think you can faze her, you're wrong.

- Sometimes, she'll randomly wake you up at night to ask questions about your powers.

- "Why are you blue?"

- "Oh my god Vanya, you can't just ask me why I'm blue."

His silhouette leaned against the doorway, arms crossed over his chest and legs crossed at the ankles. He always had a flair for the dramatic. Showing up when you least expected it, carrying on a conversation that had started without you. Most times it was a conversation where Klaus said something to upset him.

But this time, you knew what he was talking about.

It was a conversation you had been meaning to have.

With a heavy sigh, you pushed away from the counter, dusting your hands of the excess flour. You opened your mouth, but quickly shut it, rethinking your approach. Looking up at him, you found he was already staring back at you, his brown eyes somber yet curious.

“You’ve got a million reasons to hesitate,” you sang hesitantly. Holding his gaze, your voice turned wistful. “But darling, the future’s better than yesterday.”

The fan continued to whirr as, despite his better judgement, he waited. Ears straining, heart hoping to hear more.

“I wasted so much time on people that reminded of you,” you trailed off, shaking your head, and reaching behind to untie the apron straps from around your waist. “Gave you a million reasons to walk away.”

He whispered your name in reproach, his head turning away. He couldn’t let himself hope that someone like you would be interested in starting anything with something like him. You only knew half of it after all.

“I’ll build a house out of the mess and all the broken pieces…” your voice grew closer. When your circled to stand in front of him, his eyes hesitantly lifted to meet yours. He could see the hope clear upon your face, as a smile tugged at the corner of your mouth. “I’ll make up for all of your tears. I’ll give you the best years.”

Your hand reached for his, but he pulled his arms tighter across himself, fear trembling through him.

“I’ll give you the best years,” you promised as your fingers lifted to his face. Seeing your intention, Ben’s eyes squeezed shut, his face twisted in anticipation of the inevitable disappointment to follow. But instead, you continued to sing. “Past love, burned out like a cigarette, I promise, darling, you won’t regret the best years.”

With a controlled exhale, his body slowly relaxed.

If he was alive, he knew exactly what he would do. He would raise his eyes to yours and take your reaching hand into his. He would pull you close to feel your softness against him, to smell the vanilla and cinnamon in your hair.

And he would murmur his own promises: I wanna hold your hair when you drink too much and carry you home when you cannot stand up.

You would look up at him in surprise before clutching onto the front of his jacket and pulling him deeper into your kitchen. He would spin you across the linoleum floor as he sang, You did all these things for me when I was half a man for you, then lift you onto the counter. Plant his hands on either side of your legs and lean his forehead to rest against yours.

I wanna hold your hand while we’re growing up.

But it wasn’t real.

Eyelashes raised and he stared at you with the deepest sadness you had ever seen.

“I can’t,” he said. “You can’t live your life with a ghost.”

“You are no ghost to me, Ben Hargreeves,” you said with such a force of certainty, you had him second guessing his own reality.

When your fingers finally brushed his face, two dry pads on his cheek, he jerked back in surprise.

Wide-eyed and slightly panicked, his hand lifted to his face, covering the space you had touched.

He had felt that.

Felt you.

.Saturday Night is Karaoke Night!

Thank you for requesting, nonny! I hope you liked it. 💜

The man’s fingers tightened against your bruised flesh “She was just an innocent girl,” He ground out behind clenched teeth “and you fucking murdered her like she was nothing!” This time was a punch to the stomach which made you wheeze and sputter. You groaned quietly in pain as you tried to double over but couldn’t, the restraints around your wrist preventing you from slouching forward. 

“It was nothing personal, man.” You pant out, the blooding coating your lips soaking your tongue once again “This isn’t gonna bring her back though.” Nausea twisted at your stomach from his last blow. With your eyes staring down at his legs you tried to focus on your breathing and calm yourself down. 

He let out a dangerous growl and reached behind him, you could already guess where this was going. The outline of his shadow shifted and there was a beat of silence before you heard the signature click of a gun cocking. Slowly you lifted your head and looked past the barrel pointed at your head and to him, his cheeks were stained with tears. His anger merged with grief dangerously. You looked into his eyes and watched them pool with more tears and a snarl curled his lips. 

“I’ll make you suffer, you bitch.” He lowered to aim at your stomach and fired. The pain was searing and shot through your entire abdomen instantly, white hot fire ripping through your veins making you yell out in pain. “I guess that’s one thing I can thank you for… At least you made it quick!” He yelled out and shot you again this time in the shoulder tearing a wail from your throat. 

