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Day 30 (second-to-last day!) of Mogeko March 2025, the prompt of the day was "time" and originally wanted to write something, but i didn't have the time or the inspiration to do it, but i did want to keep the theme, which was of Wadanohara's and Samekichi reunion in the true ending, so here it is (also i kinda suck at drawing hugs, but i still hope you like the drawing).
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Dia 30 (penultimo dia!) del Mogeko March 2025, la tematica del dia era "tiempo" y original mente queria escribir algo, pero no tenia el tiempo la inspiracion para hacerlo, pero si queria mantener la tematica, que era de la reunion entre Wadanohara y Samekichi en el final verdadero, asi que aqui esta (y tambien apesto dibujando abrazos, pero espero que todavia les guste el dibujo).
A postgame Omori epilogue exploring the way each member of the gang would cope after learning the truth. This time, Kel takes the wheel.
After Sunny gets into his mom’s car and leaves Faraway for good, Kel sits on his porch and Doesn’t Think About Anything.
It isn’t easy. Kel just had one of the craziest nights of his life. Everything Sunny said in that hospital room is bouncing around in his brain like one of those DVD screensavers. Except instead of a tacky color-changing logo, it's the worst thing he ever heard.
Luckily, Kel is very good at this game. He kicks off his shoes and digs his toes into the dirt. He plucks blades of grass and shreds them into spindly little threads. The bloody wreckage of Sunny's eye keeps surfacing in his mind, but it's way more fun to think about what he could IM Sunny about, now that Sunny has AIM. It’s even nicer to remember how tight Sunny hugged him before he left.
…Man. It's dumb, ‘cause it’s not like he didn’t already, but. Kel is really gonna miss that guy.
The sun climbs higher in the sky. The clouds scud by in no particular hurry. By the time the cool of morning heats to day, Kel is feeling sort of normal, actually.
So, of course, that’s when Aubrey shows up.
“Sunny,” she spits.
Kel does a double-take. “Wh— Huh?? Where???”
“No, you fucking moron, I’m asking. Where the fuck is Sunny.”
Right. Classic Aubrey. Skipping straight to ‘physical violence’ is an insane first resort, but it’s par for the course, for Aubrey. When Aubrey feels bad, she can’t just hide it, like Hero, or swallow it, like Basil, or—freaking—think about literally anything else, like Kel. Aubrey would rather forge her hurt into a warhammer and swing it at anyone dumb enough to get close.
They’ve had this fight a million times already. At this point, Kel could do it in his sleep.
Even after all this time, he can’t help letting Aubrey piss him off. But he does manage to bail out before she can break all his bones with her nail bat, so. That’s probably personal growth.
Kel gets all pissed off and stomps off and then stops being pissed off, because he hates being pissed off. He’s always hated feeling angry. It feels like poison in his blood. He doesn’t get how so many people can do it so much of the time. Why would you choose to feel bad when instead you could just… look at something else?
###
On his way inside, Kel blunders right into Hero.
“O-Oh! Sorry, bro!”
“All good,” Hero says automatically. Reflexive. His eyes are rimmed with red, but he obviously doesn’t plan on talking about it. “You okay?”
Kel has to stop himself from rolling his eyes. Clearly, Hero is taking the news way, way, way worse than anyone. (Including Aubrey, who is currently, actively committing property damage about it). But of course he’d rather die than say so.
“Totally,” Kel reassures him. “All good.”
###
It was the same when they were kids.
Oh, Hero acts like he never gets mad. He acts like he’s too grown-up for that kind of thing. He’s even pretty good at it. He’s got Aubrey fooled, and Sunny. And obviously their parents (not that that one was much of a challenge. Mamá and Dad would believe anything if Hero was the one who said it).
But Hero could never fool Mari. Mari was sharp, like Sunny. Perceptive enough to smell the lies on your breath. If you were hiding something, she could always draw it out of you. She’d soften Hero up with teasing and flattery and then hit him in his weak spot at the exact right moment, the perfect jab at the perfect angle to split him open like a fish. The good cop and the bad cop, all in one.
Kel used to hear them sometimes. Once in a blue moon, when Hero and Mari were sure that no one was listening, they would even let their hair down a little. Take off their disguises and let themselves be less-than-perfect for a change. Sometimes it was Hero who was crying, and sometimes it was Mari. Sometimes both of them at once!
But most of the time, they weren’t crying. They were pissed.
Like in fourth grade, after Kel’s practice got rained out. Kel was soaking wet and past exhausted. All he wanted was to lie down and close his eyes and not even think about the stupid math test that he definitely flunked this morning.
He was already reaching for the door when he heard the voices: pitched low and stretched taut, like a rubber band about to break.
“—even matter!!” Hero was whispering. “If I’m too busy, it’s my fault for not helping; but if I do tutor him—instead of studying for my own finals!! By the way!! Which I really need to be doing!!!”
“I’m familiar with the concept,” Mari said drily.
“—then it’s still my fault for—what? Not helping well enough? I mean, what??? What do they expect me to do? Freaking… crawl inside his head and make him smarter?”
Mari snickered. “You could hide a walkie-talkie in his hat. Like that Spongebob episode where he goes to driver’s ed.”
Hero huffed a tired laugh. “I just don’t get what they expect me to do. I’m not the one who still can’t do long division in fourth grade.”
Kel froze with his hand on the doorknob. Okay. Yeah. He wasn’t sure for a second, but—yeah. They were definitely talking about him.
Some people would probably pick a fight about it. Some people (cough, cough, Aubrey) would storm in guns a-blazing. And where would that get her? All the mean stuff she heard would still be in her head. Nothing would change, except that everyone would know that everyone knew that everything was worse than it looked. Kel didn’t want any part in it.
He backed away from the door. He backed all the way down the hall, and halfway down the stairs. Then—louder this time—he stomped up the steps and burst through the door to their room.
“Oh!” Hero looked very briefly panicked. “H-Hey, little bro! Short practice today?”
“Uh huh! We got rained out! But look!!!” Kel bared his teeth, showing off the ragged hole where his canine used to be.
Hero turned faintly green.
“Grooossss!” Mari giggled. “Did you twist it out yourself?”
“Uh huh!”
She ruffled his hair. “You’re so cool, Kel. Don’t ever change, okay?”
Kel grinned up at her, gap-toothed and beaming. “You got it!!”
###
But everyone changes.
###
Kel opens his eyes in Basil’s room.
It’s not how he remembers. Basil’s room used to be wall-to-wall leaves and vines and memories. Now it’s vacant. No photos. No sticky note reminders. None of Sunny's sketches on the walls. Just white paint and beige carpet and a pool of inky dark, slowly swallowing the floor.
In real life, Kel wasn’t here for this part. He had to hear about it from Aubrey while they huddled outside the ICU, clutching each other’s hands hard enough to cut off the circulation and taking turns telling each other that it was going to be okay. But Kel’s brain must not know that. Because this time, he can see everything.
Basil kneels over Sunny’s chest. Sunny’s face is eyeless mush. A mangle of ground meat.
There’s a blur of motion as Hero tackles Basil against the wall.
“Kel!” he bellows. He kicks the shears across the floor. “Kelsey! Now!!”
Oh. This is where he comes in.
Kel jerks around to stare at Hero, who’s got Basil pinned by the throat. “Wh–What?”
“Hold him!!”
“Huh???” Basil isn’t even struggling. He's just dangling there. Bleeding.
“NOW!!”
On his way across the room, Kel almost trips over something on the floor. A body. Sunny’s. But Sunny was sleeping in the living room. Why would Sunny be on Basil’s floor?
Kel looks closer.
Sunny’s face is red. Sunny’s hair is slicked flat and his face is all red, only red without any eyes at all. His face is torn red and he’s—moving. He’s moving. He’s awake. He’s bleeding out and he can feel it happen because he’s still awake.
Sunny looks at Kel without any eyes. Red sputters through his teeth. “Khrrrh—”
###
Kel wakes up gasping. Scrambles for his phone before he remembers that he doesn’t have Sunny's number. Does Sunny even have a phone? Would Kel even know if he did?
He stumbles downstairs to the family desktop. Sunny’s online. Big surprise. Sunny is always online, and never answers.
Kel is so freaked out, he almost types, ‘Hey, are you okay?’
‘Hey, Sunny! Sorry, I don’t want to stress you out, but I’m really scared. I’m really scared for you Sunny. I can’t stop feeling like something bad is going to happen. I can’t stop dreaming that something bad is going to happen. But they don’t feel like nightmares. They feel like visions. Premonitions.’
