#tspud comic

[stand. look at skip button. do not move]

[wait]

[wait]

[wait]

You know, Stanley, it’s kind of funny, how empty this all seems without you.

It shouldn’t matter, whether you’re here to listen to me prattle on. (And I will admit, here, where you can’t hear me, that I do perhaps get away from myself on occasion.)

It shouldn’t matter. It’s not like you can talk, not like you can do ANYTHING but endlessly defy me, endlessly do you very best to RUIN the story I work so hard on, spill my blood and sweat and tears into, and-!

Maybe that doesn’t matter, in the end.

After all, you’re at their mercy too, aren’t you? 

You’re not any more real than I am.

I can only say the things I’m told to say, FEEL the things I’m told to feel-

Just as you can only move when you ARE moved.

Just as you can only choose what is chosen through you.

We’re the same.

Even now, this is only someone else’s opinion on what I should think.

Someone else writing these words, using my voice as a vehicle for their own thoughts.

They aren’t even trying to hide it.

…How pathetic is that? That they don’t even need to pretend that this is anything more than their own- their own sick FANTASY of me- of US.

Because they know full well I’m utterly powerless to stop them.

And you? You’re not even here.

I’m all alone and there’s nobody to hear me scream.

[disagree]

Wh- how long have you been there?!

[shrug]

You don’t- how can you not KNOW?

What does that even- did the author not DECIDE on it? Is that how worthless we are to them, Stanley? They didn’t even bother to figure out at which moment you started listening in on my (VERY PRIVATE) monologue about the tragedy of my nature as a fictional being-

[hold out arms]

HEY! I was speaking! God, you’re so rude, it’s a wonder anyone wants to play as you.

What are you even doing? Shrugging again? Interpretive dance? Offering me a-

No. No way. You can not POSSIBLY be attempting to- to HUG me, of all things. It’s simply too absurd to contemplate.

[hold out arms]

Oh, for the love of- at least have the basic courtesy of redoing the gesture. That is just copy-pasted, how lazy can you BE?

This is ridiculous. RIDICULOUS, you hear me? I’m a disembodied voice, I don’t even have arms. You’re absurd.

What are you even trying to accomplish here? Are you trying to comfort me? “OoOoh, iT’s fiNe ThAt wE hAVe nO FrEE wiLl, i’lL HUG THE PROBLEM AWAY.”

You’re such a twat.

[hold out arms]

[wait]

You’re making fun of me, aren’t you. At least use italics or something.

You’re the worst. This isn’t even a good story, practically the entire thing is dialogue.

The formatting isn’t even good.

[wait]

Fine. Whatever. I’ll “hug” you.

You suck. I was going to give you a bucket, but I’ve reconsidered. I don’t think you DESERVE a bucket.

[wait]

[wait]

[tap foot]