Tears were streaming down your blood stained cheeks from the pain, he gave you absolutely no time to recover from the fiery pain that consumed you. His fist came down against your cheek yet again,  black spots splotching your vision, you knew you wouldn’t be able to keep yourself awake much longer. The pain rippled through you in pulsing waves, washing over you entirely until you were drowning in it. There was no escape from your past, wherever you went your sins would always follow. 

--- 

There were muffled bangs coming from inside your home, the sound was unmistakable. Axel felt the anger rise inside his body, he threw open the car door not even bothering to look if his brothers were following behind. He should have suspected this, his job wasn’t exactly the safest, it left the people he cared about in danger whether or not they were involved. He should have considered your life would be on the line because of him. 

With all of his might he kicked the door open, the wood splintering around the handle and slamming violently into the wall surly leaving a dent. The living room was a wreck and it reeked of blood. That was the last straw that sent him into a blind rage, his eyes immediately locked onto his prey and he almost felt a growl crawl up his throat. 

The man’s eyes grew wide when he turned around, a gun clutched clumsily in his unskilled hand. He let out a startled gasp and looked between the three men that stared him down. Axel let his eyes drift over to the second figure in the room, slumped over in a chair from the dining room was you, fresh blood soaking your favorite shirt in multiple places. Your face was shadowed by a veil of hair, the sight of you like this was enough to make him see red. 

Axel looked back over at the man, he stamped over to him in three strides, the blonde’s hand came to clutch your captors throat in a bruising grip. His blunt nails dug into the man’s flesh and he stepped forward a few times and slammed the shorter man against the wall. The framed pictures hung up on the samee wall shake from the impact. 

The man pleaded pathetically but it didn’t faze Axel in the slightest, in fact it made him feel even stronger, the begging of a worthless bug that was scared to be crushed under his heel brought him to a sense of twisted pleasure. The man tried to claw at Axel’s gloved hands which only served to irritate the enraged blonde. He took a knife from his trench coat pocket and slid the sharp blade across the man’s paling cheek, blood bubbled to the surface mixing with the tears pouring from your attacker’s eyes. 

Axel wanted nothing more than to make the man suffer but he knew he had to get this over with, you needed him after all. “Filthy fucking scum.” Axel spat in his native tongue applying as much pressure as possible before he heard the satisfying crack of the man’s neck. The smaller man’s lifeless body crumpled to the floor and Axel finally turned back to where you had been tied up. 

During his vengeful kill his brothers were quick to untie you and gently lay you on the couch, Oscar cut open your shirt followed by a quiet apology to your unconscious form. They were already working the second bullet out by the time Axel was done. 

Axel couldn’t help but feel a wave of guilt crash over him when looking down at you. This was all his fault, he had been so careless and dragged you into a life of danger without a second thought. He felt nauseous as his mind wandered to  what could have happened if they arrived just a few minutes too late. He sat down on the floor beside the couch next to Oscar, you were a sight for sore eyes to put it lightly. Your right eye was slightly swollen and badly bruised, your lip was busted in two different places. Your torso was littered with bruises that were already blooming to the surface, he felt disgusted with himself. 

A hand came down on his shoulder, he didn’t have to look up to know it was Otto attempting to comfort him wordlessly. But even then he felt nothing but wave after wave of guilt crash into him. 

---

When you opened your eyes again you were staring up at the popcorn ceiling of your living room. The smell of blood was still lingering in the air making the room feel weighed down, it was an overwhelming thing you thought you would never have to feel again. Your body was throbbing all over, pain shooting through you with every breath. 

You felt his fingers lace with yours before you saw him, worry knitting Axel’s brows when you shifted your head against the pillow underneath you. Guilt tugged at your heart at his worried state, blood smearing his left cheek. Your thumb wiped at the trying to help rub it away but it was no use. His eyes pooled with all kinds of emotions; worry, happiness, fear, guilt. 

“I’m so sorry.” He muttered, making you freeze. What the hell was he sorry for?  “I should have suspected my work would come back on you.” 

You smiled at him softly, you guessed it made sense why he would blame himself. Sometimes you felt bad for never revealing your previous ‘life style’ especially since you knew he and his brothers wouldn’t judge. It had never come up though, you had taken your leave long before you even met the trio so you never thought it would be important to spring on him. Plus there was a lingering fear and insecurity. What if they did judge you? What if they did think differently of you afterwards? 