‘Hi Sunny. Long time no see, haha. Hey, weird question: are you okay? Are you hurt? Please tell me if you’re hurting but please please PLEASE don’t lie. Sometimes I get so scared you’re going to die. Are you going to die? You have to tell me if you’re—’
Kel doesn’t type any of that stuff.
He types, snnyyyy! u up? lol
He types, cant sleep haha
He types, wanna sneak out 2 hobbeez? ;) ;) ;)
Sunny doesn’t answer. Because he lives three hours away, and because he never answers. Whatever it is that Sunny wants, it’s obviously not to go to fucking Hobbeez.
Kel types, misss u bro. gna try 2 sleep. wishme luck :/
###
When he pads downstairs, he’s met with the hissing crackle of frying eggs.
“Mo~rning!” his mom sings out. “Thought I’d make breakfast, since it’s your brother’s last day!”
Right. Hero heads back to college tomorrow. Kel knew that. “Heck yeah! Can I help?”
“Vaya, vaya! I don’t need any more mess! Oh, and your friend got home from the hospital. You should go say hi! I’m sure he’d appreciate it.”
“My—” Kel sputters, before he remembers that she couldn’t possibly be talking about Sunny. Sunny lives three hours away. “Who??”
“The little blanquito. Que siempre parece como conejito mojado.”
Well, that’s definitely not Sunny. Which means that, by ‘hospital,’ Mamá meant ‘psych ward.’ Specifically, the wing for kids who tried to murder their best friend.
Kel’s eyes unfocus a little. The last time he saw Basil, it was—
(—pinned to the wall with Hero's elbow pressed into his throat. Beads of red dripping from his fingers. Even later, blanched and bloodless on the gurney, Kel could still see the blood crusted under his—
Basil wasn’t even very badly hurt, after. It looked a lot worse than it was, but that’s just ‘cause all his wounds were on his face. It’s not like Sunny’d had any way to defend himself. Just his own two hands. At worst, the marks might have got infected from all the grime under Sunny’s unwashed nails.)
“You should go see him!” Mamá says encouragingly. “I’m sure he’d be glad to see a friend.”
…Right. That’s what Kel is. A friend.
###
Basil really is back. He’s coming to school and everything. It’s—weird.
Not bad. It’s not bad. It’s just that talking to Basil is— Um. It’s sort of like playing a videogame about talking to Basil. Like Kel is watching himself from outside-in.
It was the same after Mari. Kel couldn’t wrap his head around why she did it. He couldn’t even stand to think about why she did it. So, he didn’t. He spent months on autopilot. Controlling his body remotely, like a mech pilot or something. ‘Press A to get out of bed.’ ‘Press B to put on your clothes.’ ‘Press X to bring your brother another meal that you both know he isn’t going to eat.’
“K-Kel?” Basil says again.
“Haha, sorry! Guess I spaced out for a second. I just wanted to say that it’s, uh. You know. It’s good to have you back! And if you ever need anything—someone to talk to, or to back you up if someone’s messing with you, or whatever—just, like, let me know.”
Basil doesn’t look up. He just keeps fidgeting with his fingernails, chewing a scab on his lip that’s already started to bleed. He obviously isn’t convinced.
“Hey, c’mon!” Kel whacks him on the arm, making Basil flinch. “You know we’ve got your back. If anyone gives you a hard time, you tell them to talk to me.”
If anything, Basil looks even less convinced. “...R-Right. Um. Thank you. I’ll… do that.”
Kel has to stop himself from scowling. He’s aware that he’s fucking this up. He just doesn’t understand why.
For a few years there, Kel was pretty sure that he was a good friend, at least. If nothing else. Now it turns out he couldn’t even get that right. In the end, it’s like everything else. No matter how hard he tries, it never seems to be enough.
What is it about friendship that he isn’t getting? Isn’t being friends just, like… hanging out, and going on adventures, and having a good time and stuff? Why is everyone so determined to make it into this big exhausting thing?
###
Kel is hanging out on Sunny’s porch again. Though technically it isn’t Sunny’s porch anymore. The For Sale sign is gone, so the sale must have gone through. But no one’s actually moved in yet, so. Not like there’s anyone to kick him out.
Kel isn’t moping, if that’s what you think. Being here is just a habit. Somewhere he goes to be alone. If anyone saw him here, they’d feel too awkward to approach.
…With one obvious exception.
Aubrey stalks across the lawn with her bat slung over one shoulder. The storm brewing in the air frizzes her hair to angry spikes. As usual, she doesn’t mince words.
“Are you seriously still doing this?”
Kel buries his face in his hands. “Why are you still so mad at me?”
“Why do you think?”
Thunder rolls. Lightning rends the sky, a violent gash in the dark.
“I don’t know!!” Kel shouts, too-loud in the ensuing quiet. “That’s why I’m asking!!”
Just for a second, Aubrey’s bat lowers. “...Are you actually fucking stupid? You totally iced me out. For years. In the worst time of my life.”
“I already apologized for that!!”
“I don’t care,” Aubrey snarls. Her goodwill has officially run out. “That doesn’t do anything! I’m not gonna get any less mad until you make it make sense!!”
Kel grimaces. “It’s— It was just…”
…It’s just that she was being so awful. At home, Kel was swallowed up by the black hole of Hero’s grief. And the second he clawed his way out into the light, there was Aubrey, choking, totally coming apart. Kel just wanted to feel okay for two seconds. Was that really so much to ask?
Wasn’t it bad enough that Mari was gone? Wasn’t it enough that Sunny left with her? There were plenty of times when Kel couldn’t get away from it. When he had to lock himself in the shower to keep from breaking down. But did it really have to be all the time? Always? For every second of every day?
Kel couldn’t even laugh at a joke without feeling like a jerk. Like feeling okay for a second was an insult. (Not to Mari, obviously. Mari was like Kel: she found the fun in every moment. Mari would be thrilled to see him whoop after landing a free throw, or laugh because a butterfly landed on his juice-stained shirt. And she’d hate how Hero and Aubrey were acting. So why was Kel the only one who was wrong?)
“I gotta go,” he mutters, jerking to his feet.
Aubrey barks a cold laugh. “Yeah. That’s what I thought.”
You can read Kel's chapter here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/43929270/chapters/123048562
Or start from the beginning: https://archiveofourown.org/works/43929270/chapters/110454879
This What If Tear jerker was brought to you but the wondering of if.... What If Ingall had been chosen as his Goddess's Vessel~
Enjoy
(Under the cut to save your feed haha)
Kit stared numbly into her dresser mirror, watching tears track steadily down her cheeks feeling detached from her body. The house was silent; the children were staying with her kin at her request. They had all tried to act as though everything was normal… but it had been anything but since her mate had been called to be a vessel for his people’s goddess.
It had been a complete shock as they thought his wish that had caused him to become a kitsune had severed all chances of that happening… but his former goddess’s will was to strong. They had thought… hoped… he had managed to keep himself even with the change. And he had… somewhat. It was Ingall…. But also not…
She thought they could pull through it. He just needed to adjust. They needed to adjust. But it wasn’t right. His words. His actions. It wasn’t her love. But the final nail in the coffin had happened today. She had kissed him on the lips and felt nothing.
Her tears flowed quicker as she remembered herself desperately clutching at his face and pressing kiss after kiss against him trying to feel something. Anything. And she still felt nothing.
It was fortunate that Ginko had been there. The silver kitsune had been staying close since it had happened. She knew Kit would need support with her mate… injured. She sensed the snap she’d been anticipating coming and she quickly and cheerfully declared a sleep over at her new home and ushered all the children out before they could see.
Kit closed her eyes with her head bowed as pain washed over her as she remembered the conversation they’d had.
“I-I mean are you even still in there? Really in there Charmer?” her hands cradled his face still looking into his face for a shred of hope. “I love you with every piece of me Ingall, do you still love me at all? Because… I can’t feel it if you do.”
His once familiar face crinkled in confusion “Love? Love is fleeting as the lives of mortals. There is no need for it. Surely pleasure is more than enough.” And it was then she knew, really knew, her mate was gone. Really and truly gone.
