summary: the little mermaid gone wrong. well, maybe not so much.
a/n: Ah yes I finally finished this writing this fic! i started this so long ago but really got stuck onĀ this part and finally got inspiration to finish it:) This was supposed to go up on Christmas day as a present for all but I was very busy! Thank you to all who supported this fromĀ the beginning!Ā
There was very few things Safiya was sure of. Number one: Empress Vaness most definitely did not enjoy her jokes. Number two: Merik Nihar, the handsome bastard, was avoiding her and she had no idea why. Number three: Iseult was definitely going to cut her into pieces of human fillet when she comes back from her oh so romantic boat ride with her bloodthirsty cutie. But currently, she feels like the threat of being brutally murdered by her sister is no where near the pain she feels from her handsome bastard ignoring her. And goddamn it, her name isnāt Safiya fon Hasstrel if she doesnāt find out why.Ā
As Safi alternated between taking down the godforsaken streamers handing from the trees surrounding the lagoon and sneaking looks at Merik, she thought about how much he changed. He was more reserved, quiet around her. He didnāt even give her a smile when she did her little antics. And god, did she try to get him to talk to her. Every day, she would go to Iseult with an elaborate plan to get him to notice her. And everyday, she would return to her bed, in the verge of tears. And then there was his more obvious difference. Scars were carved into his skin and god, all she could think about was how much pain he went through for her. She canāt help but flinch when she sees them because she remembers that she is the cause of the pain he had to go through. Thatās probably why he isnāt talking to her. Maybe heās angry for ruining his body, his life. This was her fault and, this was the one thing she didnāt know how to fix.
But then every once in a while, she could see his old self somewhere deep in him, fighting to be seen. She can feel it when his gaze lingers on her. She can feel it when he follows her moves when he thinks sheās not aware. And the one time, she caught him and fell into the trap of his gorgeous eyes, she could feel it reaching out to her. She saw so much pain and sadness in his eyes, so much that she doesnāt know how to make it up to him. She doesnāt know what to do to get him back to her. So she continues on, throwing herself into her work, throwing herself into figuring out where she fits into this elaborate scheme.Ā
Speaking of elaborate schemes, you really outdid yourself this time she gave herself a mental pat on the back, smirking as she imagined her threadsisterās face when she saw her beloved bloodwitch sitting across from her. Out of all her elaborate schemes, this one was her best work. Did Iseult really think that she wouldnāt see through her blatant lies when she told her that Aeduan meant nothing to him? Did she really think she wouldnāt see the literal heart eyes emanating from Aeduan when Iseult was around? Did she really think that she couldnāt see the fleeting looks the cast on each other or the secret smiles they share?
When she first found Iseult was working with him, she must admit, she overreacted just a tad. And by a tad she means hitting Iseult repeatedly in the face while yelling at her for making a stupid decision. She was going to walk over to that brooding mess and smack the truth out of him. And then she calmed down and noticed. Noticed Aeduanās eyes light up when Iseult walks in. Noticed the heated eye contact they would share, almost like they were having a telepathic conversation. And how Aeduan can read the minor changes in her face, something that was hard to do if you didnāt know her. She, of course, took measures in making sure he wasnāt going to hurt her, making sure that he was truthful to her. The said measures may or may not have included tying him to a chair, flashing a light into his eyes while literally grilling him, but Iseult doesnāt need to know about that.