“There’s nothing for you to be sorry about Axel.” You moved to sit up which he lightly fussed over but you brushed him off softly, you peered down at yourself to see you were wearing a different shirt. The remains of your other shirt crumbled on the foot of the couch. 

“Hey, so uh… I think it’s actually about time I talk to you guys about something.” The three brothers looked at you curiously and you felt your chest tighten, anxiety pooling around you. You knew that eventually the secret would spill but you never wanted it to be like this, not with a dead man rolled up in a spare bed sheet from your linen closet on your bloodstained carpet, not with the three of them staring at you with so much guilt in their eyes. But you guessed there was no time better than now to finally crack open your most heinous secret. 

“Otto there’s a large cardboard box hidden at the very back of my closet… it’s uh- it’s under some old running shoes. Mind getting it for me?” You couldn’t shake the shame that bit at your nerves, your past was never something you wanted to willingly confront again. After years of finally coming to terms with the things you did to survive, you tried so hard to suppress the monster that was buried so deeply inside of you, leaving your soul permanently stained. 

Otto returned with the box in question, it was decently sized and hidden inside were all the weapons you had used to kill off your ‘assignments’ as your boss would so fondly call them. Guns, knives, and even an assortment of brass knuckles that were kept in a decorative wooden box. But tucked away underneath all of the long since abandoned weapons were the files your employer would provide you with. Inside each of them contained information on each life you took, where to find them, their family information, and even how to kill them if the boss held a specific grudge against the victim. 

The tallest brother kneeled down next to the couch and sat the taunting box beside you. His eyes were soft yet confused which warmed you in the very slightest. You gave him a wary smile before turning yourself just a little, you took a deep breath and finally opened the box with shaky fingers. 

You cleared your throat and your gaze trailed up to Axel’s chest, not exactly able to meet his eyes just yet, “Can you slide the coffee table over here please?” He hesitated for a few seconds before prying his bright blues away from the box and doing as you asked. “Thank you.” The shame was probably noticeable in your tone. You shook it off and started taking out gun after gun, knife after knife before finally enough room was cleared and you were able to pull out the files of your fifty seven victims. They were organized by age, youngest to oldest. You combed through the thin manilla folders for Candy’s, your fingers felt like they could burn just by touching them after so long. 

You plucked it from the pile and opened it, the contents inside would certainly be unsightly for any average person who was not experienced in the field of killing. It contained pictures of before and after Candy was killed by your hands, a single bullet wound piercing her forehead with her hazel eyes still open and staring right at the camera. After you were able to tear your eyes away from the picture you picked up another. It was a picture of Candy standing beside the man who had attacked you, the man who was merely a chilling corpse on your floor at this point. 

“That,” you gestured to the wrapped body on your floor “was her boyfriend Roger Myer. They had been together for three and a half years and she was getting ready to celebrate her birthday the day I broke into her house and killed her.” You paused, sucking in a slow breath before continuing “She didn’t even have time to beg for her life before I put a bullet in her head.” You swallowed after bitterly reminiscing the quick kill. 

All three brothers stared at you in disbelief, never in their years of knowing you would they think you would be anything like them. They had believed you were just an innocent, only to now realize your soul was darkened just like theirs. 

“I uh… I’ve been out of the job for about six years now. When my boss finally died and the rest of his employees fled I was released from my contract and was able to leave all this behind me.” You almost rolled your eyes at how naive you were “Until this guy decided to do his little revenge quest.” You couldn’t exactly blame him for the anger though, anyone would want to do the same thing if the person they loved was murdered for close to no reason. 

“I understand if you guys don’t want anything to do with me anymore. I mean- ugh shit,” You let out a sudden sigh pinching the bridge of your nose, ignoring the pain that shot through your face, trying to find the right words “I know that you three would understand since you’re exactly what I was. But I shouldn’t have kept this from you and I understand if you need me to back off for a little while.” Your eyes stung and your throat tightened slightly before you spoke again “I was just so scared you would think differently of me if I told you about what I used to be.” 

You felt the couch dip beside you but you were too scared to look up from the dry blood caking your hands. A leather clad hand came to clutch your shaking fingers, the gesture was gentle and reassuring. The tears slowly trickled down your cheeks, marking a pathway for one after another to follow. Axel’s other hand came up to your chin to tilt your head up gently, his eyes were soft and caring. He understood your fear because he had once felt it too when he first whispered his deepest secret into the shadows of an early winter morning two years ago. He sympathized with you. 

“You have nothing to be sorry for, älskling.” His voice washed over you, finally willing you to relax against his soft touches “We are the same.” Your breath hitched in your throat and you couldn’t help but look up at his brothers to gauge their reactions as well. 