“Love is everything.” She whispered brokenly filling her heart fracture in her chest. Her hands moved from his face with mixture of anguish and anger at what had been taken from her and settled on his chest before pushing him back and into a portal that she opened quickly to his home world. “And it’s not here anymore.” She finished resolutely staring him in the eyes, oh how she missed his eyes “My children have lost one parent… they can’t afford to lose us both. If you stay, they will…” Before he could react she shut the portal and sat at her dresser.
Opening her eyes to stare at her reflection, Kit flinched as the movement made her hair brush against her neck like his fingers once did. A pair of sewing scissors caught her eye and in a fit of anger she snatched them up and sliced off the offending strands, grabbing handful after handful hacking away at her long hair. Barely even flinching when one frantic cut nicked one of her long ears not stopping until her hair was barely inches from her scalp. She stared at her reflection and did not recognize herself. Good… now the outside matched the inside.
Her eyes drifted around the room, her home. There were traces of him everywhere. She could see and smell him on everything. There but not.
No.
The others saw the plumes of smoke and flames from the distance. They found Kit tucked up against the stone chest of her mother watching her house and nearby tree burn to the ground. The children’s possessions were stacked neatly in the lawn as well as her family portrait, otherwise nothing of hers remained. Just like her love. It was all gone.
~~~
He watched in horror as the light died in his mate’s gaze, watched her heart shatter. She was so close, but he couldn't reach her. He was an unwilling captive within his own Soul.
“Let me out!” He roared straining against the binds, “she needs me. My mate needs me. You,” Ingall spat the word out like poison, “do not!”
The Goddess, for he would never address her as ‘The Great Mother’ again, chuckled. As she strolled his body through the Forest of his youth, heading straight for the heart.
“No, child. I need you, and you are mine to command.”
“I will fight you until the end of time itself,” he snarled, “I will wish you from existence! The worlds be damned, you will not win!”
“You can try, dear child, you can try.”
The smile on her face didn’t reach her heart as she watched her children play. Weeks had passed since the house burned. There had been many tears that night. Not just the loss of their home but in the knowledge that they’d never see their father again. Byakko in particular had been inconsolable for days.
It had taken a lot of hard work both on their new home and themselves to regain some semblance of normalcy. Kit worked very hard on it and them. She thanked her lucky stars for Kuko and Ginko and their unwavering support even with their own new ward. The skeleton brothers helped things where they could as well, especially with the kids.
It was hard, hard work. But she did it. She managed to not completely fall apart and give her children the love and support they deserved even as she fought the urge to crumple to the ground every day, to succumb to the pain and let her Soul totally shatter to end the agony of losing her mate. It was like acid flowing in her veins. Like being thrown in a icy river and drowning as what felt like hundreds of thousands of needles pierced her over and over.
By day she managed to function as normal, smiling and loving best she could. Nights were either spent tossing and turning in the unfamiliar bed she’d had made, thoughts cycling over and over on her loss or in a restless sleep with dreams plaguing her. Dreams of him and of inevitably losing him again and again. To be frank she hated the dreams the most, she could at least eventually force her thoughts elsewhere when she was awake, when she slept it was next to impossible.
When a portal opened and he walked though Kit felt the wind leave her as a vice gripped around her battered heart. The face she loved changed into the one that haunted her most stared back at her. The face of the one that took her mate from her. She took a step back as he took a step forward, the others around them freezing in shock“No… no you can’t be here.” Kit moaned with a grimace her ears going flat on her shortened hair as she bared her teeth at him. “Go away!” She lunged at him about to strike when her eyes met his sorrow filled ones… ones showing far more emotion than this new face ever had. They were his eyes.
Kit gasped and staggered back sharply “No! It’s not possible.” She didn’t dare believe it for a moment. She couldn’t risk that hope. Worse than the hope even if it was, that meant she cast away her mate when he had needed her most…
The pained vixen shook her head “It’s not real… just a dream.” A loud slap rang out as she struck her cheek harshly “Wake up! Wake up!” Kit hit herself even harder “Wake up now!”
He was tired, so very tired.
But he was alive.
He was himself, and that was enough.
The elf paused in his foolhardy escape from the healing chambers, resting heavily on the staff Trahan had crafted for him. Deukalion would kill him if he caught him, but he couldn’t keep Kit waiting any longer, consequences be damned. Taking a deep breath, he carried on, eyes straying to his hand. He grimaced at the sight of it. Tamashii and his brothers definitely pulled off the bony look better.
It had been weeks of agony as he’d watched the goddess parade around in his body. She had been fond of his looks, spending nauseating hours each morning and night admiring every inch of his flesh. It had given him a wicked sense of glee when one morning he found by some miracle. He personally believed it was remnants of the Hearts magic. He had some control of himself once again. Not much, but more than enough to enact what he had been wishing for weeks.
His body rejected every moral of food the goddess consumed, and divinity could only do so much for a mortal body, and the lack of nutrients slowly but surely began to show. Ingall took sick delight in the goddess's disgust. She likely would have been inhabiting a corpse before too long if Trahan and Ruby hadn’t found them staggering along the forest's edge. The goddess hadn’t noticed the pair. She’d been too focused on raging at Ingall as he laughed madly. Perhaps he had gone truly mad. Then, all of a sudden, she was quiet, and he was himself again. Without the goddess's strength, he crumbled and would have been a heap of skin, bones, and matted hair on the forest floor if familiar arms hadn’t caught him.
“What happened to you?” Trahan asked, aghast. Ruby was quiet, focusing her null magic on keeping the goddess contained. Ingall found himself too weak to speak to his friends, but tears of relief and joy spilt from his eyes, and he rested his head on the other man’s chest.
They had spirited him away to the Northern Island. It had been a long, painful process. Aureila went so far as to break laws never meant to be broken, but she had been horrified by his state by what the elven goddess had done. Ingall hadn’t been a willing vessel. No, the goddess had stolen his body by force once she’d used his mother’s up. Between the four of them, they somehow managed to pull the goddess from him. Even with their combined strengths, she’d fought tooth and nail the whole way. Shouting curses that shook the isle.
“You have changed. You are no longer a sister of mine,” Aureila rebuked her, “Your cruelty and callousness match the one who gave that dark scourge his power. By my right as an Elder, I henceforth strip you of your power and claim your creations as my own.” The Avarain Goddess’ voice thundered with power, near overwhelming for the mortal around her.
Ingall remembered, laughing; it was terribly rude to do so after such a sentencing, but he hadn’t cared at the time, and Aurelia’s eyes were only filled with pity as they met his. The Goddess of the Lights and Winds then imprisoned the Elven goddess in a crystal wrapped in her power. It vanished in a flash, “there it is done”, she looked at Ingall once again, “My crystals will grow among the eldest trees in your forest, proclaiming my new claim on your people.”
“We welcome you, Mother,” he replied weakly before the world had gone dark, and he heard the panicked voices of his friends and his new Mother. He woke again to an odd feeling in his chest.
“Your Soul was too weak with that goddess gone. Aureila blessed you with a Spirit, but it is still small and new. Much like a babe,” he recalled Deukalion explaining, “You must let yourself recover and grow stronger before you return home; even the magic of the portal could snuff it out.”
Ingall had waited a full day and night, during which he cried like a baby when they had shorn his hair as it was beyond saving while they’d so carefully tended to him before he couldn’t wait any longer.
Aurelia must have known his mind that mourning as Deuakilon was summonsed away. Ingall jumped at the opportunity given him. Slowly, damn his weak body, slowly he pushed himself from the bed and grasped the staff resting nearby. Along with the physical weakness, his balance was a mess due to the loss of his tails, which he mourned as keenly as the loss of his hair. Now, he needed to get a hold of a portal device and finally go home.
He’d borrowed Atalanta’s, who had been out on patrol. His grin hurt his face with how wide it had been as he opened the portal home, and for a frankly terrifying moment, he felt his Spirit waver as he stepped through. The distance for Aureila weakened and stressed it, though the fear was soothed instantly by the sound of chiming bells, a welcome home. He felt a little some of his strength returning with each step.
All that joy vanished as his eyes finally met Kit’s. He knew she suffered just as he did, but seeing it felt worse than the possession had. He’d taken a desperate half-shuffle backwards when she lunged aggressively. Not out of fear for himself but fear for her, as even a defensive attack, which is what he knew her aggression to be, likely would have killed him in his current state.
He wanted to vomit when she struck herself, but instead, he dropped his staff and ran to her in a panic, trembling fingers wrapped around the wrist that belonged to the offending hand, “Kiko,” he begged, tears pouring down his face, “stop, please stop! I don’t have the strength to stop you myself,” his free hand shaking just as badly as the other cupped her cheek as he pressed his forehead to hers.