As her feet danced on the slippery, moss covered rocks as she continued to clean, her mind wandered away, making sure to push the thoughts of Merik deep down into her heart where she couldnāt reach. Goddamn these streamers. Damn them to the deepest circle of hell. Almost done, you only have a couple more to take down and youāre done. She assured herself this multiple times but of course the thrice damned streamers would not come down without a fight. The last piece was tied onto a branch covered in moss making it almost impossible for her to get a grip.Ā
Almost⦠almost there Safi.. if you could just reach a bit higher... She swipes up to try and catch the end, like a cat swiping at a thread hanging from above it. One more leap, just one more and youāll catch it. She leaps up once more, not only failing to catch the streamers but also failing to fall back on to solid ground.Ā
Water flies everywhere as her body hits the ice cold water. Her dress balloons up a bit and weighs her down slightly as she struggles in the water, the air almost knocked out of her. Her hair is mangled everywhere and panic fills her chest, her lungs as she opens her eyes and it stings as all she can see is blurriness so she shuts them as tight as she can, her eyes burning. Her arms flail is a panicked attempt to get to the surface, to get some air. air. She doesnāt have enough air, she canāt breathe, she needs air, air, air. All of a sudden strong arms her lifting her up, up, up until her head breaks the surface. She gasps in air and chokes out water thatās clogging her up from breathing, while shuddering from the cold water, trying to get closer to the source of the arms to steal off the heat. Her breathing is labored as she finally opens her eyes, struggling to focus for a moment,Ā to be greeted with his face. His face, itās.. so close. Itās so close that she could feel his breath on her face and his chest moving as he catches his breath. Heās so close that she can see the scars that line his face, a painful reminder. Itās so close that she could see the panic, the fear in his eyes. Sheās so close, and she doesnāt know what to do, what to say, so she doesnāt. She stays like that, in his arms, drenched in water, with hair flying everywhere. He draws her closer, just the slightest, and sheās just as breathless as before.
He mistakes her breathlessness for panic as he whispers to her to āBreathe. Just breathe. I need you to breathe for me. Look into my eyes and breathe. Youāre okay, youāre in my arms, just breathe.āHis face moves closer and thatās it, thatās all she needs to lose her breath again. Thatās all she needs for her to get lost in his eyes, his scent, his warmth.Heās her protection, her home, where she feels right and like herself. He is the one place where she can go to forget her problems and just feel safe again, like when she was little. Heās Merik Nihar, and sheās in love with him, his eyes, his actions. Iām in love with him Her mind reels with this realization and she lifts her hands, cold, wet and pruney, and places it on his face, cupping it.Ā
āWhy? Why do you avoid me like this? Why do you look at me and flinch? Why do you push me away only to come and save me like this? Look into my eyes, Merik and tell me, pleaseā she begs him, her voice, a quiet whisper as her body quivers within his embrace. His face crumbles as he holds her tighter, and she looks to him as his eyes plunge into despair.Ā
āItās becauseā¦,ā he starts, taking a breath in, āItās because when I look at you all I can think about is how much i love you, how much i want you to be mine, how much i want you to be next to me. But i canāt do any of this, because you deserve better Safiya. You deserve a man who can love you and take care of you better than I can. I am too broken, too scared. You deserve better than this, better than what I can offer to you. So I avoided your eyes, avoided your advances because when I look at you it scares me. It scares me how much I love you and how much I want to protect you.ā He lets a deep breath out and looks at her with so much emotion in his eyes that she canāt process. Itās all too much, everything heās saying is too much. It canāt be true⦠he.. he loves me. he loves me. It repeats through her mind like a chant, each time growing with more intensity and she feels like sheās underwater again. Her chest is brining with thought and she feels ready to burst. There is so much she wants to say, so much she wants to do, but she canāt. So she does what sheās wanted to do since the moment she say him again. Safiya leans in, water sloshing around her, and kisses him.
And thatās all it takes for both of them to unravel, as he drags her closer into him and there is virtually no space between them. Her arms wrap around his neck, and they deepen the kiss and itās a blissful moment, as everything is set right again. Itās like they are the only ones there in this moment, that all their problems, their worries have been tossed aside. They fit perfectly together and as they pull apart, all she can think is damn, Iāve never been more thankful to those streamers.Ā
a/n: uh yeah i suck at writing intimate scenes, iāll try to get better at them. Also to write that water scene i literally wanted to dunk my head in water to see how it feels and write it. I honestly donātĀ understand how writers can do it!
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