Oscar had the simplest hints of a smirk on his lips which was far from unusual. He was holding one of your most prized guns making you give a watery chuckle. Of course he would be drawn to the weapons so carefully laid out side by side, you couldn’t say you were surprised. 

Beside him Otto had his hands tucked away in his pants pockets “You are our family, we hold no judgement when it comes to one’s past. It would be pretty hypocritical of us after all.” He grinned down at you. The room felt ten times lighter, it was no longer spinning with your anxieties taunting you. You looked back to Axel who’s expression was still soft yet neutral at the same time.

Sometimes the past had a way of catching up with you, your sins choking you until you could no longer breathe. There was no escaping what you had done but that didn’t mean you had to hide from it anymore, your secrets were out in the open now. Even though a part of you still shook in fear you couldn’t find it in yourself to care in that moment. You were finally allowing yourself to fully heal from the scars that were so deeply embedded inside your soul. It was even more reassuring to know you wouldn’t have to do it alone anymore. 

---

2006, 17 year olds

Klaus Hargreeves was surely unsure of how to handle Y/n, especially in the state of a man who's high out of his mind on pills he found on the streets. He wasn't in a place where he could adequately comfort someone, but Klaus had to for Y/n, or he feared no one else would.  Klaus had spent much of his life running away from things that scared him, including such intimacy as this.

He had spent most of his life up until this point chasing after happiness. He found his solace in drugs, and for one day in his life, he was going to stop- just for Y/n. Y/n had been stuck invisible for a week. He hadn't exactly seen them in that whole time. Once or twice for an attempted dinner with the family, then back to their room they went. For sulking purposes, he figured.

There was only one other time that he could remember Y/n like this, almost two years ago when Ben had died. Except it was more flickering back and forth than staying stagnant. In Klaus' mind, it was now his duty to figure out why Y/n was upset, and how to change them back.

He crept along the vast hallways, practically tripping on his own two feet. The house was black, and even the moon could not give it light tonight. Everyone had been sent to bed early, as there was one less mouth to feed at dinner, it went by quicker. Of course, there was the oddball question from Diego, and in response, a concerned yet agreeable nod from Luther. Even Grace was worried about Y/n's absence. When Ben had died, they had never disappeared- and if they did, never for this long.

Klaus eventually finds his way to their door. It was the only room in the house without the light on(beside's his, of course). It was remarkable he had ever found it. He thought, perhaps, that one of the thousand times he had gone there, that he had memorized the way. He waved it off as silly, marking it as more luck than anything else.

He knocks gently at their door. As he expected, they do not answer. Though what worries Klaus, is he can't hear any noise behind the door. No sniffling, no crying, only quiet. He can feel his heartbeat slow, as he twists the doorknob. He's met with the same darkness as the rest of the house.

Sighing, he lays himself on their bed. He stares at the ceiling, wringing his hands to ease the evergrowing knot in his stomach. A whistling sigh rouses him from his coming sleep. "I'm sorry," they murmur.

"I know," Klaus admits, "but it's not your fault."

"But I'm also seventeen, and I barely know how to control these damn things."

"I can't either."

"Yeah, well, maybe if you weren't so stoned all the time, you'd be able to do it." Y/n puffs out. The two sit quietly. Y/n finally twists to view Klaus, his eyes are glazed over, but not red. He's trying, they think, and they're at it again. "Y'know, I didn't mean it." They turn back again, glancing behind them now and again. "Well, partially. I didn't mean it a hundred percent."

"No, no, I need to get my act together." They don't respond this time, believing the best option was not to aggravate Klaus but try to be there for him. For once. "I-I will," he whines.

"I know," Y/n begins, voice wavering, "I know."

They way they talk has Klaus feeling ashamed for them, he must be such an awful brother.

"Klaus, I know you're going through so much, but we all are, and I won't always be here to get you through. Past few weeks have been a good example of that. I'm fucked up, too. I can barely get through my own shit, and I don't want to lead you down my path."

Klaus jolts up, shifting to face you, his brows furrow, his lips quiver, and he looks teary-eyed.

"Please don't say anything, Klaus. You're upset, too, I get that. I only want to sit in silence a little longer."

"Okay," he whimpers out. Klaus knew he had failed his mission as a brother and a friend. They were pushing him away again. He was going to leave at the end of the year, and he couldn't even have this one small victory. He eventually left the room, staying outside, waiting by their door just in case. He could hear soft crying for a while, but they stopped, and he went back to his room.