Flinching at his touch she squeezed her eyes tight to escape the very vivid dream. She was drowning in sorrow at the sight, smell and touch of him. Not real… It’s not real. She chanted to herself, clinging on to it like a life line. If she dared hope otherwise it would cut whatever sliver she held on to in order to keep going. And if that happened… and it was just another dream… she knew she’d never recover. “I can’t keep dreaming of you.” She whispered brokenly. “I can’t.”
“P-papa?” Byakko’s shaky voice cut the silence that had fallen over them. Before the others could stop her the little kitsune ran over to grab his waist “Papa! Papa!”
Her wails triggered Kit’s auto pilot. How many nights had they woken to the sound of this child’s crying out, lost to her own nightmares? Kit pulled back from his touch to scoop up her daughter “No baby… it’s just a dream. Come on let’s get you back to bed.” Shushing the thrashing and protesting Bya in her arms Kit walked towards a unfamiliar house in a daze.
A sharp hand both steadied and stopped him from following as the elder children stood there frozen, looking at him in disbelief. Holding the youngest in her arms with her own son, Ginko whispered for them to follow her back to her home. “But-“ Shakko protested pain filled eyes locked on Ingall, Reiko had broken her gaze with a little cry. Giving his father (?) a final look Shakko pulled his arm around her and led her after Ginko. He promised to look after them after all, no matter how much he wanted to copy his younger sister and run to Ingall.
The hand slowly turned him towards Kuko’s equally sharp gaze. The kitsune examined him with a anger that melted into disbelief as he took in the other’s condition and the lack of feeling he’d had from the deity that had taken him over “It is really you, isn’t it?”
The elf let out a broken laugh as he threw his trembling arms around the kitsune in as tight of a hug as his pitiful state would allow, "By the Stars it's good to see you, you grumpy bastard!"
Surprisingly he was, if a little awkwardly, embraced back "And it is good to see you Cousin... shitty though you look." He pulled away from the hug, keeping an arm around the man as he helped guide him to a place to sit and rest. "How did this happen?"
Ingall's smile died as he began his sordid tale, "It wasn't my choice; that retched goddess forced her way in. I saw, heard, and felt everything she did, but I had no control. She trapped me within my Soul. It was like that for weeks; I felt myself slipping away a little more each day. Then suddenly one day I gained a bit of control," A twisted look of glee passed over his face, "She was fond of my appearance and that was the one thing within my meagre power to destroy, so I did."
He looked to the ground with a weary sigh, "Would have done us both in if Trahan and his mate hadn't found us. Long painful," he carefully untied his shirt to show the other male his chest. It looked as if something had ripped it open in a bid to climb inside his ribcage. Which wasn't far from the truth as the goddess had fought hard to stay within her vessel, "story short the Avarian Goddess Aureila saved me and imprisoned her. She went so far as to claim the Elves as her children so that goddess can't touch us even if she somehow escaped, but I don't see that happening ever. Hard to escape a crystal tomb, wreathed in an Elder Goddess's power."
Kuko looked at the other male with new respect "I am impressed you survived." he fell silent mulling everything over "While I am happy-" (its the end of the world as we know it~) "that you have returned..." he grimaced "We do not have an easy road ahead."
His eyes flicked back up to Ingall's "You saw Kit and the kids."
Wiping his once again tear-filled eyes, the elf nodded, "Nothing worth having is ever easy, Cousin," Ingall gave the kitsune the barest of smiles, "we elves," he grimaced. He didn't want to be an elf. It wasn't right, "are known for our patience. I will wait for them until time ceases to exist if need be. Would," he paused to take a shaky breath. He was growing worryingly tired, "Would you take me to rest near the Heart?"
Ingall placed a hand over the center of his chest, "My Soul er Spirit is fragile, I thought being at The Heart might help."
Pulling Ingall's arm around his shoulder as his arm looped around the elf's waist, Kuko easily picked him up while allowing him the dignity of not being totally carried. He started to make their way towards the Heart before murmuring "I would like you to know that I do not mean it ill but I will not let the others see you until you're more recovered. I will talk to the children. Ginko may come and tend to you at some point."
“I would,” he chuckled weakly, “as Ginko puts it, jerk a knot in your tails if you did anything otherwise…thank you both for caring for them,” he murmured before falling silent.
Kuko snorted "Please as though you could right now." he side eyed the eye as they neared the Heart's barrier "I have told you I take care of my own."
“I can still thank you for it,” the elf snarked.
Surprisingly Kuko chuckled as they walked into the barrier shroud. Once they reached the center Kuko leaned Ingall up against the base of the massive tree to rest. He stood and tilted his head down at the other "Do you have need for anything else now?"
“Hmm, besides a nap? Don’t let Deukalion find me once he’s discovered I fled the healing chambers. That man can be down right terrifying,” Ingall replied, giving Kuko a tired grin as he rested his head against the trunk of the Heart, already feeling leagues better.
Giving him a very familiar haughty face Kuko replied "Do you really think that I would allow anyone that was not family here?"
With that he left Ingall to rest, the gentle ringing of the chimes lulling him to sleep with soft melancholy peals. Ingall was woken by little sniffs and tiny fingers tentatively touching his cheek.
He forced his tired eyes open, brows furrowed in concern, as he looked for the source of the sniffling.
Even with the soft glow from the tree he could tell it was the dead of night from the light chill in the air. "P-papa?" Byakko whispered fearfully with tears clinging to her lashes. "Are you real?"
He pulled her into his lap and rocked them back and forth as much as his body would allow, “I’m real, Little Miss,” he choked, “I’m real.”
Little arms wound around his neck tightly as she shuddered with little cries. "I-I thought y-you were gone! Mama said- m-mama said..." she choked.
“I’m sorry honey, I’m so so sorry,” he whispered into her hair, “I’m here. I’m here, Byakko. I’m here.”
She cried a long while before she managed to calm herself and just laid collapsed against him. Her little fingers brushed the ends of his shorn hair, her voice hoarse from her crying "You cut your hair too?"
“It had to be cut,” Ingall sighed, “I know I don't look...” he trailed off as he looked at his hands, “You shouldn't have to see me this way, Bya.”
Byakko started to hyperventalate "D-don't go! Y-you c-can't leave again!" she pleaded grabbing his shirt tightly. "I-it's not bad! M-mama cut her's too! I-its ok! Y-you look w-wonderful!" she took a shuddering breath with her assurances. He looked horrible... but to her he looked perfect.
“I’m not leaving Bya. I promise,” Ingall assured, cupping her face, “but we had wanted to wait until I was healthier to see you all.”
She leaned into his hand ears drooping "I'm sorry Papa... I just had to know i-if you were a dream."
He nestled her under his chin, “it's alright sweetheart, but you do need to go back. Mama will be worried if she wakes up and you're not there. And I have an idea,” he smiled offering his arm, “cut a piece of my shirt and tie it around your wrist. That way, even when you wake up in the morning, you’ll have it and know this was real and not a dream.”
She'd tensed at first but relaxed a little at his suggestion. Bya chewed on her lip, before looking up at him with fear in her eyes "But... what if I wake up a-and it's not there?" she whispered broken heartedly.
Ingall thought for a few moments, then looked up to the Heart, “I don't have much to offer at the moment,” he spoke quietly to the great tree, “other than the shirt off my back, but I wish for something to assure her I’m here.”
"Papa!" She gasped scandalized looking up at the branches. A glass chime rang out before it tumbled from it's branch landing safely in a knoll of grass near them.... and nothing else seemed to happen. Not letting him go she leaned forward to investigate it revealed a little hand mirror. Byakko's brow furrowed before she gasped "Uncle Kuko's mirror!" She showed it to Ingall "He said h-he used it when he was Underground t-to look here."
Ingall smiled brightly, “That’s perfect,” he leaned forward to place a kiss to her forehead, then settled back against the Heart, “Now off to bed with you, Little Miss.”
Standing Bya leaned down to kiss his forehead "I love you papa." she whispered staring at him as she clutched onto the mirror before stepping into the Nethers to sneak back home.
"I love you, Bya," he called before she stepped into darkness, looking back up at the Heart he sighed tiredly, "thank you," he murmured as he drifted off once again.
The next few days, Kuko and Ginko took turns bringing him food and tending to his injuries. Byakko managed to stay away but only by checking the mirror several times a day. Kuko kept to his word keeping the others from him. He thought the trick had been more keeping Kit from the Heart.
It had proved easier than he would have originally thought. But that was due to a decline in Kit's own health due to the shock of the very realistic 'dream' she'd had. Not that he nor Ginko told the elf that news.
"How are you feeling today?" Ginko asked as she sat fresh food down for him.
"A little like I'm cycling through the stages of grief on loop and missing acceptance each time," he sighed.
"Well that is more than understandable." She offered him a sad smile "But I meant physically."
He huffed a startled laugh at that, "better, but not whole. I don't think I ever will until I'm a kitsune again."
"Don't even think of trying that anytime soon!" she waved a finger at him sternly "I can still barely feel your Sou- er Spirit as it is. It doesn't need the strain of that." They couldn't risk losing him again.
His eyes crossed as he looked at the finger pointed at his nose, "I know, I know, but that still doesn't change the feeling of wrongness this form has." Because it was wrong.
"Again that is very understandable." Ginko booped him lightly, hiding the worry gnawing in at her. "Listen Koko and I are going to be busy watching the Shrine and the kids tonight. With a full moon and Halloween around the corner we're seeing more activity with Spirits. You should be fine close to the Heart like this, but you'll need to stay close within the barriers. Ok?"
He nodded, "I'll stay right here; I'm done with possession in all its forms, thank you very much," though he did wonder if he had enough strength to summon up spirit magic if the Heart needed him to.
"Good." she pat his head like he was one of the kids. "I'm going to go get to it then. Do you need anything?"
He rolled his eyes affectionately as he chuckled, "You know I'm older than you, right? And no, I'm alright, thank you."
"Ah and yet here we are." Ginko smiled "Take care cousin." she gave him a little wink before going to attend to the aforementioned matters. After finishing his meal he peacefully drifted back to sleep.
Much as he had been his first night a soft voice woke him. But it was not his daughters.
"Sorry it took me so long to check in." Kit's voice murmured on the other side of the tree truck that he was nested against. "I haven't been feeling my best."
He jolted awake at the sound of her voice, heart aching he froze, fearful the sight of him would cause her to spiral.
She continued unaware of his presence "But I can't shirk my duties forever right? Ginko and Kuko have more than picked up my slack enough." Kit tried to sound teasing but he could hear the exhaustion in her voice.
He wanted nothing more than to run to her, but that would cause them both more harm than good. The elf rested his head against the Heart, tears filling his eyes, desperate for guidance.
"Even the kids have picked things up." Kit continued tiredly. It was a small comfort in the familiar ritual of speaking the Heart as she tended it. But the comfort barely scratched at the surface of the pain on her Soul. Tears gathered in her eyes as she sat on one of the large roots as she whispered in confession. "It's just been so hard... and I am just so tired." she dropped her face into her hands.
Gathering his courage, Ingall whispered her name.
She let out a groan in her hands "I can't take more of these waking dreams. The sleeping ones are bad enough. Maybe this is why mother's Soul shattered right away when my father died. This is agony... I miss you Charmer." Kit let out shuddering breath. Maybe she was just fighting the inevitable. Her heart panged at the thought, thinking about her children she shook her head as she stood weakly. "Enough of this pity party. I'm here to work."
“Sit and rest,” he murmured, “I am here, Kit. A little broken and certainly not whole, but I’m here.”
"No you're not!" Kit bit back to the open air with a wave of her hand "You're a-a figment of my grief filled imagination." She turned slowly looking around "You know how I know? I saw you die. Felt it." her hand thumped against her chest "I felt it right here then I died." Maybe not on the outside, but on the inside she had.
The elf staggered to his feet and carefully walked around the tree’s trunk, using it in place of the staff that had gone off somewhere, “You’re right, I did, but Aureila gave me a second chance,” he explained coming to face her.
“I’m right here, Kit. And I’m not going anywhere,” he swore.
Now that he laid eyes on her, he got to see her looking nearly as rough as him. Her skin was pallid and dark stains under her eyes, eyes that were staring at him in disbelief. Kit shook her head tears pooling in her eyes "You can't be here. You can't."
“Look at what’s left of my Soul,” he begged, taking a step closer, “Ask the Heart, touch me, strike me, anything that will prove to you I’m real. That I’m here.”
She shrank in on herself as he got closer "N-no."
He knelt before her and light touched her hand, “Look at me, Kit, please,”
Kit flinched at the touch, another shudder running through her "I can't." her voice trembled nearly as much as her body.
He gently took hold of her hand and placed it on his chest over his heart, “Then don't use your eyes.”
She pulled back her hand like he'd burned her "You don't understand I can't!" Kit finally managed to dragged her tear filled eyes to look at him. "Even if you're not a dream o-or a desperate delusion..." she tried to steady her ragged breathing "Y-you're either still possessed by a deity trying to screw with me for whatever reason." flames crackled around her at the thought before an absolutely broken hearted look crossed her face "Or you're really here... and I pushed away my mate when he needed me most... abandoned.... A-and I just... I can't... I... I..." her eyes shuttered to a close as she collapsed to the ground.
Ingall hurriedly pulled her into his arms as he drug them both back towards the Heart, “curse that thrice-damned goddess,” he growled, panting, as he placed a hand on the great tree and another over Kit’s chest, “Lucky I’m still an elf,” he wasn't sure who he was speaking to. Frankly, it was a good thing they were alone; otherwise, someone would have tried to stop him. He let himself become a conduit for the Heart’s magic filling his entire being with Intent to heal.
~
The chimes in the branches sang out, (in alarm?), as power flowed through him like the first time he helped Kuko heal the tree when the Shrine was under attack. But he had been a kitsune then....
It was like a tsunami of magic crashing over him and would have washed him away were it not for the sudden flare from around his wrist.
His bracelet that the Heart had gifted him glimmered with life that it had not had since he became the vessel for the elvish deity. Once it once again connected him to the Heart it allowed him to focus the bulk of the rush through it like a filter. Now that it didn't threaten to tear him apart at the seams instantly he felt it filling him with magic and energy helping heal the wounds he'd received.
He gasped as tears of relief formed in his eyes but shoved those emotions aside to focus on Kit.
The bruise like shadows under her eyes slowly lightened as she lay limply in his arms, a little zip of magic went to a nick on her ear that even after weeks hadn't healed due to her poor health. Color may have returned to her face but she didn't seem better. Not really.
"What in Stars name are you doing?!" Ginko sprinted into the clearing "Being a damn fool." Kuko snarled partially appearing out of nowhere both called by the Heart's sounds of distress. His sister gasped seeing Kit in his arms "What's she doing here? She should be in bed!"
“She collapsed,” he snapped back, clutching Kit closer, “What was I supposed to do, twiddle my thumbs until someone came back?” the anger that had been simmering in his Soul finally boiling over, “Yes, I am a fool! For thinking I would be allowed a share of happiness in this life! That goddess may have marked me for misery at birth, but I’ll be thrice damned and left to rot in the Nether if anything takes her from this world early!” he took a breath, “Myself included, if I must I will destroy my memory from this world entirely.”
That earned him a very swift and hard hit to the back of the head from Kuko's fist, cushioned ever so slightly by his rapidly growing locks "Don't be stupid!"
Tsking Ginko crouched down to look at the pair "Are all elves so dramatic?" She asked gibbly trying to hide her fear. "Don't try anything drastic or I'll knock you out myself. Kit's tougher than we're giving credit. I mean... look at her. She's made it this far." she looked at him sternly "Got it?"
Ingall yelped, shooting a glare at Kuko, “It’s an inherited trait,” then glanced at Ginko, “That’s the price for our superior beauty and intellect, and yes, any great historical elvish figure has died a horrible death,” he mused, “Oh, I could be drastic, very easily, especially since I want to be whole again.”
Very sharp eyes pierced him and he got to learn that Kuko came by it honestly "Did I stutter? I will knock your butt out if you think about that right now. We have no idea if that is even possible or what it will cost if it is, and if even if it is it'd knock you on your ass. Right now she needs you." her tone said that was that as she pulled Kit's hand out. She gave a little sigh of relief as she inspected the other vixen's bracelet. "Good news is, it looks like her Soul is looking stable."
The elf looked as if he had sucked a lemon but wisely said no more. He tucked Kit more securely under his chin and moved to recline against the Heart. As angry and scared as he was, it didn't give him the right to take it out on his kin. He stewed for a longer before sighing and apologizing to them both, “It was wrong of me to hit you with my temper. Thank you both for putting up with me.”
That drew a small laugh from Ginko "Well perhaps you kept a little bit of your kitsune nature after all Cousin." Kuko grumbled an acceptance as he paced in agitation, not at the elf's lashing out but the situation.
Under his chin Kit made a little noise pressing close to his neck.
While he couldn't murr, the elf could still sing, and so he quietly sang the first song he shared with his mate.
It seemed to help her relax against him more.
The silver foxes stood and watched him before exchanging a glance. Nodding Kuko turned and exited the ring of trees around the Heart. "We're going to go back to what we were doing, ok?" Ginko whispered to him before handing him a slip of paper "Tear this if you need either of us." she looked at Kit "When she wakes up maybe go slow? Let her come to things on her terms."
Ingall didn't stop his quiet humming, but he took the slip of paper with a nod.
Giving him a final pat Ginko followed after her brother.
After she'd left the area was filled only with the sounds of the chimes and the elf's soft song. Eventually another sound met his ears from right underneath them. A little whimper accompanied by a trace of wet on his chest.
His song stopped, and he simply held her close, hoping the sound of his heart beat and the feel of his breath would sooth her.
"...miss you..." she breathed.
“I missed you so much,” Ingall murmured.
"Hurts." she groaned. Whether she meant in missing him or her body at the moment was up in the air. Kit rubbed her face against her pillow, baffled at how much it smelled like him given she'd burned absolutely everything that should have had any trace of him. The mind was a strange and cruel thing.
With the strength the Heart had given him, he let healing magic dance along his fingertips as he gently rubbed her back, filling the air with an herbal scent he hadn't been able to replicate since that night in the hot spring so long ago.
Kit did something she hadn't been able to in weeks... she gave a weak murr.
Maybe... maybe dreams weren't so bad. At least for now she could enjoy it.
Greatly bothered by the fact that he couldn't murr back, the elf started humming once again.
Tired eyes eventually slowly opened and looked up at him. Well his former form just solidified his being a dream. Tears rolled down her cheek as she stared up at him listlessly "I would give almost anything to stay here with you." her hand shook as it went to touch his cheek in apology "They need me..."
He took it and kissed her palm, tears of his own slipping past his lashes, “I know they need you, but you don't have to do it alone, My Dear Lady.”
"I know." she breathed eyes sliding shut again "But it's not the same as you."
As desperately as he wanted to scream, ‘I am here,’ the elf took a steadying breath and kissed her forehead, ‘Slowly, go slowly,’ he mentally chanted, taking Ginko’s advice to heart, “Stay as long as you like. Ginko and Kuko are looking after things. Rest, Kit, our children are strong.”
Her fingers tightened in his shirt holding him close. "Yeah." Kit opened her eyes again to look up at him "They miss you too." she was trying to enjoy this moment, being in his arms. Fear crawling at her, waiting for that moment that always came when his face became someone else's.
He’d leant his head back to rest against the Heart again, “Daydreaming about you all was the only thing that kept me sane.”
"I try not to think about you... but you're always there." Kit's eyes watered "Then you're gone again."
She pulled herself up level to his face framing it with her hands soaking him in, fingers softly carding through his hair letting out a shaky sigh. "But you're here now." And she was going to allow herself this moment even if hurt more later when she woke up. With that thought in mind she leaned forward and pressed her lips to his.
Ingall cradled the back of her head as he kissed her slowly, gently, and full of longing.
His fingers passed through her short hair, vastly different than her former long locks as she matched him kiss for kiss that grew in desperation. "Stay. Please stay." Kit whispered between kisses. "I would give up all my tails to have you stay. Please stay."
“I’m not going anywhere, Kit,” he murmured against her lips, “I swear it on the Heart.”
She pulled back to look at him. His taste on her lips. His smell all around her. His arms around her like a warm blanket.
Her heart gave a little tremble. She needed to end this dream, before it was too late for her. So she did the one thing that never failed to end the dream. "Ingall..." her mouth went dry "do you love me?"
The tender expression that crossed his face was one she’d beheld many times, “With all my Soul, Kit. I will love you until my dying breath and keep loving you when I’ve passed into the world beyond.”
Confusion crossed her face, her ears wilted as she touched his face. "I-I don't understand." His face didn't morph into the other. Didn't utter the words that made her heart shatter. He didn't disappear into nothingness. That's what always happened.
“I love you, Kit,” he smiled softly, “And I keep telling you so until you believe me. I love you,” he pulled her closer, “I love you,” pressing their foreheads together, “I love you,” Ingall spoke the words with all the strength in his Soul.
Her breathing quickened as she stared at him in disbelief "...Ingall?" Kit breathed.
“Yes, My Dear Lady?” he smiled.
"Ingall?" her voice cracked clutching him tighter.
The peppered kisses across her face, “That is my name, My Love, and how lovely it sounds from your lips.”
"B-but how? You... you were gone." Kit hyperventilated slightly "Gone. I saw you.. gone. How?"
“It wasn't easy,” he chuckled tiredly, “but between the combined efforts of Trahan, Ruby, Deukalion, and my own inherited kitsune stubbornness, Lady Aureila was able to save me.”
"They were able to save you." Kit repeated back numbly her hands leaving his face to cover her own "I didn't even try..."
He gently pried them from her face, “Kit, please look at me,” he asked softly, “you had our family to protect. You did what you had to do to protect them and yourself. I don't blame you for it. I would have been angry if you’d subjected yourself and them to that thing wearing my face.”
"You're my mate." she protested tearfully "I should have tried harder. Done everything. Done anything." Kit bowed her head in shame "And I didn't even think to try." After what happened to his mother, she'd assumed everything about him that made him, him was gone. But she should have tried "I'm so s-sorry that I left you alone when you needed me most."
“You never left me, Kit,” he chided softly, taking her hand into his to kiss them both before placing them over his heart, “you were with me the whole time, right here.”
She gave a little sob curling to lay her head against his chest overwhelmed by emotion. The beads brushing against his fingers from around her wrist gave a little shiver a hairline crack spreading on one of them.
He kissed her forehead and let them both fall into the Forest’s Soul, hoping the change of scenery would sooth them. The changes startled him a bit. Instead of the heady scent of fresh earth and growing things, sunshine and the perfume of wildflowers drifted on a gentle breeze. They floated in a leafy canopy filled with too many glowing lights to count. It all reminded him of Lady Aureila’s gentle smile.
Taking a shaky breath Kit turned to press her cheek against him as she looked around their new surroundings. After a moment she managed a weak chuckle "You'd tell me if we were dead right Charmer?" It did look a little heavenly after all, even more so than the first time they'd been there.
“As if I’d keep a secret from my mate, but I have to agree it looks much more ethereal now,” he smiled softly.
"It's pretty." Kit whispered laying against him, breathing leveling out exhausted. "If I fall asleep... you promise you'll be here when I wake up?"
“I promise,” Ingall murmured kissing her brow.
"Better." she muttered back, fingers digging into his clothes as her eyes slid shut.
He wasn’t sure how much time had passed as they floated peacefully in each other's arms. Ingall didn't really sleep, but he did find himself dozing on and off a few times.
Kit on the other hand was absolutely KO'd. Weeks of next to no sleep and emotional trauma strain on her Soul had wore her out.
Meanwhile at the Shrine~
"Where are they?!" Kuko snarled circling the heart.
"I don't know any more than you!" Ginko called back tersely searching for a sign. "Maybe he went back to his world and took Kit with her?" which earned her a very peeved look from her brother before they continued the search hoping to find their missing kin before the children work up. Thank goodness Tony was being such a trooper.
After a bit longer, he was assured Kit wouldn’t have any nightmares and fell asleep himself.
When he woke up he found himself wrapped up in Kit's arms, legs, and tails and her murring softly on top of him.
“Well, this is a fine way to wake up,” he chuckled huskily.
His voice roused Kit from her semi sleep state she'd slowly woken too "Hmm?"
“You’ve got me all tied up, Love,” he replied highly amused.
Her blue eyes slowly blinked up to his "I couldn't let you go." Kit murmured nuzzling his chest "You're still here."
“I promised, didn't I?” he whispered, kissing her forehead, “how are you feeling?”
"Tired, achy, over all questionable mental health." She inhaled leaning into him "And yet better than I have felt in what feels like forever." Kit semi teased with a laugh placing a kiss over his heart "What about you?"
“Very much the same,” he replied, returning the kiss with one to the soft fur of the ear closest to his lips, “though I’m still sorely missing my ears and tails.”
"I'm selfish enough to take you any way I can get you." Kit murmured moving to kiss his neck. "But maybe we can get them back."
She suddenly felt very self conscious of her shortened hair knowing elves feelings on cutting their own. "This might take a while to grow back..." she said apologetically touching her hair.
“As much as I love your long locks, I rather like this too,” he grinned impishly, leaning closer, “gives me better access,” he quipped before playfully nibbling at her neck.
That drew the first real laugh out of her that she'd had in forever. "Well there is that."
“Indeed~,” he hummed, “but I'm sure Tony could work his magic and get it back to normal if you’d like,” he grinned then blanched a bit, “Speaking of Tony, I do believe Ginko is going to skin me alive when we get back…I didn't exactly tell anyone we’d be doing this.”
"They'll understand." Kit assured kissing his lips. Truth be told he wasn't wrong... but they also weren't stupid enough to do anything to him in front of Kit for a looooong time for fear of losing limbs.
Ingall chuckled, “Ready to go back? Or would you like to stay here for a while?”
Kit fell silent before whispering "I know we should go back... but I'm scared."
He held her tighter, kissing her temple, “Tell me how to alleviate that fear, and I’ll do it.”
Laughing weakly Kit just held him tighter in return "Just still be there when we leave."
“I will be,” he promised, as the warmth of the Forest’s Soul was replaced by the stillness of the wee hours that blanketed the Heart, broken only by the worried and angry voices of the silver kitsune siblings.
Still holding on him tightly Kit looked over to the sound of her kin "Hey."
Two heads whipped around to look at them both "There you are! Where did you two go?!" Ginko demanded hurrying over, Kuko following at a more sedate pace, the flick of his tail the only indication of his aggitation.
“Just to the Forest’s Soul, I thought we could use a change of scenery,” Ingall muttered, then quickly added, “It doesn't take any magic to get there, so I wasn't doing anything drastic!”
Ginko's ear twitched but she didn't comment as she bent close to look over Kit "How are you doing?"
Arms tightened around Ingall "It was touch and go for a moment, but I feel better now."
Ingall rubbed soothing circles on her back.
She leaned into him "We'll have to figure out how to tell the kids." A thought hit "Oh my stars the other day really happened didn't it? They know?!"
Ingall cringed, “Yes, it did, but they’ve already talked to them,” he nodded to the silver pair.
“They’re strong, Love, and it wouldn’t have done for them to see me in that state anyhow,” Ingall soothed, “and don't worry about Bya. I had a sneaking little visitor my first night.”
"What?" came at him from three directions before Kit sighed "I am both surprised and not." She looked up at Ingall "Are you ready to see them? Ah!" she exclaimed before looking chagrined "Also incase the others hadn't told you... we have a new house." She couldn't quick get herself to confess to burning down their home.
Ingall blinked in surprise at that before speaking, “Well then, a new home for new memories,” he nodded in understanding, “and I’d very much like to see them, please.”
"Can either of you even walk?" Kuko asked dryly.
Ingall arched a brow then stood easily with Kit in his arms, not trembling in the slightest, “Between the Heart and the Forest’s Soul, I’m more than well enough for this.”
He rolled his eyes as Kit had a smile tugging at her lips as she wrapped her arms around his neck. "That makes me so happy." she whispered in his ears, not that he was carrying her but that he was well enough to do so.
He kissed her cheek, “Me too. If Kuko still had to cart me around, Shakko and Reiko would never let me live it down,” he teased.
Kuko arched a brow at that as Kit giggled lightly. Ginko couldn't hide her look of relief at the other kitsunes happiness as they walked home. Kuko vanished at some point to investigate something or take some time to himself perhaps. Either way by the time they reached Kit's newly built house dawn was starting to spread on the horizon. "I'll bring the kids home after they wake up." Ginko promised getting ready to split off towards her own home.
Ingall nodded, “see you all then.”
Ginko gave him a little squeeze to his shoulder "Happy to have you home." she murmured before leaving the couple to themselves. The house was drastically laid out differently than it had been before (quite intentional) as Kit quietly directed him where her- their- room was.
Ingall laid her down and crawled in with her.
"My Charmer." she breathed looking at him lay next to her in mild disbelief, quickly moving back into his arms.
He held her tight, “My Dear Lady, I’m home.”
"You're home." she whispered back pulling him down for another kiss her feet and tails twineing with his legs.
It was a good thing the children wouldn't be up for a while yet as the pair began to reacquaint themselves with each other.
~
Morning came and Ingall woke to Kit stuck to him like velcro deeply asleep.
Chuckling softly, Ingall carefully sat them both up, Kit still tucked comfortably under his chin as he listened for the arrival of the rest of his family.
Her ears twitched a little in her sleep as she picked up the sound of a familiar toddler's laugh outside. From the window he could see the remaining trio of kids trying to catch the little bugger as he ported from place to place on the way to the house. "Wait, wait, wait!" Ginko called in amused exasperation as she too gave chase with her wee one in her arms.
The enter scene had the elf shaking in silent laughter.
"Cheat codes! Cheat codes"! Shakko yelled after Tum with a laugh, narrowly missing the cackling tot. The noise managed to rouse Kit from her slumber with a sleepy hum.
“We’re about to be invaded, My Dear Lady,” Ingall murmured highly amused.
Kit rubbed at her eyes before chuckling and adding in her own murmur "We need clothes." she yawned "And coffee."
Snorting the elf rustled up their clothes, “There’s one thing done.”
Kissing him under his jaw as she stood to get quickly dressed while their family grew rapidly closer. More so than she thought as a blur of purple appeared in the room "'Prize Mama!" Touma declared with his hands in the air with a grin that briefly went away at the sight of the elf.
Quick footsteps raced down the hall "Sorry Mom! Tum was ready ta... see ya..." Shakko trailed off as they all rounded the corner. They looked between him and Kit uncertainly before Tum squealed "Papa Gall!" and charging at him full tilt colors flashing erratically.
Ingall laughed warmly as the tot bowled him over, “Good morning, Tum,” he smiled, wrapping his youngest son in a hug before looking at his eldest, “Too old for hugs now, are we, Shakko?” he asked teasingly.
Shakko was standing there clearly trying to compose himself rubbing at his eyes harshly as Byakko shot past him to hug Ingall too "P-papa your hair grew back!"
"Sorry, I didn't have a chance to talk to them before that one decided he wanted his mommy." Ginko apologized nodding towards Tum in explanation to the children's shock, patting the eldest's back soothingly. Reiko sniffed stumbling forward to hug him too "H-hi."
“It did, Little Miss,” he grinned, “Hello, dear one,” then Ingall somehow managed to embrace all the children that had run to him, and half-hopped half-shuffled with the lot of them to get his hands on Shakko too. With Tum hanging onto his neck, Bya on one shoulder and Reiko in his left arm that left the right free to the other redhead.
Shakko took a shuddering breath as he returned the hug tightly. Byakko shifted so she could slip between him, his face pressed against Ingalls shoulder she nuzzled between them both to give him little foxxy kisses. Kit's arms wrapped around them sandwiching the children between her and her mate.
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On P5R ending (true end) song v.2 - translation and analysis
part one was here - I’m only feeling things here but still xD
Okay so first of all, the following translation of the song lyrics is made by me so if you somehow want to copy paste them somewhere, please link the source, thank you <3 The original japanese and translated lyrics you can find at the very end of this post.
My point here is to prove that the lyrics are Akiren’s feelings towards what happens with Akechi so the post is going to contain some Persona 5 Royal spoilers. It gets a bit shippy.
I need to say this - I had a second of doubt there, because I thought those lyrics could as well suit Yoshizawa sisters, if one wanted to dig that way. It doesn’t though, because the subject/narrator is using the 僕 (boku) pronoun, which is reserved for males. If the lyrics were meant to be gender neutral or so, the more neutral 私 (watashi) would be used. That’s why I’m 100% sure it’s from Akiren’s perspective, and I will only give you more proof ;)
That night I realized my dream was (just) a dream, I close my eyes fixated on you.
The warmth, hands one on another, the voice, if I wake up it will all disappear into a dream.
The whole thing is kept within the dream-reality contrast. The night here is, I think, more metaphorical than anything, since it’s deepening the symbolism and refers to the association of night and dreaming.
It doesn’t have to, though, since at the very beginning of the new arc, Akiren ‘wakes up’ in the school, wearing his inmate clothes, thinking something is wrong and that he needs to go back. He follows the butterfly which we know is supposed to be the form Lavenza takes in the places she can’t fully materialize in.
I think it isn’t such a literal reference though. I’d say it refers to Akiren noticing the weird things happening around him, realizing they weren’t like this before and they should be impossible. Then we jump straight into gay the moment Akechi walks into Leblanc. Akiren can’t help but be surprised, he stares at the detective, who is supposed to be held at the police station or wherever his interrogations are being held at the time. He closes his eyes, as if to hold the image of Akechi being there in his mind for longer.
I think the next line is pretty obvious and really surprising, if we agree on my little theory, because it straight up tells us about Akiren’s feelings. Akechi, who was supposed to be dead in the first place, comes back into his life for the second time this... week I think. Akechi, who Akiren has a really strong bond of rivalry and at the same time deep mutual understanding with. He wishes for Akechi to continue being a part of his life, as he gives him the kind of stimulation no one else does. Akechi is very, very special to him. You can basically say, he is Akiren’s dream.
Even if we can’t ever meet again, even if the time we spent together transforms into pain,
Please guide me with that pain, towards the night sky full of stars that illuminate me.
Now we are thrown into the hole of pain and suffering. We got to know that Akechi’s miraculous return is Maruki’s doing. Akechi is Akiren’s justice arcana, not only because he always speaks of justice and sticks to his own. He is a sort of counterweight and at the same moral compass to Akiren, they complement each other in many ways. Interacting, sharing thoughts, getting to know each other, it all leads both of them to build up even more resolve to stick to their own justice. So, even if Akiren decides to reject Maruki’s offer, not folding, not running away, following through with his own justice and his own truth, even if it means he is going to lose Akechi again, and the memories of the time they spent together will transform into pain, even then, Akechi will still continue to be his guiding light. He will always remember him, he sort of wishes for Akechi too look over him from... well, I guess, the afterlife. He will always live in Akiren’s heart as pain and regret of not being able to be together more, not being able to save him, but also as everything he was to him while still alive.
I was able to meet you in that sweet, sweet fairytale kingdom in distorted world.
You quietly closed the mouth that said “even if it’s false happiness, it’s okay”.
This line is a bit more complicated than it looks like in English (actually, the whole song is like this, but if I started to explain all the hidden meanings and my translation choices it would take too much). I need to say here though, in the original it’s 甘い甘い (amai amai) which can actually mean two things. It’s used both as sweet and naive. I chose to use sweet here twice, but I think in japanese it’s supposed to be a bit ambiguous, as naivety is something Akechi often accuses Akiren (and other people) of, even if not directly (ex. there is this line of his where he says Akiren coming just to see him is ‘brainless sentimentality’).
The fairytale kingdom is of course a way to refer to Maruki’s perfect world where all dreams come true, it’s one way to see it. The other is distorted world, and it’s ultimately how the people who are aware of it’s falsehood view it. This way of putting the contrasting views together shows the dilemma Akiren stands before. He needs to confront it and make a choice, which in any outcome will result in gaining one thing and losing another.
Then, a really important line, one of a few that adress someone (Akechi) as ‘you’. In japanese it’s expressed through the verb that can mean close (something) up as well as shut (someone) up which I think is amazing in a way, since the Black Mask Akechi would rather shut up this mouth full of lies. There is an omanotopeic adjective there though, which indicates he did it quietly, gently. At first I thought it’s literal. That it’s about Akechi shutting up Maruki, so his words won’t affect Akira, since the thing there is basically a quote, it’s also gramatically written that way in the lyrics. But the quietly/gently thing kept bothering me, and I think in the end it’s like this: Akiren, in his heart, was tempted to agree to Maruki’s deal, to his perfect world. But Akechi, holding on to his own beliefs and resolve, made Akiren realize he can’t disrespect his wishes by being selfish. Akechi kept fiercely rejecting Maruki’s world, not wanting to be controlled by someone ever again, set on forging his own path, his own truth. Akiren couldn’t go against it.
It’s, I think, one of the reasons why this song plays only when you get the True End. It’s because you do things following Akechi’s wish, inspired by him to fight for the truth and the real.
When there comes a day when memories start, you will be gone, it’s the path you chose yourself,
Even if walking it is always heartrending, towards the stars of tomorrow that I’m aiming for.
I think this part was the hardest of them all to translate, it’s again pretty ambiguous, not only because of the used words though, but the different ways you can chop the sentence at. You can translate it both as “it’s the part you chose yourself” or “the part one choses for themselves” and following this you can also chose to translate it in first person view as “the path I chose for myself”. I think all of them are pretty cool but I chose to follow the logic of the consequence, since it appears after yet another ‘you’ I decided to go with that. It also goes well with the thing about Akechi choosing his fate himself. He chose to reject Maruki’s world even if it meant he will disappear again, he strongly believed it’s better to die than live in a reality forged and controlled by someone else. He made that choice, like he made every other choice in his life before, aware of the consequences, even if they were painful to the point anyone else may have broken down. He doesn’t have any regrets, even if it’s hard and kills him in the end, because it’s the path of his own choosing.
‘The day when memories start’ it’s a pretty literal translation, but I’m fairly sure it’s about the fact that the time everyone spent in Maruki’s ideal world will be overwritten once again to how it should have gone if not for the distortion. So the day when the Phantom Thieves steal his treasure and defeat him is going to be the day when everything goes back to normal and the memories start being the true ones again, not falsified, and the false ones erased.
The stars of tommorow, the future, the goal both Akiren and Akechi are aiming for, even if their methods differ, is the same. Akiren hopes that if they continue going on, their paths will lead them to the same place, where they will be able to meet again.
When I wake up, the real world comes back, different than yesterday. Because the sadness is important, I’m going to keep on living tomorrow.
Now that the decision has been made and Maruki defeated, his treasure stolen, everything is going back to normal. Akiren wakes up in the real world again, it’s a different world than day before, because it’s the real one again. He thinks about Akechi, about the sadness engraved in his own heart, but he is going to keep going. He is going to keep his promise to Akechi. He is going to live with this sadness as it’s the memory of him, the proof that he lived and that he was important.
Even if we can’t ever meet again, even if the time we spent together transforms into pain,
I’m going to overcome even this pain, greater than (the pain that comes from) surpassing the tears I shed
Akiren doesn’t cry, it’s not the way to remember Akechi. It’s hard, but even though his tears would naturally flow, he is surpassing them, he can only shed them in his mind. It’s in a way unfair. He can’t really speak to anyone about it, he can’t tell the true story, honestly there is probably noone who could understand the bond that was born between him and Akechi, who could understand Akechi himself. The pain of the loss is even greater than that though. He may never meet Akechi again, but he is set on keeping the promise they made till the end. Because now, it’s not the end, he will keep on going.
And I will grab it, perfectly clear sky, our light, floating eternally.
It’s very important, as it’s also the title of the song. ‘Our light’, the light that belongs to them both. The hope, the justice, the truth, the image of it clear as the perfectly clear sky. He will hold out his hand and grab it, he will keep it in his hands, his, mind, his heart. He won’t let go of it, it’s their mutual dream and goal, it’s something they share and something that will allow them to meet again.
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Thank you for reaching the end of this post... xD If you have any thoughts on it, don’t be shy to share!
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lyrics:
Our light
That night I realized my dream was (just) a dream, I close my eyes fixated on you.
The warmth, hands one on another, the voice, if I wake up it will all disappear into a dream.
Even if we can’t ever meet again, even if the time we spent together transforms into pain,
Please guide me with that pain, towards the night sky full of stars that illuminate me.
I was able to meet you in that sweet, sweet fairytale kingdom in distorted world.
You quietly closed the mouth that said “even if it’s false happiness, it’s okay”.
When there comes a day when memories start, you will be gone, it’s the path you chose yourself,
Even if walking it is always heartrending, towards the stars of tomorrow that I’m aiming for.
When I wake up, the real world comes back, different than yesterday. Because the sadness is important, I’m going to keep on living tomorrow.
Even if we can’t ever meet again, even if the time we spent together transforms into pain,
I’m going to overcome even this pain, greater than (the pain that comes from) surpassing the tears I shed
And I will grab it, perfectly clear sky, our light, floating eternally.
